Rap Jokes + Routines by Jon Mick - Artist, Comedian and Joke Writer - Jokes, Funny Stories, Comedy Routines and Parody Songs

Also, I am a big fan of RUN DMC, THE FAT BOYS, THE BEASTIE BOYS, ENIMEM, KID ROCK, MISSY ELLIOT, VANILLA ICE, SNOOP DOGG and SIR MIX A LOT.

Also, I had 2 black employees who worked for me on Wall Street as Software Engineers. One I hired. The other was previously with the department.

As an Artist, I have done paintings and drawings of Halle Berry and Mariah Carey.

WARNING – I would not “emulate” this behavior or “copy” it. Dangerous.

NOTE – I was 225 6’ 50” Chest 18” Arms 36” Waist – Self Defense Expert

RAP MESSAGES

Now… I must “share’ some of my Rap Joke Routines…

In my hometown in the 1990s and 2000s, I used to fight off some Young Brothers in packs of 5 to 8 on the sidewalk of our Main Street - Broadway – that had a narrow sidewalk…

Some brothers are known only to fight (or wild) on white teenagers 13 to 18 - 7 to 5 to 3 on 1.

Not really a good thing to do… or be proud of…

Some blacks will never fight one on one.

The rep as the toughest strongest race is simply - not true.

As they approached without “yielding” to a White “Cracker” such as myself.. (which I was just “harassed” with the other day when I black guy with his friend saw me pass 25 Black people waiting for a bus at train station – since I was “highly” outnumbered…)

SIDEWALK ENCOUNTERS

I would loudly say this as they approached – without “yielding” on the sidewalk…

Listen Brothers!!!

Make Room on The Sidewalk

Make A Lane!

You Don’t Own The Sidewalk!

Evil Jews, Nazis, MTV, Viacom and DeathRow Records LIED TO YOU!

THE THUG LIFE is a DEAD END…

RAP IS DEAD – OVER 20 YEARS OLD

ITS “MIND CONTROL“ BY THE EVIL JEWS – (MTV owned by “Maury Fishbaum” – Sumner Redstone)

THE THUG LIFE IS A EVIL CON

To keep you Brothers down… In Society

And Remove you from society – by ending up in prison or dead

You can’t be PUNKING OUT – WHITEY!!! ALL DAY

(He might kick your ass – all over the sidewalk)

Make A Lane!

RAP COMMENTARY

This is about being “annoyed’ by Jive Talkers and Hip Hopsters who think they are “cool” acting like a teenage “fool” – in their 30s, 40s + 50s

I understand as a teenager you want to “rebel” and have your own sense of “style” and “identity” and have fun talks with your friends.

But things are sort of “out of hand” with this Jive Talk Hip Hop Culture…

No one will want to “hire” you if you act this way… outside your friends.

Or even be around you…

DON CORNEILUS IS DEAD – (SADLY…. I LIKED HIM + SOUL TRAIN)

SHUG KNIGHT IS IN PRISON – GETTING ASS F*CKED

DR DRE AND EMINEM – ARE RUMORED TO BE “GAY” LOVERS

MARSHALL MATHERS – HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN WITH A “WOMAN”

RUSSELL SIMMONS ENSLAVED YOU WITH AN EVIL “DISCOVER” CARD – THE RUSH CARD

AND RUSSEL SIMMONS LIVES THE HAMPTONS – PARTYING WITH WHITE WOMEN

(MOSTLY LIKELY MARTHA STEWART AND POSSIBLY CHRISTY BRINKLEY : )

YOU CAN’T ACT LIKE THIS ANYMORE!!!

NO ONE WANTS TO LISTEN TO THIS “JIVE” TALK – ANYMORE!

GROW UP!!!

AND BE A MAN – AND GET ALONG WITH PEOPLE

NOTE – Dr Dre and Enimen ARE STRAIGHT – IT WAS JUST FOR LAUGHS

(As far as I know…)

TOTALLY TRUE STORY – VERIFY BY CALLING – LOCAL POLICE

MY JIVE HIP HOP LINGO

I’m not a WHITE CRACKER – HONKEY – UPTIGHT – COMPUTER NERD – WALL STREET YUPPIE – PUNK? HOMMES?!!!

I am down ( Cool Hip Guy… Macking on the Ladies…)

I know the “word” on the “street” (info from Silicon Valley + Wall Street)

The “411” (The Real Deal and insider stock tips and portfolio mgmt)

I’ll be “chillin” with my “hommies’ (People in my Neighborhood –NYC)

Kicking back… talking with my “peeps” (Close Trusted Friends + Advisors)

In the “hood” of New York City… (Tribeca and Soho – actually… : )

I know what’s “droppin” on Tuesday (New York Times – Science Section)

We talk about what is “phat” and “sick” (New, Cool and Popular)

So… Step Off… Hommes (Home Slice or Loud Mouth Nasty Punk Loser)

Back Off Dog… Before I break your “set” (Round House To Your Jaw)

STREET “CRED”

Due the fact, I am being “harassed”, “falsely convicted” and “imprisoned” by a “evil” police department now involved in “corporate espionage” of my Research Computer Scientist work and former Silicon Wall Street career in the 1980s and 1990s

- Did 2 Years in County Jail – 2012 and 2015

- Never got my “ass” kicked by anyone

- Had 2 fights – 1 with a brother – black women fainted + cried as I kicked his ass – after he sucker punched me and spit in my face – for no reason

HCCC – Hudson County Jail is 85% Black 10% Hispanic 4% INS ICE 1% “Artist Jon Mick” as the only white guy in county jail.

The 85% Black in HCCC come from Martin Luther King Jr Drive and Ocean Avenue in Jersey City NJ – An outrage that needs to be addressed and corrected.

It takes 6 months to be indicted – before you can plea deal or dismiss

99.9% of all prisoners at HCCC are INDICTED.

But “few” people – every see Grand Jury members at the Court House – EVER

Many of whom are my now friends on mine – I see on occasion in Jersey City NJ

E-Mail

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