| Part 9 | Disclaimers |
Spoilers in this part: NIL
Paul closed the zipper on his suitcase before he lowered it to the floor as someone knocked on his opened door. He twisted to see Daniel step in, hands in his pockets, his face looking fresh from their joined sleep last night and a morning of work.
“What time’s your flight?” Daniel asked.
“Thirteen hundred.”
Daniel checked his watch; Paul would have to leave within the next fifteen minutes to make that flight.
There was an unease between them that both seemed to sense. An awkward silence fell over the room.
Finally Paul reached for his blue jacket and asked, as casually as he could muster, “How’s the Colonel?”
Daniel jerked at the question as if surprised by the voice. “He’s better. According to Janet his results are really improving. She doubts there will be any long-term problems from the oxygen deprivation.”
“That we’d notice,” Paul joked lightly as his arms slipped into the sleeves.
Daniel joined him in a soft laugh. “I’ll have to remember that when he wakes up.”
Paul lowered his chin to his chest and sighed heavily. He fastened the button on his jacket then reached for the hat still on the bed. Daniel scuffed his feet on the concrete floor, looking like he didn’t know what to say to Paul. When they’d woken in each other’s arms they were awkward for the first time since their first morning together. Paul put it down to the surroundings and the fear of being ‘caught’ with a man on a Military Base. They hardly spoke as Daniel got up, dressed then slinked from the room, hoping no one noticed.
Paul had remained in the bed, staring up at the ceiling, wondering about Daniel’s comments last night - that he was elated and scared and confused, about Jack… and about them. He never did get an answer to his question as to what part was what regarding Daniel’s feelings.
“And how are you?” Paul fiddled with the hat in his hands.
“Me?” The dark blond head lifted quickly, the over head lights flashed in the surface of the glasses. “I’m fine.”
“Do you want to talk about yesterday?”
“What’s to say?” Daniel said as he sat on the bed, his hands tucked beneath his thighs.
Paul went to the door and closed it after first checking the corridors were empty. He came back to the bed and unfastened his jacket button before he settled beside Daniel. He turned and placed his hat on the side table. “Are you going to try to tell him?”
Daniel gave a soft derisive laugh as he raised his face to the ceiling. “Ah,” he rolled his head to look at the man beside him. “No.”
“Don’t you think it’s about time that you did? Daniel, this is killing you…”
Daniel reached out without looking for him and squeezed Paul’s knee. “You help.” He said with a faint smile towards the ceiling.
Paul’s heart clamped and he looked down at his lap suddenly. “I’m not always going to be here, Daniel.”
The blue eyes turned to him. “What’s that mean?”
Paul’s heart thudded in his chest. “We both know what this arrangement is,” he said, his head bobbing nervously.
Daniel’s lips parted and his breath puffed through. “Are.. are you ending us.. this?” He asked.
Paul shook his head then he got up off the bed and paced. “Did you feel it this morning?”
“Feel what?” Daniel asked.
Paul clamped his eyes. “Exactly.”
Daniel shook his head and got to his feet. With a wisp of a smile he tilted his head and said, “I'm.. I'm sorry... I don’t understand?”
“Daniel, I woke up with you in my arms and it didn’t feel .. anything..”
Daniel cut in, “Paul, I’m not expecting you to love me?”
Paul searched the blue eyes intently. He went to say something then he clamped his jaw and looked away.
“Paul?”
“How did it feel for you this morning?”
Daniel thought about it. His eyes fell onto Paul’s watchful gaze and the older man started nodding as he saw the same kind of realization in Daniel’s eyes that he felt this morning.
“It didn’t feel .. wrong… did it?” Paul checked. “In fact, it felt.. natural?”
Daniel swallowed. “We’re good friends though..”
Paul gave him a kind of look that told Daniel he didn’t buy that, and then he jumped when someone knocked on his door. He went over and opened the door, told the caller he’d be right out then turned back to Daniel, closing the door again. “I have to go..”
“Paul, we’ve just had a really intense few days..” Daniel tried to explain their oddness away simply.
“I don’t have time to discuss this,” Paul argued as he lifted his bag into his hand. “I want to, believe me, but I don’t have time...” He said this as he backed towards the door. “I'll call you....” He gave Daniel a meaningful look. "I think we have to talk.."
Daniel remained where he was standing then felt bereft the moment Paul left the room.
With the bustle of the Infirmary quieter around lunchtime than other parts of the day Daniel decided to visit Jack during this time. As he entered the room he found Sam sitting by the bed, her head bowed as she read a book in her lap. At the sound of the door opening she looked up and smiled at Daniel.
“Any change?” he asked, closing the door behind him.
She shook her head as she got to her feet. “Do you want to sit with him a while?”
“I thought .. if you needed the break?”
Sam smiled. “I’d like one. I think I’m developing a flat ass from that damn chair.”
Daniel eyed the hard plastic seat. “You’d think with the amount of times we’re in here they’d have a lounge chair waiting for us.”
