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Have You Seen The Ace Of Spades Lately?     December 14th, 2003 • Written By: Hach

Well, well, well, what a day. Things gradually change alot when things actually happen in news. Thus if you haven't heard the big story. The Number One Wanted Man Ever in the recent ten, twenty years in American history. The man we have all grown to coughlovecough (alright hate), has been caught and captured. Sadly, with his one phone call he called me and wanted me to post the transcript of our conversation here on Hachland. Thus without further ado, here is the full transcript: Hach: Hello? Ace Of Spade: (translated) HELP! HELP! Hach: Who is this? A.O.S.: (translated) Me Hach. It's me. Hach: Matt? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: Jimmy? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: AJ? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: Bubba? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: Ryan? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: Richardo? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: Chris? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: Kenny? A.O.S.: (translated) No, me. Hach: George? A.O.S.: (translated) Not that son of a bitch. Hach: Oh, it's you. What's up? A.O.S.: (translated) I need your help. Hach: Oh, what ya need? A.O.S.: (translated) They keep asking me about these weapons of mass destruction. Do you remember where I put them? Hach: Hmm... Did you name one Gilbert Gottfried? A.O.S.: (translated) Why you gotta treat me like this? Hach: Like what? A.O.S.: (translated) Do you even know who I am? Hach: Do you know who I am? A.O.S.: (translated) Yes, your the fucking man, you we're the official website of Iraq. Hach: Wow, that really doesn't shock me. So what do you want to know? A.O.S.: (translated) Can you get me out of this mess and say I didn't do anything Hach: How would I do that? A.O.S.: (translated) Say I was easily influenced. Like say my real father is Hitler, yeah, Hitler. Hach: Why don't I just say you learned your mayhemic ways from me. A.O.S.: (translated) Yeah, if you think that'll work. Hach: You moron it wouldn't work! You attacked Iran or whatever that fucking country was back in 1980. I wasn't even born yet. A.O.S.: (translated) Oh, oh, well, I have 750,000 dollars US. Just make something up. Hach: Alright, whatever, I gotta take a shit. A.O.S.: (translated) Okay, but you'll help right? Hach: Yeah, I'll think of something. Then I hung up the phone with this Ace Of Spade, this one of a kind man. And I looked up onto the television and saw a picture similar to this one: I later called the Philidaphiale Police and told them this kid Matt is really Saddam. Later that day I got a phone call from Matt, he didn't ask me to post the transcripts on Hachland. So I didn't and Matt is going to be hung tomorrow at High Noon. Thus the morale of the story is, always sell out. Hahaha... But really, congradulations to us, and thus dudes that caught Saddam. Hopefully we will finally end these depressing years of a tyrant. Because hey, I know I hate him. Just because it took so much time away from my favorite shows. In Other News.... Green Bay gets a win, while Vickings and Seahawks both lose, thus leading to a 8-6 record for all three.. Making Green Bay tied with Vickings for Division lead and looking like a dead set in the playoffs. Let's go Pack!

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