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My LiveJournal word count:

the 130   he 25   be 14 to 113   with 23   has 14 and 97   have 22   going 14 a 84   this 22   at 14 i 84   just 21   when 13 of 75   his 21   been 13 it 44   me 20   now 13 my 41   really 19   car 12 for 39   out 18   she 12 that 39   as 18   from 12 in 35   they 17   all 12 you 32   not 16   no 12 is 30   i'm 16   your 12 on 29   but 16   it's 11 was 26   had 16   up 11 so 25   were 15   he's 11

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LJ Word Count (Beta!) by

What do the LOTR men think of you? by ladyearwentari
Name (LJ or Real)
Viggo said your	cool
Orlando says the sex was	exhasting, you did it anywhere and everywhere
Elijah imagined	you in fish nets
Sean B could not	figure out your weirdness
Karl freaked out when	he saw you in bed with Viggo
Dom thinks you look	sexy
Billy noticed	you stole his kilt
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

Ow

I got to sleep late Thursday afternoon and when I got up to turn the alarm clock off, I guess my leg was asleep and I fell right on my ass. I fell on my legs in a weird way so that they were bent behind me and my left leg has been killing me for the past 3 days. :(

It's official. I suck.

So I didn't get the job. :( I don't understand it though. The person she gave it to was moved to the day shift because she constantly called out on the 3p to 11p shift which she is now supervisor of. She's got so many points she's in danger of losing her job. I don't understand why you would put someone like that in management position. It's beyond me. At any rate I just can't work this shift anymore. I'm going to ask her if she can move me to at least 6pm to 230a for the time being. And I'm going to continue to send out my resume. If it was supposed to happen, it would have. I just feel like a lot of the reason I feel so stuck in my life, is primarily this job. I just don't feel like I'm going anywhere here.

I feel just crappy like myself as well. Brad came home and wanted to be all lovey dovey and when I pushed him away, he just started berating me and saying really hurtful things. He knows what to say to make me feel like shit. Stupid me, I let it get to me.

"It sucks royal shit!"

I've about had it with that piece of shit car!! I went to the gas station up the street a while ago, parked outside, forgot to turn my lights off I guess, wasn't in there for more than 3 minutes, tops, and went back outside and the fucking thing wouldn't start! I noticed the lights were really dim on the way into work tonight but come on!

One of my co-workers came up to get me and give me a jump. She couldn't open the hood of her car so she pushed me into a parking spot and we went back to work. I forgot to tell the employees of the store that I would be back up at 7am, so I hope it isn't towed.

Brad bought Cabin Fever this weekend. What a strange film. Pancakes? What the hell was that about? Total mind fuck.

There's also something about Maggie Gylenhall that makes her undeniably smokin'.

Wish me luck :)

I have a interview for supervisor today at 1:30pm. Not really all that nervous. The only thing holding me back, I feel, is the fact that she would have to replace me on the 11p to 7am shift, and that's really hard to do.

I don't understand people

I talked to this Denzel guy (see Porn...oh, wait erotica post) on Thursday morning and asked him to give his home phone number to Richard, to give to Bessie (my co-worker) so that I could call him and we would make plans to go out since I didn't have a pen and paper on me. He said okay. Here is it, Friday night, and I still haven't heard from Bessie (she's been off for the past two days). I paged her a little while ago and apparently she was asleep so I couldn't really understand what she was saying but it was something to the effect of, "Richard, didn't get a chance to remind Denzel about it and didn't feel comfortable giving out his home phone number.."

Fine, whatever. I was really only doing this crap to get them off my back. They were bugging me non-stop to talk to him on the phone or come out with them and him and blah, blah, blah.

Should I or shouldn't I?

So the general manager has posted for the 3-11p supervisor position. The only other person that has applied is someone who's new and pretty much sucks at this job, if that's even possible. This job is so simple, a child could do it.

But anyway, since there's very little competition, I feel I'd almost certainly get the job. But the fact that no one else has applied..feels like a sign to me. Either way, I'm going to do it.

Brad has decided to take the low road and just be an ass in general and leave me with the new car, all 377$ a month of it. So I'll really need the extra pay.

Porn...oh, wait erotica -- w00t!

Dwayne is such a sweetie. He gave me his old account that has been paid through until the end of May over at SuicideGirls.com because he knew I couldn't afford my own right now. So I think it's pretty safe to say how I spent my morning. :p

I've decided to ask to guy that my co-worker is trying to set me up with out for Saturday night. Just to get it out of the way. Now I have to think of something to do. Blind date. Scary.

Oh yeah, I'm moving my weblog to www.geocities.com/didisaythat12.