Sam laughed and patted her friend’s shoulder as she moved to the door. “I’ll be back after lunch, if that’s okay?”
Daniel shrugged. “I’ll stay a while. We’ll see.”
Sam gave him a beguiling smile then left the room, leaving Daniel alone with the unconscious man.
By inhaling a deep breath through his nose slowly Daniel steeled himself to sit by Jack’s side. He wasn’t sure if he could be here long enough to await Sam’s return but he’d stay as long as he could.
He rubbed his thighs nervously as he sat down, throwing a glance towards the bed. Jack’s chest rose and fell gently, the heartbeat seemed strong on the readout to the right of the bed. A tube ran under his nose and fed him oxygen, while more crisscrossed his exposed chest and ran down to the back of his hand. Tape held the butterfly tube in place on his hand, and more tape pressed down the gray hairs on his chest to adhesive the tubes to his body.
At that angle, Daniel could read the tags that remained around Jack’s neck. Jonathan Charles O’Neill. He never knew Jack’s second name before. It was probably why they named their son…
Jack groaned as he stirred. Daniel shot to his feet and was over him in a flash.
“Jack?”
The brown eyes opened slowly then clamped shut. “D’nel?” Jack’s mouth moved as if he needed a drink. Daniel hurried to the other side of the bed and carefully held the straw to Jack’s parched and cracked lips, letting the man sip slowly. He even told him to. “Take it easy, Jack. Small sips only.” He’d been in the infirmary enough to know that drill upon waking!
“W’happ’n’d?”
“Jacob rescued you and Teal’c in a Tok’Ra ship, don’t you remember?”
The eyes squeezed shut as Jack shook his head very slightly. “Teal’c?”
“He’s okay. He’s fine..” Daniel felt a smile burgeon on his lips. Jack was finally ‘okay’ again.
“You?” The whisper was soft and hoarse.
“Me?” He was surprised by the question. “I’m fine, too. You put us all through the ringer..”
“Car-ter?” Again, almost too soft to hear.
Daniel’s heart fell. This was where Jack was getting to, obviously. He just took the ‘polite’ way to get there.
“Uh, yeah, she’s okay. She was here for a few hours but I’ve just relieved her so she could get some lunch.”
“Good,” Jack mumbled before his eyes slid shut again. Daniel knew he’d fallen asleep again.
// Yes Jack, I’m looking after her for you!//
Daniel felt sour as he sat back onto his chair and folded his arms to wait for Jack to wake up again.
Sam looked freshly showered as she re-entered the infirmary. Her top was different too, she’d worn a green over-shirt earlier but now she was in a black t-shirt. Daniel didn’t wonder about the changes, instead he got to his feet, surprised that he’d remained there for that length of time, then said, “He woke once.”
“He did?” her blue eyes shone in the dim room. Daniel nodded.
“He asked after us all, in turn, then fell back to sleep again.”
Sam looked at him then took his hand in hers lightly to brush her thumb over his knuckles. “He’s probably been worrying about that in his sleep.” She met Daniel’s eyes. “He cares a lot.. for his team.”
Daniel saw the admiration in her eyes and simply nodded. He turned his face to look at the man in the bed as he mumbled, “More than he’s supposed to, so I hear.”
When he faced Sam again she frowned. Daniel didn’t say anything more before he made his excuse and left the room.
Daniel was in his lab working on the translations of the Ancient text form P3x 665 when Teal’c entered the room.
“DanielJackson,” he said, announcing his arrival.
“Hi Teal’c,” Daniel barely glanced up at his friend before returning to his work. “What’s up?”
“O’Neill is awake,” Teal’c said with a faint smile of happiness on his lips. Daniel glanced up then down again.
“Yeah? That’s good news.”
The large head tilted slightly. “You do not seem happy to hear this?”
“I’m busy, that’s all,” Daniel said, sighing as he rubbed out an incorrect translation and wrote the word again. He realized he might seem a little uncaring so he raised his face again and looked Teal’c in the eye when he said, “I was with him earlier today, actually. He woke then. We talked a bit..” He dipped his face again. He had too much on his mind. Jack. Paul. Jack. He worried that the man that shouldn't be falling for him actually was, and the one he wanted was none the wiser about him.
“He is asking for you again,” the Jaffa informed him.
Daniel’s head shot up and he frowned deeply. "He is?”
“Indeed. He said that you were gone when he woke up."
"I'm surprised he remembers," Daniel said icily, then pulled a face when Teal'c raised his brow. "Sorry," he muttered.
"He was most disappointed that you were not there when he came to, DanielJackson. He specifically asked me come and find you, and ask you to return to him.”
Daniel's frown deepened. "Why?" When Teal'c brow hitched again, Daniel altered that to, "Why .... didn’t they just call me?”
“Your phone appears to be out of order,” Teal’c said, glancing at the receiver that was laid on its side by the phone. Daniel put it back into the cradle.
