ARTICLES
- Peace Thoughts
- When Solitude Is Needed
- Cooping With a Failed Romance
- The Spell of Romantic Love
- Keeping The True of Friendships

POEMS
- The Love We Need
- Aversion

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Romantic Love-A Wonderful Feeling

FALLING IN LOVE or being in love can be a very pleasurable feeling. But if the wedded pair will bank too much on romantic love, the power of sex attraction can be the dominating role. And if this happened, the results may not be very pleasurable and marriages will fail to gain true happiness. Truly, romantic love is a particular thing that cannot be neglected in marriage. And keeping a balance view of it may end to a good result.

However, romantic love tells us that it implies emotion that has little relation to things as they actually are, results more from one's imagination, and base on the attraction.

Romantic love, being based on the attraction that members of the opposite sex have for each other, may be said to be a chemical reaction; that is, due to the power of the sex hormones.

Indeed, the Creator implanted in the sexes a strong desire for each other so that the human race might keep on being fruitful and becoming many. He also counsels man to exercise self-control in regard to it. Romantic love can be served as entrance to the happy relationship or marriage life only if it is kept in its place. But what are the circumstances when one is under the spell of romantic love?

Under The Spell Of Romantic Love

When one is under the spell of romantic love, there are situations that are expected to happen. There are problems that can arise like frustrations. Romantic love causes young folks to have unrealistic expectations. It often causes them to think that all their problems will be solved by romance. But more likely than not, romance will multiply those problems.

Romantic love causes young folks to expect too much. In marriage, when they find that they are not realizing their ideal they tend to view it as a failure.

However, humans do not have perfect personalities. They cannot exercise perfect judgment, so how can they expect a perfect marriage?

Romantic love, being made to seem so desirable, at times tempts young folks to be dishonest, further leading to frustration. The young woman may resort to ever so many devices, such as saying what she knows he wants to hear instead of what she actually thinks. And, not content with hair dyeing and makeup, she may also resort to extra padding to give her an appealing figure. On the other hand, the young man may be saddled with debt and not let her know, or he may claim to be earning more than he actually is earning.

Youth tends to overlook the fact that romantic love is not necessarily true affection. In fact, it is more likely to be selfish than unselfish, although the individual may not be aware of it himself. When one is under the spell of romantic love, he can easily masquerade as sincere affection when it is really infatuation. What is the distinction? Infatuation is a strong and unreasoning attachment, especially to something unworthy of attachment. Infatuation generally is based on strong physical attraction, to the disregard of other essential factors. And beware of this case.

That romantic love can lead to the pitfall of infatuation. Yes, infatuation thinks only of the pleasures of the present or immediate future. It is extremely shortsighted. It has been described as 'haste to mate,' and at best is only temporary.

True affection is not shortsighted. It takes a long-range view of matters and is willing to deny itself lesser things today so that it might have greater, better things tomorrow.

A lot of people believed in a saying that 'love is blind.' But in fact, love that is guided by principle is not blind. It sees qualities and possibilities that others do not see.

It is infatuation that is blind. It sees only what it wants to see, it doesn't like to look at reality. When you're infatuated with a person, you think that everything they do is just perfect.

Yet, there are many persons who would strongly disagree. Though recognizing infatuation as a strong and unreasonable attachment toward someone, they tell that what they feel is the 'real thing,' love. Many would often view love as a mysterious feeling or incident that takes hold of you. For them, there is no such feeling in the world like the seventh heaven of 'falling in love.' Another sign of infatuation is that it overlooks the counsel or wishes of others. A person with true affection is eager to listen to others.

Concerning romantic love, some says that love is a fraud; it is deceitful, because it is temporary. No one stays in love in the romantic sense. Is "romantic experiences" infatuation or real love?

Most people would describe their current experience as love rather than infatuation. Indeed, during a romance, it was viewed as love, but in due time, it may clearly seen as infatuation-a temporary, vanishing feeling. Though, during those past experiences, they did realize it was infatuation.

Undoubtedly, infatuation is a cause for a high divorce rate. In view of that, persons need help to determine the difference between love and infatuation. It would be best to seek the wise advice of others who have your best interests at heart, such as your true friends, and of course, your parents.

Also, adhere closely to the only infallible source of advice-the Holy Bible. In that way, you can avoid the dangers and frustrations that so many had suffered.

More Than Just A Romantic Love

For good, observed that Bible, the Word of God, does not criticize romantic love in itself. By listening to the Word of God, you will spare the disillusionments, the disappointments, and the frustrations that so often result from romantic love. More than that, it helps us to understand the proper view of romantic love.

Romantic love can be something beautiful and may be needed to a happy marriage. That is, only if it is accompanied with reason, self-control and good judgment.

Many will agree that even without romantic love, such vital qualities as good intention, self-control, and discretion are more likely to result in happiness. Even many believed that romantic love is a way to happy marriage, but it certainly is not the only way to happiness in marriage.

The Bible speaks approvingly of proper, mature romantic love. Such romantic love can contribute to happiness only when it is controlled; and, to control it, we need the love based on principle. But you may observe that Bible writers put the emphasis on agápe love. Even when they discussed the subject of love in marriage, they always used the word agápe. In their married life Christians were to show agápe love.

It is this agápe love that a couple vow to give each other when exchanging the marriage vows. The romantic love the couple feels for each other on their wedding day will deepen as time passes.

The romantic love is beautiful and a great help in making adjustments to married life. Unselfish compassion toward each other should be a way of life, that is, more than just a romantic love.

Building Up A Love That Last

In our present unpleasant situation in the world today, almost everyone will agree that the world needs love, a genuine love-a love that never fails.

Unfortunately, today that kind of love appears to be fading. Therefore, what really matters now is our showing love, a vital factor needed for lasting relationship and happiness. And the kind of love that will bring the best results, is a love based on right principles, as well as being warmth and affectionate.

As described by the Bible, a relationship built on genuine love will surely stand the test of time. Genuine love is "long-suffering" and "does not look for its own interests." (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

It is not self-centered. When you are really in love you care just as much for the other person's welfare and happiness as you do your own. Remember, infatuation doesn't last long, then it fades. Genuine love grows stronger with time and becomes the perfect bond of union. FIN