[ Dwelling Of The Doorknobs ]

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Definition: Weird creation created by the weird

Quote from [insert name here]:

"Everything is tamable, even big cats, and yet the female side of the human race is wild and rugged (untamable)"

| EDIT [ Brittikins ]: As a female, I resent being called ‘untamable’. The fact that it even is implied that we should be tamable offends me. TAKE THAT [insert name here]! Anyway, I would also like to point out that you say ‘everything’ is tamable, but females aren’t, which means that we aren’t part of ‘everything’ which is somewhat odd. |

The moon is not made of green cheese. Nor is it made of Colby or Cheddar. It is in fact made of mouldy calci-trim milk. So here is an important piece of information regarding your life and how you live it... IF YOU EVER GO TO THE MOON TAKE YOUR OWN CHEESE - [ Nikkikins ]

If you think before you speak someone will get in their joke first

Lots of, hmm not love umm, lots of utter dislike (JOKING)

Faith- Believing in something when common sense tells you not to.

Life lessons with [ Brittikins ]

Except I have no life so my lesson aren’t exactly very good. Instead, I cancel my lessons and will write down the best conversations. I.e.: how's your PC?

Suggested Meanings:

Perpetual Corpulentivity/Corpulence Pizza Cutter

Paranormal Cucumber                      Priceless Cutlery

Painful Constipation                          Plush Carpet

Paper Cut                                          Pink Caterpillars

Pensive Claustrophobia                    Photo Copier

Pneumonia Catcher                          Private Conversation

Platinum Contacts                             Palomino Cowboy

Pink Chickens                                   Public Crap

Pusillanimous Children

So add these into your Private/Public Conversations at random moments just to spice things up.

I know the voice inside my head isn’t real but it sure has some good ideas.

My imaginary friend and I think you have serious mental issues

Bombing for peace is like fucking for virginity

The ‘We Love Neville Support Group’ has now opened for hopeless Neville fanatics. Here are some scenarios that may put you off being a Neville groupie.

YOU: “Yelling ‘Go Neville’ on the sidelines”

A REAL NEVILLE: “does a Joey off friends”

YOU: “AH! Neville is my imaginary boyfriend! I don’t want a real boyfriend!”

NEVILLE: “punches A REAL NEVILLE”

You: Shot Neville!

A REAL NEVILLE: “Wha-? ‘Mutters’ CRAZY TAITA PEOPLE!”

The people who laugh at my dancing just can’t hear the imaginary song in my head.

When Mexican people do a Mexican Wave, do they put down their tacos or throw them in the air?

A limerick written by [ Brittikins ]

There once was a girl named Lizzie

her hair was not at all frizzy

she was pissed off in drama

with a girl named Ariana

and this made her head dizzy

Banana’s in pyjamas are coming all beware,

Banana’s in pyjamas will take you to their lair,

Banana’s in pyjamas are chasing teddy bears

Coz they want to try to kill them unawares!

Movies that would be VERY interesting:

The Incredible Hunk/of Pork- [ Brittikins ] Porn/k Movie

The Best Ways to Kill your Enemy without Getting Caught

Osama Bin Laden-The REAL Story

Different Positions (in rugby)

Jumping the Fence

Coming out of the closet: World Champions at hide and go seek

Save the Last Branch: A plea from Green Peace

There’s something about Jerry

Suicide Bombers Demonstration

The Necklace (the sequel to that classic movie!)

The lady and the TRAMP

101 [Damn]ations

Little Red in da Hood

Robbing da Hood

The Dumb and the Dumb ass

Exterminator: Down with Bugs

Charlottes World Wide Web

The Lion Queen: Transvestites Unleashed

New York Minute: Cost $5.00

South Auckland Minute: There goes your car

Taita Minute: There goes your shoes

Lord of the Pingas: The Asian Invasion

Americas High

Americas High-The Bedding

Homo Bound- Two dogs (male) fall in love

The Hobo and the Yeast: A homeless guys rise to fame

The Mummy Returns (but has Daddy moved on?)

Ivan’s Hoes

SHUTUP EWES (the sequel to silence of the lambs)

Random Thoughts

Eggs do not bounce on concrete

Poos are sometimes green

Chocolate fish can’t swim

The Milky Way is not made of milk

People aren’t made to be shot

Medieval is not a star wars episode

Pet cats don’t always land on their feet

You don’t go fishing to catch chocolate fish

Pretzels burn your eyes

Indians are Asians too

Basketball is not soccer or any other sport

Southern Irish are people too-but only just!

Short people are funny to look at

People who wear glasses are in no way funny (except those big ugly ones)

Tables have feelings too

If we ate eggs with dead chicks in them, it would be kinda GROSS!

If you drop a nest full of eggs, they break and the chicks die.  :(

Being horny while naked towards total strangers in public is okay...

...but only in the South of France or Southern Ireland

Being obese should be a punishable crime... (according to [ Brittikins ] coz she’s a bitch!!)

Chairs hate it when you fart on them

Chairs have feelings too

[ Brittikins ] isn’t (and never will be) a bitch, on account of the fact that she’s a cross dressing male

Surprisingly, no one has yet vacuumed up moon dust