Having a baby
will create a whole new relationship between you and your partner. In many
ways, this is a positive thing that will bring you closer and closer as
you realize you're responsible for a miracle. Unfortunately, life isn't
always easy and sometimes the stresses that accompany a new baby can take
their toll on a relationship.
While things between you and your partner are bound to get rocky when the
baby won't stop crying, you lose mass amounts of sleep,or you both
experience emotional awakenings (be it hormonal or in response to your new
lifestyle), you can still manage to love and care for each other. It may
not be easy, but keeping the
following tips in the back of your mind can
help ease the transition and keep your household peaceful and loving.
* Develop and Use Team Strategies: In any relationship team work is
important, but when a new baby is involved its an absolute must. Creating
team work strategies is as easy as saying "Since I get up to breastfeed
during the night, you will be on for diaper duty," or "Since you are home
with the baby all day, when I get home I will give you "X" amount of
personal time where I will
care for the baby."
* Communication is Key: Communication is the number one way to make sure
you and your partner function as a team. If you feel that your needs or
emotions are being ignored or that you are near your breaking point, it's
important to communicate those feelings to your partner before things get
out of control.
* Educate Your Self: Educating yourself is a great way to calm your
nerves, make better informed decisions, and ultimately handle situations
with greater ease and more confidence. While there is a ton of information
available, I highly suggest referring to your pediatrician and OBGYN for
advice as well as where to find valid information such as specific
websites or books they find are helpful for new parents. It's also
important that you utilize your time at the doctor by making a list of
questions to ask during your visit. When it comes to your baby and family,
there are no stupid questions.
* Ask Other Parents: Sometimes the best place to find advice, especially
concerning your relationship
with your partner, is to ask others who have
been there before. Other couples who have children can offer you a list of
things that did or did not work for them and why. You can ask friends and
family who have children or if you prefer to do this "on your own," you
can turn to blogs and forums where parents share experiences, ideas, and
stories that may help you.
* Be Flexible: Even though you are the acting, responsible adult, the
first few month after your baby is born it may seem like they are
ultimately in charge. This alone can make it impossible to rely on any set
plan of events. It's extremely important that you and your partner realize
that not everything will go as planned and that sometimes situations arise
that will ruin your night off, make you miss dinner, or leave you feeling
emotionally and physically drained.
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