New evidence released in Kennedy assassination

An artist's rendition of what these so called sniper kittens look like.

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(CHRISTOFFUS) -- As the country moves forward the Warren commission's inquiry has yet to be declassified.

In a pre-release that was arranged by Sen. Clinton earlier this decade, some evidence in the JFK assassination was declassified today.

The documents released suggest that Oswald had nothing to do with the assassination at all. It also detailed a plan to divert the car carrying president Kennedy to another street.

“With all the rumors and speculation flying around for almost half a century this is an opportunity to find out the truth,” says Palmala Handerson, spokeswoman for the National Archives.

“The findings of the Warren commission have always left a doubt in my mind. Now I get to see whether those doubts are more than just that.”

In an overview of the papers that were released we found that the military had been using specially trained kittens for top secret missions all over the world. Then, to get rid of all evidence they had the kittens targeted by a system known as G.O.D. (Gun Of Death).

This weapon was fired by an operator who moved his/her hand rapidly over a sensitive joy stick building up enough power to fire the S.P.E.R.M. (Specially Programmed Electronic Radio Munitions) and thus wipe the innocent looking kitten from the face of the earth.

It was used in the assassination of Arch Duke Ferdinand and also Mussolini as well as many other assassinations that until today remained unsolved.

Evidence shows that G.O.D. was used in conjunction with the Kennedy assassination, leaving only the rifle behind.

Police picked up Oswald as he left for coffee and as per orders took him into custody for the political atrocity he allegedly committed.

Investigative reporting has not determined who is controlling the S.P.E.R.M. weapons or if the operators are even aware of their purpose. Evidence suggests that unintentional firing of the weapon may be linked to the growing number of kitten deaths worldwide.