Fravas the Bar(d)tender in: Fruity Martini Twist.
Stage: We are in a cheap pub. 9 stools are at the bar, they are all taken but the one closest to the door. The streetlights outside are getting in through the windows, and smoke is quite visible everywhere. In the background is flooded by conversations over relaxed men after a hard days work.
Fravas is the bartender at this bar, and working late. He has a monopoly right now, since his bar is the only one open so late (or early) in the day.
Enter: Frat boy and 2 of his jock friends.
Frat boy: Jumping into the only empty stool, looks quite energetic. �Hey man, let�s get few beers for me and my buds eh?�
Fravas: �Yeah, I�m going to need some I.D. on you kids.�
Frat Boy: �Dude, don�t be a little bitch alright? You�re just like the rest of them. Here,� Flings his �OVER 21 I.D.�. �Now go get me a beer alright?�
Jock Friend 1: �Dude! Ha-ha! You totally showed that guy your I.D. HAHAA!�
Jock Friend 2: �Woo WOOO!�
Fravas: Tired, and now insulted, Fravas turns around to get a Bud Light, pours it in a glass, has it watered down some more, and serves it to Frat Boy.
Frat Boy: Drinks one sip. He looks at Fravas, and pours the drink over the counter.
Fravas: �Godamn it!�
Jock Friend 2: �Woo WOOO!�
Frat Boy: �Listen, I didn�t ask for some sissy flavored water! Get me that beer, and I get you money for those hookers you like, that�s why you�re here isn�t it?�
Fravas: �Hey, this is my bar okay? If you want to get drunk tonight, keep an eye on your damn attitude.�
Frat Boy: �Okay man, just get me my beer.�
Jock Friend 1: �Dude, you totally told him off! HAHA!�
Fravas: Goes about and starts to round up a drink.
Jock Friend 1: �Totally awesome game man, you totally kicked David�s ass tonight!�
Frat Boy: �Fuck yeah I did, if only that moron Steve learned to throw, I would have made it to the second down!�
Jock Friend 1: �Totally, Steve is such a fag! HAHA!�
Jock Friend 2: �Totally. Haha!�
Fravas: Returns and places in front of Frat Boy, a Fruity Martini, complete with paper umbrella, cherry, and flower napkin. �There you go babe, that�s six fifty.�
Frat Boy: �And what the fuck is this SHIT?!�
Jock Friend 2: �DUDE!�
Fravas: �Calm down there babe, I�m looking out for you, that�s all. I get allot of guys in here a day, and I tell what you boys want.�
Frat Boy: �Yeah, I WANT a fucking beer!�
Fravas: �You see, that�s where you�re wrong. You don�t want a hardcore man�s beer.
Frat Boy: �Well I don�t want THIS!� and backhands the drink, shattering it all over the counter.
Fravas: �With a bitch slap like that one, I think you want more than that. I don�t normally see allot of you gays in here, but I�m just trying to serve you best I can.�
Jock Friend 1: �Holy crap dude. Do you know who he is?�
Fravas: �I know WHAT he is, and from the sound of it you seem to be P.M.S.ing too. Now I don�t want blood all over my bar okay, so if you ladies don�t mind, I have a Tampax dispenser in the women�s bathroom.�
Jock Friend 2: �Oh my GOD dude! This guy is such a FAG!�
Fravas: �Hey there girlfriend, don�t get your panties in a bun. I don�t discriminate here, and I don�t want you to start a pillow fight. Just calm down.�
Frat Boy: Jumps out of his stool and starts screaming: , �You�re ASKING for a fucking FIGHT you fucking HOMO!�
Fravas: Remaining calm �Alright there, I see there is nothing I can give you guys to calm down. I won�t stick my dick inside you. Sorry, but I just won�t�
Frat Boy: Turns red with rage.
Jock Friend: Turns red with rage.
Jock Friend: Turns red with rage.
Fravas: �Aw jeez, looks like your going to start crying, look, how about I get you a free beer, on the house?�
Frat Boy: �FUCK YES! You get us TWO, or I�ll kick your ass and smash your shity fag homo bar!�
Fravas: �Okay okay, let me go get them alright? I really don�t want any trouble.�
Frat Boy: �Man, the ONLY reason I�m not kicking your ass is because you�re the only fag bar oppend that hasn�t banned me!�
Jock Friend 2: �That�s right dude! We get BANNED from bars because we�re BADASSES who KILL Faggots!�
Fravas: Grabs a six pack of Coors under the bar, and hands it to them all. �Alright, it�s free, so you�re calmed down now?�
Jock Friend 1: �Sweet dude! Free beer!�
Frat Boy: �Alright man, just don�t screw with us. Thanks.� Pulls a can off and starts drinking with his friends.
Jock Friend 1: Pulls a can off and starts drinking.
Jock Friend 2: Pulls a can off and says �Man, we should kick people!�
Fravas: Going to the bar stools occupied by a few hardcore bickers guys, hands them a Fruity Martini twist.
Big Black Bicker Dude 1: �What the fuck is this shit?�
Fravas: �The homosexual Frat boys by the door send you their compliments. I told them I didn�t think you were gay, but they insisted they could �turn you over�.
Big Black Bicker Dude 1: �Is that the fuck so?� Gets up off his stool, and storms off to the Frat boys, ready to kick some ass.
Big Black Bicker Dude 2: Gets up off his stool, and storms off to the Frat boys, ready to kick some ass.
Big Black Bicker Dude 3: Gets up off his stool, and storms off to the Frat boys, ready to kick some ass.
Big Black Bicker Dude 4: Gets up off his stool, and storms off to the Frat boys, ready to kick some ass.
Big Black Bicker Dude 5: Gets up off his stool, and storms off to the Frat boys, ready to kick some ass.
Fravas: Looks on as the Big Black Bicker Dudes go ape shit all over the faggots. Does not care about the broken chairs, and feels much better.
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