"First lets kill all the psychologist,
then we can kill the lawyers... " Jpony~
LOL
You with me on this billg?

Redmond Rose~

Epilogue
lyric

This is yet another RANT! LOL

I may as well publish it. After the women at Microsoft got their hands on it and my e-mail to Bill Gates, it was all over the place.  They were really obsessed with the fact that killed animals and butchered them for food, something a lot of rural people do. You would think I was a part of some satanic cult or something. It's just insane. How many animals are killed in the US so that people can eat meat?  Someone has to do it. I've never taken pleasure in it. But there are certainly some women in my community and at Microsoft who have taken pleasure in using my physical condition to intentionally harm me. This is psychotic behavior and I have a real problem with psychotics having access or control over people who are physically or mentally frail. So I'm going to post it all.

This can be quite humorous to read, even though it is the recount of my emotional breakdown after being drug, raped, then hazed, injured and assaulted yet again, resulting in a serious cervical injury that required surgery.  The humor is that it exist and is now on the Internet and Microsoft can't do a dammed thing about it or any other the other document entered into a court case, because they chose not to mediate this. I'm smarter than Microsoft lawyer including his old man. 

I'm going to eventually organized this into a e-book on CD-ROM. People who really want to know the REAL Microsoft for future cases, can learn from my mistakes and those of Microsoft's.  I never went back to work after this.  If I had, they would have had a non-disclosure agreement over this whole mess and the value of my talent. By blackballing me and making me an outcast on SSI they also gave me 100% of my time to become a stringer in other cases. 

I'm so good at the job they fired me from--lead tracker--that I even had Fax number into the main White House. And they are so concerned bout my skills that they went to court 3 times over the past 13 year to get anti-harassment order. What they wanted me to do to you and the government, was NOT OK when it was them. LOL  They are insane!

This is yet another psychological battery done on me by the government at a major cost to taxpayers. Why?  Well, because they can't understand how someone with a hearing problem that causes auditory dyslexia can be so smart. My language handicap, not disability, is no worse than someone born in a foreign country, trying to work in the US. We bring these people in and accommodate their handicap, giving them jobs, but won't accommodate people like me. Instead, I'm on SSI!

It's been my experience that most men in psychology in fact are there due to their own psychological problems. This psychologist lacked appropriate personal boundaries and was salacious in his behavior. His interest in the sexual assault at Microsoft by a racial minority was totally voyeuristic, effecting both this assessment and my ability to interact with him.

The last thing I remember is walking into the parking lot behind his office. He said he had something to show me. He opened the trunk of his car and took out what look to be a hippie type instrument to show me. It had some kind of bead/feather ornamentation as I recall. It was bizarre at best. It was as if he was trying to impress me. Was I missing something here or was he missing his professional place? I never for got it or how pissed off I was about the whole test ordeal. Yeah, I'm the one with the personality disorder....NOT! LOL  Get the picture?  I wonder how much money he made in the past 13 years since trashing my career and reputation. I'll just call him "Rodger Rabid the Lasciviosus."

Rodger Meinz assessment was based on a need he had to justify what happened to me at Microsoft.  He is the person that said I "must" tell someone in management about this uneducated Filipino guy 12 years younger than me. He drugged and assaulted me during an off campus meeting prior to a trip. Then he and another man hazed me by running me around the DC subway after 10:00 PM in an intentional attempt to harm and terrify me. I was injured during this process. threatened, and yet another rape attempt occurred and further injuries. Then he seemed to be encouraged to harass me on the job.

I didn't want to tell anyone what I had stupidly gotten into. When I did, I was fired without any kind of internal investigation by Microsoft HR or by my own manager who was female. The men got together and made the decision. At Microsoft a penis is more important that your IQ.

I don't believe that the antitrust penalties against Microsoft are sufficient to curve criminal activities that continue to go on.  They want control and if anyone goes up against them watch out. They are not only men willing to rape, kill, defame and destroy our families, they even supported child pornography and promoted violence against women over the Internet. 

I still run into women from Microsoft from time to time. To this day they have never talk to me about the violence and harassing I'm continuing to experience.  They also continue to deny me developer support. They took me to court in 1994 simply for contacting women about the child pornography on the internet. Standing up against this was enough to justify Microsoft ending my career and attempt to do my own software company. 

As far as I'm concerned this man's report is more than just nerd bashing. It's an attempt to label gifted people as having mental disorders for other purpose. Given that you have to be so logical and focused to do programming, which I do even in HTML all the time, it's a conflict of terms. That is what is really insane.  I'm not nuts or DD and neither is Bill Gates.

I also don't cooperate much on test when I'm angry and being ogled by yet another sexually obsessed shrink. I just had a bunch of these test  two years earlier. No average person has to go through this level of securitization to get a job. This is blatant discrimination. I did extremely well in multiple technologies so I must have something else wrong with me? This is a total waste of tax money.

So boys... these scores aren't as high as I've achieved in my life.  So hit me again and see what I do next.  I know why Willingham and Stone quit!  You know I think some federal judges are getting more interested in this issue.

Click here for a magazine in Europe
And remember, all my graphics and web pages are free to be copied!

alpha delta charlie echo... LOL

I was once asked if I would testify against Microsoft in international court.
My answer is still yes if I'm still alive given the massive assault on me. But this web is being mirrored so hopefully someone can use it if I end up DEAD! Keep Mirroring it boys! LOL

Happy New Year Folks!