I'm so frustrated I could scream

I live with the most selfish, sadistic, ingrate there is. I can't believe that after three months of him sitting on his ass he's going to complain about how much he's got to pay in bills now that we have a new car. I didn't even want that car! Once the dealership told us how much it was going to be a month I said let's look at something cheaper, but no, he had to have the most expensive one on the lot. Now, because he has to give me 200 a week as opposed to the 150 I asked for when we had the Thunderbird, he's accusing me of being dishonest about how much the bills are just so I can have some money in my pocket.

Oh my God...I was literally speechless. This is the same "man" who was steady collecting money on his gun he sold to one of my brother's friends when he was out of work and kept the money to himself, while I was buying him cigarettes and food and going hungry just to make sure that he was taken care of.

I'm not one to remind people of all I've done for them, especially since when I do something for someone, I do it out of love, compassion, etc., but I can't believe he's so quick to forget that without me for the past five years, his ass would have been out on the street.

I hate my life, I hate my life..did I mention I hate my life?

My lower back hurts so bad. I think it's these stupid office chairs. That or the raggedy couch I have. I've been sleeping on it for the past couple of days.

Next, my dad put the alternator belt on my car and he told me it was running fine. So when I go to pick it up tonight, it starts smoking really bad and smells like burnt rubber. Then when I got it back to my house, he asked me to start it back up and it wouldn't start until my dad fiddled with the battery cables a little, so it's probably the alternator itself which I really don't have the money to fix right now.

I've been having to leave work early 45 minutes each day so I can get home in time for Brad to go to work. I can't afford to do it, so whether that little piece of shit car likes it or not, she's going to work with me tomorrow. Momma's got to eat.

Oy vey!

I think I want to throw myself off of a bridge after the night I just had. Everybody and their brother decided to call into the PBS pledge drives for their copy of Superstars of the Seventies Live Soul. Jesus H. Christ. Don't you have anything better to do???!! I mean, it is Saturday night. Even if I was home on a Saturday night I could sure as hell find something better to do than watch fucking public access television.

Brad is such a moron. I can't even believe it but apparently while he was out of work, he decided he wanted to sell his gun to a crackhead. If that wasn't bad enough, this said crackhead then gave the gun to his dealer in leu of cash for the drug. So Brad had to call it in to the police as stolen. WTF????!!


You are a PHOENIX in your soul and your
wings make a statement. Huge and born of flame,
they burn with light and power and rebirth.
Ashes fall from your wingtips. You are an
amazingly strong person. You survive, even
flourish in adversity and hardship. A firm
believer in the phrase, 'Whatever doesn't kill
you only makes you stronger,' you rarely fear
failure. You know that any mistake you make
will teach you more about yourself and allow
you to 'rise from the ashes' as a still greater
being. Because of this, you rarely make the
same mistake twice, and are not among the most
forgiving people. You're extremely powerful and
wise, and are capable of fierce pride, passion,
and anger. Perhaps you're this way because you
were forced to survive a rough childhood. Or
maybe you just have a strong grasp on reality
and know that life is tough and the world is
cruel, and it takes strength and independence
to survive it. And independence is your
strongest point - you may care for others, and
even depend on them...but when it comes right
down to it, the only one you need is yourself.
Thus you trust your own intuition, and rely on
a mind almost as brilliant as the fire of your
wings to guide you.You are eternal and because
you have a strong sense of who and what you
are, no one can control your heart or mind, or
even really influence your thinking. A symbol
of rebirth and renewal, you tend to be a very
spiritual person with a serious mind - never
acting immature and harboring a superior
disgust of those who do. Likewise, humanity's
stupidity and tendency to want others to solve
their problems for them frustrates you
endlessly. Though you can be stubborn,
outspoken, and haughty, I admire you greatly.

*~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
brought to you by Quizilla

No Subject

So Brad got a job (a 50 hour a week job plus mandatory 8 hours of overtime on Saturdays; I do not envy him) and my temporary poverty is finally over. Just in time, too, because I'm down to my last eight cigarettes with no hope of getting anymore until Brad cashes his check today.

*sniff*

My mother's best friend's son is home from South Korea and is now moving to Washington to finish his Ranger training. They had a going away party for him Friday night which I missed because I never received the invitation my mother sent me. I'll probably stop by tomorrow evening before they leave and say good-bye.

His wife is pregnant again, this time with a boy.

And, damn it, it's happening again. It's that time of the month and I'm having those dirty fantasies about the LOTR men, this time Eomer - LOL! I seriously need help. Or to get laid, right and proper.

LOTR wins!

They won everything they were nominated for at the Oscars last night! Yay.