I think I am becoming a park whore, haha, well maybe not quite that, just a park addict. I've been going to the park lately, like everyday and usually not just one park nono, today I went to three. As you can see I have nothing better to do during the day than to visit the local hotspots, they're nice no doubt about it, and quite relaxing but do you think three may have been a bit much? I'm not sure. The first park I went to was up on a hill overlooking the city so you can look way out and down or out and up, city or sky, which ever looks nicer, usually the sky. I spent a couple hours at that park as is quite obvious from the slight burn on my legs, in a day or two it'll be a great tan. Then I decided to go to a second park by the river, I was only there a few minutes though. Just long enough to go down to my secluded little area, take off my sandals and wade around in the cool waters. Very nice. Then it was off the third park, also by the river and I sat there in the shade for an hour or so just listening to music and looking out at the water and the people. It's flood season here and the water is rather high, so there was a bench kinda in the middle of the water but not fully submerged, I wanted to go out and sit on it but I would have felt rather dorkish doing that with all the people around. Tomorrow though I might. I think today on my way to the third park I found the perfect excuse as to why I am spending so much time at the parks. It's because when I get a job(I'll be all positive about that) I wont have the days free anymore so I won't be able to go nearly as much, so I am just soaking up an extra amount of sun while I can for when I'm stuck inside all day I can call on my sun reserves. And also we have been rather lacking in such nice weather this year so I'm also just taking advantage of that. There, it's not really that I don't have a life as it may seem, I'm just looking towards the future and doing the things now that I won't do so much later. I like that excuse, I think that enables me to go to all three parks again tomorrow, what do you think?
After saying that, the parks aren't really the best place for me to go. There are couples there and families there and I'm alone there, which I really don't want to be. It kind of depresses me. Seeing all these happy, smiling people, cuddling, holding hands, spending quality time together and I'm just there with my sunglasses on to hide my eyes and my headphones on to block out the noise so I can be in my own little world where I'm not so alone. Yeah, I take Lisa with me in my heart and thoughts but I want so much more than that. I want us to be the happy, smiling couple. I want us to be cuddling and holding hands. I want us to be spending quality time together. I just want to be able to look at her wherever we are and not only be able to do it when I close my eyes or shut myself off from the rest of the world. I just want to be able to reach out and put my hand on her back or around her waist. I want to sit beside her at the riverside and listen to the rushing water and I want to wade with her to the bench surrounded by water and feel dorky together as we just sit there with the water around us. I want to see her in her boxer shorts and nothing else and I want to lay in bed with her naked body against mine. I want to be woken up with a kiss in the middle of the night and feel her hands on me and know that we won't sleep again until we both collapse in exhaustion. I want to go to the theatre with her and spend more time kissing than we do watching. And I want to hear her say my name and feel in her voice that my name is never meant to touch the lips of another. I know we will have all this and everything else we want, I just want it all now and soon and someday are just taking way too long.
But I do have her now, she just signed on. Maybe I will add more later. I love you so much Lisa.
I miss you Jazzie |
