Rating: PG
Disclaimer: Arezoo does not own Harry Potter. Or Ron, or Malfoy (as much as she would like that...) Or even Jem. She does own Rachel though, so Rachel belongs to her. But the rest is a work of fiction... pay no attention to it, especially the strange fixation with a lunchbox... yes.
Chapter: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]
Jemaine led them to the teacher parking lot where he kept his car. He wasn’t sure how he was going to fit them in…but he wasn’t thinking about that. As they approached his bright green (and rusty) Morris Minor, he was wondering how they would respond to the vehicle. It was just as he expected. Draco stopped in his tracks and stared at the battered car.
“You have got to be kidding. That car should be illegal, nothing so wrong should be able to stand on wheels!” He said. Jemaine blushed and quickly opened the door and shoved his bag in.
“Look, there is no other way I can take you…unless, no, wait, you probably don’t want to walk?” He asked.
“Walk? What the hell is that? Never heard of it.” Draco sneered. “I’ll rather take the freak machine. Oh, and Weasley, I owe you an apology. I think I said once that there was no car uglier than your flying car…apparently I was wrong.” Jemaine had the urge to hit Draco at that moment, but he controlled himself very well.
“Look, Jemaine, I’m sure it’s fine…although it does look rather small. Perhaps this will help.” Hermione said, as she took out her wand and did a spell. Nothing appeared to change. Jemaine opened the back doors to let them in, and jumped back in shock. The inside of the car was ten times as large and looked like it could have fit another six people.
“Woah! How’d you do that? It looks the same from the outside!” Hermione just smiled and got into the back, followed by Ron, Ginny, Draco and finally Harry. As Harry was getting in, Jemaine noticed that he was making a big scratch with his wand on the side. He slammed the door extra hard on Harry.
During the car ride, Jemaine tried to make conversation. “So, what’s it like being able to do magic?” He asked. There was a silence, which was filled by Harry,
“Well, it’s better than not being able to do it. What’s it like being a muggle?”
“A what?” Jemaine asked.
“I thought you said you read the books.” Harry asked, starting to go red with fury.
“Um, no, I never said that, I said I saw the films.”
“Yeah ok. What the hell are they like? Can we see them? Wait, don’t tell me…I bet they got a real loser to play me…Elijah Wood? No wait, not angry enough.”
“Um, some guy called Daniel Radcliff…why do I know this?”
“DANIEL RADCLIFF??? THAT GIMP…IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY, HE DOSEN’T HAVE HALF OF MY GOOD LOOKS…”
“Hey, what about me?? They could obviously find no one to master my good looks, so I will definitely be prepared to be disappointed.” Draco said modestly.
“Um actually, they found quite a good looking guy to play you…Tom Felton.”
“Sorry, disappointed.”
Jemaine shrugged, “I thought he was pretty.” He quickly stopped himself before he said anything more. They were already looking at him strangely. “Um, so anyway, I’ll get the books for you to read and the films to watch.” It was then that they had driven into the parking lot of Jemaine’s flat.
With his unsatisfactory teacher’s income, he could hardly afford a good car, let alone a proper house. Anyway, he had taken a liking to living in a flat. As they got out of the car, they all looked around like they hadn’t been inside a building before.
“They have these…ah, apartments in London don’t they Harry?” Ron asked, gazing around.
“How the hell should I know? Do I look like I get out? NO!” He sniffed and pushed past to the doors Jemaine was getting into. Jemaine led them through to the lifts, and had to stop Ron from touching everything inside, for Ron (and Ginny) were the least muggle experienced.
“What does this do?” Ron would say, pressing five buttons at once.
“That would probably kill the lift, then we’d have to spend time together in the lift, trying to rekindle a love for each other, just like Victor and Anne.” Jemaine answered. They all stared at him, blinking, until Draco said,
“Mills and Boons again, Jemmy?” “Um, no, actually…” Jemaine was glad the lift got to the 5th floor, so he wouldn’t have to explain. They crossed the small hallway, and headed for the door, where Jemaine unlocked it and let them inside. Even though his humble abode, as he liked to call it, was small, Jemaine was proud of the modest furniture and the tidiness of the flat. He was very neat in every aspect, there was no paper strewn everywhere, and shoes had to be taken off at the door. He told them this fact, and they all proceeded to take of their shoes, except Draco.
“Draco, you heard Jemaine, take of your shoes!” Hermione whispered to him.
“No, who is he to boss us around??” Was his answer.
