| She was still young; she still had her whole life ahead of her. But it felt as though her life was coming to an end right there, right in front of her very eyes. He said he still loved her, but yet he walked away without the slightest hesitation. Watching him get into his car and drive away, she kept waiting to see the brake lights, and perhaps even the reverse lights. But it never happened. She watched until she could see the car no more. She was watching empty space hoping... longing for it to all be a bad dream. That she wouldn't have to leave the place that had been more of a home than she had ever felt before. She loved that old house; she loved the home that they made out of it. But yet, she knew she would be the one to have to leave. She loved the dining room set they had bought; it fit so perfectly in the dining room. She loved how her pictures looked hanging in the hallway. She loved the sight of their wedding pictures set atop of the formal fireplace. The tears streamed down her face in the form of a never-ending stream. For every teardrop, there was another to take its place. She sat there looking at their wedding picture, almost wishing that her tears would wash away the memory along with the picture. She loved him more than life itself, but still her life would go on without him. How would she do it? How would she go on? She would find a way.... Nina was only 26 years of age and already had a successful career. She had a nice apartment and a reliable life... a predictable life. Two years had passed since her marriage disintegrated before her. He took the house, moved his precious little slut into her home and never thought twice about it. Her life had gone on without him, she came to understand that the way she thought things existed within their marriage, was nothing more than a figment of her imagination. She was over him, but she would never be over what he did to her. Even after two years she still wondered what had gone wrong and if he ever really loved her; if he ever regretted loosing her. At the same time, she understood that these answers she would never know, and that it was not worth her time and concentration to dwell on it. She moved on, she met someone else, she even fell in love. Although she could never be capable of loving anyone to the extent that she has loved him. She would not allow herself to be consumed to that degree ever again, to let anyone that close to her, to let anyone hurt her. Part of her died that night when he drove off. She used to be carefree and always happy, now she was reserved and always cautious. Perhaps a small price to pay to never have to relive the pain she felt that night. She loved her boyfriend with every bit of her remaining being; he even wanted to get married. But she was not ready for that, she needed more time to have her own life before bringing someone else into it again, before she could open up again. Nina had reached her goal to become a partner in one of the most prestigious law firms in the city; and the youngest partner the firm had ever established. All of those long nights had finally paid off. Her goal was to someday own her own practice and not have to deal with the snobby senior partners looking down their nose at her. But that would come in time. For the past week she had been dealing with a divorce case very similar to her own. Except this time she was representing the cheating spouse. She absolutely detested the thought of having to portray this man as a descent husband, but it was her job and obligation and she would do it if it killed her. However, despite her intentions to move on with her life and never again think about her ex, this case brought back a lot of memories that she would have just assumed kept locked up. It was almost as if he just wouldn't let her go. He wasn?t holding onto her physically, but mentally, emotionally. Time lessons the pain, but it does not diminish it totally. She was scared, he had forever touched her life and she wished she could erase it. Every time things got better he was there, or a reminder of him, to ruin it for her. She was tired of her emotions being held captive by this awful man she once loved. She just wanted him to let go. It was a cold Friday night, and she was working late at the office. All of the lights were out except the one shining from her office. Even the tropical fish in the huge fish tank that sat in the waiting room were ready for some slumber. She was trying to compose an e-mail to her client's apposing council when her eyes went blurry and the monitor split into two screens. She shook her head as if to shake the drowsiness away. When she looked up at the clock it was already 10:23pm. She decided to save it until Monday morning; after a 15 hour workday, it would have to wait. All she could think about was going home to a nice hot bubble bath and curling up in bed with the man that brought joy into her life. She slid into her coat, grabbed her briefcase, and headed for the door, shutting off the light behind her and making sure the main office doors were locked. She walked down the long hall of this immaculate building; the cherry wood trim and brass light fixtures once intimidated her, but no more. She