“I, ah, I’m avoiding a call,” he explained.
“So it would appear,” Teal’c said as he turned with Daniel and they left the lab together. “Anyone in particular?”
“No,” Daniel lied. He couldn’t explain to Teal’c that he was avoiding a call from Paul Davis.
As Daniel came into the Infirmary he saw that Hammond and Janet were also around Jack’s bed. He stepped in quietly, not drawing attention to himself as he watch the Doctor rid Jack of some of his superfluous tubes. As she ripped some tape off the man’s chest he gagged and gritted his teeth, complaining against the pain.
“Come on Colonel, you’ve had worse things done to you.”
“Not lately, OUCH!” He rubbed his tender flesh.
Hammond leaned towards Sam and said quietly, “At least he sounds like the old Colonel.” Carter smiled and nodded before straightening up.
“Where the hell is Daniel? Can’t that man take a damn order, for cry..”
“I’m here,” Daniel stepped around from behind Hammond. “Heard you wanted to talk to me?”
Jack looked at him and his expression became neutral. “I hear it was your idea that saved us out there.”
Daniel looked towards Sam and Hammond and they both beamed back at him. He looked at Jack again. “We all tried different..”
“Well, I wanted to say Thanks,” Jack said, then held his hand up. Daniel clasped his hand in Jack’s and enjoyed the tight squeeze in return. “I owe you my life, buddy.”
Daniel felt like his heart might explode at that moment and he blinked away the mist threatening his eyes before he shrugged and said, “It’s not like you wouldn’t do the same thing for me.”
“Yeah,” Jack said, sounding like he’d meant it. Daniel was aware they were still touching so he released his grip only to be surprised that Jack held his still for a moment longer, then he lowered his hand to the bed again.
“SG-1 is officially on Stand Down until Colonel O’Neill is back on his feet again,” Hammond announced.
Daniel heard the words but he hadn’t taken his gaze off Jack, nor had Jack shifted his from him.
“Thank you, Sir,” Sam said on behalf of them all. As Hammond left the room Sam and Teal’c stepped up to the side of the bed. “You don’t think you could stretch this out for a week, do you Sir?”
“Why’s that?” Jack asked her.
“It’s my birthday next week. It would be nice to be spending it here on Earth..”
Jack smiled at her and then shrugged. “I’ll see what I can do for you, Carter.”
Daniel felt betrayed again by Jack’s earlier attention. He watched the interaction with the other two and felt like he was intruding. He glanced at Teal’c who seemed unaffected by the actions of their team mates.
“I have to go,” Sam finally announced as she reached for her book and scooped it into her arms. “I’ll call by later.”
“You’ll go out and get a life, Carter, and that’s an order!”
Sam laughed. “Sure, Sir.”
Daniel gave her a friendly nod as she passed by him then he turned back to watch Teal’c step up to the bed. Jack smiled at his friend with such admiration that Daniel felt uncomfortable and looked down at his feet instead. He heard their murmured words, but tried not to listen. The words shared between two men who thought they were about to lose their lives together were not for others to hear.
Soon he felt the heavy weight of Teal’c's hand on his shoulder as the Jaffa passed by him. Teal’c’s smile was unlike one Daniel had ever seen and he thought it had to do with relief of being alive. When Teal’c spoke he confirmed those thoughts. “I, too, owe my life to you, DanielJackson.”
Daniel smiled and nodded. “I’m glad you’re both home, safe and sound.” Teal’c bowed majestically then stepped from the room.
Daniel raised his eyes and saw the battered man in the bed. His breath caught in the back of his throat as he viewed Jack, safe and home where he belonged.
“C’mere, Danny,” Jack said, holding his hand up and beckoning his friend with his fingers. Daniel did as he was asked and moved to Jack’s side. The patient held his arms wide and at first Daniel frowned then he leaned down and allowed Jack to hug him.
For a man on death’s door twenty-four hours ago Jack had some strength in his embrace. He chortled into Daniel’s ear, sending a flurry of tingling sensations throughout the younger man. The hug ended abruptly as Jack pushed him back by his shoulders to look at him. “Thanks, Space Monkey.”
Daniel felt a shiver run down his spine. The last time Jack had cause to call him Space Monkey was the only time Daniel had gotten close to telling him how he felt for him. As he lay on the floor of Apophis’ ship and looked up into Jack’s concerned eyes he wanted to tell him how he felt about him, how much he cared… but he couldn’t. He still couldn’t.
His nose crinkled as he smiled brightly at Jack though. It felt good to be close again. “Do you want some company?” he asked. “Shall I stay?”
“Yeah,” Jack said, a gentle smile lit his eyes as he watched Daniel pull a chair to the side of the bed. “That’ll be nice.”
Daniel sat, smiling at Jack and feeling like everything might be okay again.
End of part nine
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Rights held by Nessessitee –Jan 2003