“Look, what’s the problem, we’re all doing it.”
“No, make me.”
“Oh, fine, Accio shoes!” Hermione performed the spell, and Draco’s shoes flew into her hand. She then realised why he didn’t want to take off his shoes. Draco was wearing floral pink socks with yellow ducks covering them. Draco blushed, and everyone started laughing, even Jemaine.
“Malfoy has girly socks!!” Harry laughed for the first time in…lets just say a long time.
“Shut up Potter! Your parents are dead!” Draco took a stab.
“Sorry Malfoy, won’t work.”
“Daniel Radcliff plays you!” That shut Harry up.
“That was a low shot Malfoy.” And Harry resumed his all too familiar scowl.
“Let’s try to get along, shall we?” Jemaine replied, trying to make peace. He then took them all into the living room, where they all lounged on the couches, stretching.
“Hey, Jem? What’s this?” Ron asked, pointing to the television.
“It’s a TV, asshole. The Dursleys have one. Not that I’m allowed to see it or touch it.” Harry replied coldly, “You watch stuff on it…it’s meant to be rather exciting, right Jem?” Jemaine couldn’t believe they hadn’t watched TV.
“Oh yes! It’s the window to the outside world…here, I’ll put it on.” He then proceeded to put the TV on. The minute it was switched on Harry started complaining.
“I don’t like it…too many colours, too many things moving at once! What if we’re colour blind our have bad astigmatic eyes??…”
They spent the remainder of the evening watching Shortland Street and Survivor. Draco had taken a liking to Shortland Street, he had leaned forward and his eyes were glued to the screen.
“I just don’t understand, why can’t Dom tell her his feelings, it’s like in hiding them, he is suffering needlessly.” Jemaine just shook his head and smiled. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Jemaine was as confused as the others. He hardly got visitors on a weekday. He went to the door and told the rest to be quiet. When he opened the door he saw who it was. Arezoo and Jess. Jemaine’s neighbours…and, ah, friends.
“Hey Jemaine. We heard noises, who’s there?” Arezoo asked, craning her neck to see past the door.
“What’s it to you? I have company.”
“It’s just, we’re bored. And we thought we heard Draco.”
“WHAT? HOW THE HELL- I mean, Draco who?”
“You know, Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter?” Jess said, “C’mon Jemaine, we’ve told you to read the books…”
“So you think the characters are in my house, oh, you make me laugh, ha ha ha ha!” Jemaine forced a laugh, although it sounded fake even to him.
“Look, you can’t fool us, we can hear his sarcasm from far away, and he’s not just a character, he’s real! Draco is the boy who lived!” Arezoo said excitedly. Jemaine rolled his eyes,
“Yeah, like I believe that, why don’t you guys just go…DRACO, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING??” Jemaine had heard glass smashing, and turned around quickly. Draco was pointing his wand at one of Jemaine’s lamps. He shrugged, and said,
“Shortland Street finished, so I thought, I can try Quiditch practice.” He then continued to smash the lamps. Jemaine ran up to him and grabbed his wand.
“No magic here! Do you here that Draco Malfoy?”
By then Arezoo and Jess had let themselves into the house. They were not at all surprised. They were expecting the visitors. It was then that Jess swore loudly, “
Dammit! Lulu’s not here! I mean, we performed the spell to include him too and then, he goes and gets himself separated!”
“What spell?” Jemaine asked suspiciously.
“Oh, we might as well tell you. It was us who tried to, uh, transfer these guys here. It worked quite well, but apparently Lucius did not come…” Arezoo said.
“You did what?”
“Look, we just did it for fun, and then we chose you to find them, because you’re good at containing things, and we knew you would, ah, contain this from getting out of hand…”
“You got that right! Of course I would contain it! I can’t believe you would do something so stupid!!” Jemaine was passed yelling now. He was yelling and spitting.
“Hey Jemaine, calm down, why don’t ya? We know what we’re doing…we’re just trying to bring some fun to this muggle world. We’ll get them back, we promise.” Jess smiled sweetly, her fingers crossed behind her back.
“So Jem-Jem, where are we sleeping?” Draco yawned.
“You, Draco, are sleeping in my room-“ Jemaine answered.
