Ian just looks happy here.
He's ALL IAN!!!
|
***Cards***
We've probably all been in the situation where we're sitting in class, trying to finally get some peace and quiet, and thinking about unicorns and kittens in sunflower fields, when all of a sudden your hear "Uhhhh, you guys wanna play some cards"? GUESS WHO!?!?! It's IAN! Ian enjoys cards I think. Probably more than anything in his life. Ian is constantly playing cards, and has made quite the poker name for himself in the Paschal arena. He started poker about the middle of sophomore year, and continues playing avidly. Well Ian, may all your cards be live, and your pots be MONSTERS!!! (*giggle*)
***Competitive***
Besides losing at games that involve intelligence, Ian doesn't lose very much. He's actually quite the winner. Quite frankly, I would be scared to see Ian lose at something. He's actually punched me in the face at a public facility before and gave me a bloody nose. What kind of a person would do something like that? Huh? I'd hate to be the guy who ends up marrying him� (Ba boom boom clash). But jokes aside, Ian is very good at everything for some reason, and wins a lot and everything else. This section was a bad idea, but the point is that Ian=Dominating Force to be reckoned with. GRRRRR!
***Dewayne***
The "Bowser" of the Mario kingdom of Ian would have to be Ian's step dad, Dewayne. Dewayne is like 4 cups of badass mixed with 3 cups of Girls Gone Wild, mixed with a thorough and seemingly constant supply of alcohol, but in the end, he's a father to us all. When we have questions, he has answers. When we take a licking, he keeps us ticking. When we're hungry, he lets us TASTE THE RAINBOW!!! And to borrow a line from Spiderman II, "I believe there is a hero in all of us"... and that Hero is Dewayne.
***Rich***
Mathematically, Ian should not be rich. It really doesn't make any sense. I don't believe that I am good at math at all, but money minus a whole shitload of money shouldn't make you have like a gazillion dollars. Right? First of all, I don't even think that anyone in Ian's family has a job. Second of all, they wear expensive clothes. And last of all, they have a house bigger than Dr. Frikin Wiley's castle!!! DO YOU KNOW HOW BIG THAT IS!?!?!?! Jesus would be jealous� that's how big. They don't have any of Dr. Wiley's robots though. Suckers.
|
