stupidcrooks

- Demonstration -

Gary Blantz was arrested for kidnapping a bar owner near Lancaster, Pennsylvania in 1992. Police reported later that Blantz shot himself in the foot with his .45 caliber revolver in order to show his victim what would happen if he disobeyed.

- Another Real Genius -

When his .38-caliber revolver failed to fire at its intended victim
during a hold-up in Long Beach, California, robber James Elliot did
something that can only inspire wonder: he peered down the barrel and
tried the trigger again. Happily for most concerned, this time it
worked.

- The Counterfeiter -

Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills.

- Ever Seen a Car Before? -

45 year-old Amy Brasher was arrested in San Antonio, Texas, after a mechanic reported to police that 18 packages of marijuana were packed in the engine compartment of the car which she had brought to the mechanic for an oil change. According to police, Brasher later said that she didn't realize that the mechanic would have to raise the hood to change the oil.

- Vending Machine Robber -

Portsmouth, R.I.Police charged Gregory Rosa, 25, with a string of vending machine robberies in January when he: 1. fled from police inexplicably when they spotted him loitering around a vending machine and 2. later tried to post his $400 bail in coins.

- What a Weapon! -

Karen Lee Joachimi, 20, was arrested in Lake City, Florida, for robbery of a Howard Johnson's motel. She was armed with only an electric chainsaw, which was not plugged in.

The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into Burger King in Ypsilanti, Michigan at 7:50 am, flashed a gun and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he said he couldn't open the cash register without a food order. When the man ordered onion rings, the clerk said they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.

- Doh! -

A convict broke out of jail in Washington D.C., then a few days later accompanied his girlfriend to her trial for robbery. At lunch, he went out for a sandwich. She needed to see him, and thus had him paged. Police officers recognized his name and arrested him as he returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen over the lunch hour.

- Ever Seen a Copy Machine Before? -

Police in Radnor, Pennsylvania, interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

- Teenage Car Thieves -

Three teen-aged car thieves bailed out of a stolen 1993 Honda Accord in Alexandria VA in December 1995 when they realized they were being followed by a Washington DC police cruiser. In an effort to escape, the trio ran into swampy woods towards a brick building which happened to be the Alexandria police headquarters and city jail. At the time of the teens' flight, a team of K-9 officers and their dogs were about to begin a search exercise in the same woods. In addition, the escape attempt coincided with the police department's shift change doubling the number of officers at the station. The hapless thieves were captured within minutes. Alexandria Police Chief Charles E. Samarra remarked, "These guys didn't stand a chance. There were so many officers, it was almost hard to figure out who made the arrests. It was almost like it was part of the K-9 drill when they went running by."

- Shoplifter -

Anastasios Balodimas was arrested for shoplifting in St. Petersburg FL in March 1996. Although handcuffed, Balodimas jumped into a idling police cruiser and escaped from the police department parking lot. Balodimas was arrested again later the same day for shoplifting in Largo FL, but no longer had the handcuffs or the police car.

- Unwitting Accomplice -

In April, after her arrest for robbing a Springfield, Mo., Bank of America, Joyce Lingle told police that she had not read the note that she had handed a teller (and for which she received a bag in exchange) and only began to suspect there had been a bank robbery after she walked out the door and saw employees lock it behind her. Lingle is married to a jailed murder suspect, was in the company of a second man during her bank transaction, and implied to police that the two men were just using her.



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