“I thank you for the compliment, but I’m sorry, I don’t swing that way.” Draco said. Jemaine just sighed, and walked away. Draco was slowly getting on his nerves, and he had to spend the night with him too,
“Oh, just shut up, and go to sleep, you ungrateful git.” By the time they were all settled, hardly anyone could sleep. It was uncomfortable being squashed in the same bed as Draco. Jemaine was never going to share a bed with him, but there were no other mattresses and it was a very cold night, and the bed was after all a double one. Draco had found it uncomfortable too, but fell asleep immediately. As Jemaine lay awake looking at the ceiling and listening to Draco’s rhythmic breathing, he started thinking of ways to get them all as quickly as possible to England. Obviously, they could take a plane, but Jemaine was worried they were too recognisable. He decided to talk to Jess and Arezoo tomorrow. If they got them here, they could get them back.
It was around 5 in the morning, when Jemaine woke up. The room was filled with smoke, and it was still wafting in from the kitchen. He ran in there, shirtless, ready to face a fire. Instead he found Harry, working over a stove, a saucepan filled with burned eggs. He turned around and grinned at Jemaine.
“Hey Jemaniey!! I’m cooking breakfast, eggs Harry Potter style…I dunno, I’m in a good mood. Probably cause I realised I’m in no mortal danger today…Voldermolt will never find me here, hehehe.”
“Volder-what? Wait, don’t tell me. So, what is Harry style eggs, BURNT EGGS?” Jemaine scowled.
“Ah, I knew you would jest, but I’m alright with it! It’s the new improved Harry. No, Harry style eggs are not burnt eggs, look.” Harry then showed Jemaine the eggs. They were shaped like the lighting bolt scar on his forehead. At that moment Draco walked in.
“Looking into the mirror of Harry are we? Do we see things that were and are?” He giggled at his little joke. “Oh, dear GOD, put a shirt on, you’re going to cause someone to go blind, looking like that!” He screamed. Jemaine mumbled something inaudible and walked out of the room. Harry then started humming ‘black socks, they never get dirty…’ to himself.
“Why the light mood Potter? Where’d the angstyness go?” Draco asked, yawing.
“Ha ha, Malfoy, you can’t bring me down, I’m in a good mood today!” He then carried on humming. Suddenly the front door burst open, and Hermione and Arezoo came in giggling.
“And you know what he said to me once? He said that I can think about it and-hehehe.” Hermione stopped herself as she noticed Draco and Harry staring at them.
“Had a good night, ladies?” Draco asked, “Any good pillow fights?”
“No pillow fights, Draco. But we did have a good night talking about…things.” Arezoo said, smiling.
“So anyway, I was meant to ask you. Why exactly and how did you bring us here?”
“Well, that’s simple. We found a charm to bring book characters alive. We just read part of the story, where we wanted you to land…and, voila, you were here. For why, well, as we said, we thought it was fun, and we were bored, I mean, let’s way it up. Assignments or Draco Malfoy? I think it’s quite clear.”
“Well, thank you ladies. I appreciate the compliment. Now, there’s the little matter of how do we get back? I’m sure you thought of that.”
“Oh, you can’t go back.”
They all had breakfast and sat around the coffee table. Thankfully it was a Saturday and Jemaine didn’t have to work. There had been an argument about who was going to use the shower first. It ended up being Draco, he had insisted that his hair was turning into Harry’s, and everyone agreed. Harry had sulked. But now that they were here, Jemaine decided to address the issue of getting them back, “So, how are we gonna get you guys back? I guess the plane is-“
“No one’s going back Jemaine.” Jessica said.
“What? What do you mean, you crazy ol’ wench?”
“What we mean, is that, the spell is irreversible.”
“WHAT? WHY? HOW????”
“Very simple, the portkey they used is gone…you ate it.” Arezoo added, grinning.
“The portkey?”
“The sandwich, you ate it didn’t you? Oh Jemaine, what have you done?” Ginny asked, shaking her head.
“I was hungry.” Jemaine hung his head, and had the grace to look ashamed, “And it was salmon, c’mon!” Hermione sighed,
“I guess we’re stuck here, until we find another way out.” Everyone looked at each other, waiting for their neighbour to come up with an idea.
Jemaine finally addressed the issue,
“Well, as I was saying, you guys could take the plane, muggle transport. It’ll just cost a lot, and I’m, sorry, I don’t have the money right now. We’ll have to make it.”
“It’ all right, I have a large amount, I can make a simple withdrawal from Gringotts…”Harry muttered.
“No Harry, we need muggle money. The galleons and sickles you have will be no use here. We need New Zealand dollars…”Jessica said
Chapter: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6]