was too tired to pay much attention. She walked down the six flights of stairs to the basement entry of the parking garage. She was beginning to think twice about her decision not to call for security to escort her out, but quickly shook away the feeling as paranoia. The garage was nothing but cold concrete and dim globe lights that barely provided any illumination. She hated that garage, it felt so cold, maybe not temperature wise, but cold all the same. It reminded her of a low budget horror film that ends with a slim blonde girl screaming. She caught sight of her shiny red car and kept a steady walking pace; they always say that burglars won't touch confident people who are aware of their surrounding. Whoever the person named 'They' is she did not know. Suddenly she saw something out of the corner of her eye. As she turned and looked, she saw a man standing beside a car off to her right. She could barely see him in the shadows of the poorly lit garage, but figured maybe it was a janitor or someone coming in for their shift. In the time it took her to look towards her car and look back to the man, he had cut the distance between them in half without making the slightest sound. She stopped and yelled "Can I help you?" while squinting her eyes to try to make out the physical characteristics of this shadowed stranger. The man did not say a word; as her eyes focused in the darkness she could make out a strong jaw line, goatee, short hair, then suddenly she saw the face of her ex-husband. He was just standing there, staring at her with a slight smile, as if they were long lost friends. She turned and hurried to her car, but before she could put the key in the lock he was right behind her. "Stop, I just want to talk Nina." "All talk no action, nothing's changed... Leave me alone." "Now that's now true. I talked a lot, I always told you I love you, and I meant it every time." She winced at hearing those words, wishing she could blink and he would disappear like a bad dream. "What do you want Joseph? And why here of all places?" "I'm sick Nina. Real Sick. And I'm trying to make peace with my wrongs. I wanted to apologize for everything I've ever done to you. The things I put you through... I'm sorry." "Me too...... I gotta get home." She reached for the door handle but his hand caught hers. "It's time for you to come home with me Nay." "You haven't called me that in years and you won't start now. I am going home, to MY home. My home isn't with you and never will be. Now please move." Nina said while trying her best to keep her composure. "Well I was hoping you would see it my way, but I didn't expect you to I guess... You're coming with me one way or another, in life or in death." Joseph pulled out a steak knife and displayed it against the dim garage lighting. "I was hoping you wouldn't make me choose for you though." All in the matter of a second, Nina's mind was rushed with thoughts. Thoughts of disbelief, thoughts of confusion; she even noticed how the steak knife had an uncanny resemblance to the same ones she used to use to chop up the onions when she made him a fancy meal. Maybe it was the same one, she wouldn't be surprised. He never was one for originality. But she was not about to become his victim for the second time in her life. Every since she first walked into the garage, her left hand had been firmly maintained in the pocket of her trench coat. Instinctively, she pulled her hand from her coat and pointed the little 38 special, the one that her boyfriend had given her for protection on late nights such as this one, at this man who had already taken so much from her. Without even realizing it she squeezed the trigger and suddenly... the threat was gone. She looked down to see the smoke rising from the barrel, trying to soak up everything that had just transpired. She looked down to see her ex-husband lying on the ground, unconscious but far from dead. He had passed out from pain, the pain of having a hole punched through his groin. He would never hurt another woman the way he had hurt her; he would see his last day soon enough, but not by her hand. Through her shock, she had not seen the security officer enter through the stairwell door and come running to her aid. He had witnessed the entire incident on the security cameras and the police sirens were already wailing around the corner. She was safe from him... forever more. The sickness that Joseph was talking about was prostrate cancer; the bullet punctured the tumor, spreading the cancer further, faster. Within six months Joseph was laid to rest, never to hurt another being again. That night Nina went home to the protective arms of her boyfriend and 6 months later they were married. She would no longer let Joseph have any reign in her life. The brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past, you can't go on well in life until you let go of your past failures and heartaches. NOTICE: All works on this site are the expressed property of Melinda Bush. No stories/poems may be removed from this site without the expressed permission of the author. |
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| Never Let Her Go |
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