The Annotated Redmond Rose~
You never really understand Alice until you are in Wonderland yourself.

        En vrais amis, les rouge~ rose rouge :-)

Du l'occurrence au niveau cérébral,
tu contrôle ce rêve , tu exerces sur ces forces en mouvement ces lieu privilégié des échanges!

Vive ce roi vaillant ? Ha!
Ce diable le triple talent
d'être un vers galant! BD.

Qu'est-ce qui bouge en toi qui menace de déferler et d'ébranler tes sécurités??? :-(

Programme de battre ce ver guerre, d'vaguer au diable. <@> Q :-)

Qu'est-ce qui bouge en toi?
Vous êtes aliéné... êtes étranger

LOL

hopefully I can at least kill this turkey's career...

---

Rodger Meinz, Ph.D.
Clinical Psychologist

---

406 Main Street, Suite #110
Edmonds, WA 98020
(206) 775-7937
(Area code changed to 425 at present)

November 26, 1990 
(This assessment was done in August of 1990.)

 

Ms. Laura Vujovich, VRC

(This lady is a real moron. I'm assuming she is the one who labeled me developmentally disabled. By trashing me she seems to have found her place at the UW with all the other bastards. Is this yet another one of Melinda's friends or your dad's. White List this boys and add Meinz to that one. Add Kurt Johnson--he trashed me just prior to the UW getting $10 million for the Mary Gates Endowment. All UW slime.  I wonder what other criminal charges we can come up with for the FED in D.C. I also have a few at LA+ controlling my money that are chummy with your wife. AND my daughter told me what happened at the UW to her. Is this not retaliation? What did I do accept try to get back my job that I was wrongfully fired from and compensation for the physical injuries.

Is this now the real looking glass case? Since I have not legal right to the courts in this state, were going to do a real time game. Baby I have boxes of legal papers involving you or your family and their interference in my life. Just because you have money you think you can destroy someone who doesn't when you don't even know who the hell I am. AND the worse part is that you are too much of a coward to really meet with me and find out who I really am. Instead, you play the Walther Middy part... How very safe?

I have an elbow that never was treated that is painful and continues to dislocate, a head injury that was never treated, and am now consider an  incomplete quadriplegic due to this bull shit. And remember my government friends are mostly in Europe. For God sakes many, one of my graphics was on the cover of Linux World in  1997. You are still hacking the shit out of me.)

DVR-DSHS
Bellevue, Washington

 

CONFIDENTIAL Re: Joan Brewer

 

Dear Ms. Vujovich.

 

As you requested. I conducted a psychological evaluation of Ms. Brewer's psychological functioning as it pertained to her current vocational predicament and petition for DVR services. My first contact with Ms. Brewer took place on August 4, 1990. During that interview, however, Ms. Brewer presented with so many issues that it was clear additional interviews would need to be conducted before a more complete analysis of her vocational predicament could be obtained. In part, this was dictated by her response style: she tended to go into matters in great length but in a fairly circumlocutory fashion. Moreover, a number of events occur while I was attempting to evaluate her, including the loss of her job with Microsoft which involved sexual harassment charges. During this evaluation, a psychiatrist, a psychologist and a lawyer also working with Ms. Brewer were interviewed with her willing and signed consent.

 

Sources of Evaluation Information

Review of Records
Mental Status Evaluation
Clinical Interview
WAIS-R
Woodcock-Johnson Educational Achievement Battery
Structured Personality Inventory
MMP I
Trails B Test of Mental Tracking

(Now why were they doing all these test on a dumb fuck bartender and waitress, again and again and again?  See they couldn't understand how a women walked in off a Ranch in Sprague River at 4,500 and excel in all this technology. Well, that is because like a lot of use in the counter culture, I was doing empirical research... on things like molecular biology and the effects electro-magnetic on organisms--especially reproduction and genetic mutation. I wrote to Bill Gates about my research... and this is what I got back. My ex-husband is still claiming I was abducted by Aliens. "Jitterbug Perfume." I've always been this way.  My husbands were stupid so I didn't talk to them about thing other than their new paper back novel and digging out the tractor yet again. 

This was the fourth sets. I was retested again in 1993-94 at the UW. They were concerned that I knew so much and might stress people out at work.  No mental disorder, but stay away from Bill Gates! That is strange.  I literally feel like two people. Why is a women attempting to get venture capitol or a research job not allowed to do the same kind of interaction with Gates as a male. It always frustrated me that he would meet with the males but not with a women. 

Truth or Dare? giggle giggle.

I'm a curious person with lots of time on my hands...  I don't understand why you are the biggest one I've ever had in my whole life. You're just a research project... and so is Microsoft...  Don't worry about it. I've been taking things apart and putting them back together again since I was a little baby... and unlike you my stuff worked. If you want your stuff to work you will have to ask me to put it back. My real plan is to allow your boys and your queen and ladies in waiting to kill me off for just speaking out in the women's favor.  Make me a martyr. And then the women will have a new religion and role model that isn't stupid.

Since this set of test, I was also put through more test in 2000 and 2002. Now they are surprised that I'm not dead. I wonder how Bill Neukom and Paul Maritz are doing these days... LOL I've been concentrating on Steve-o and brianv also...)

 

 Joan Brewer-

 

page 2

 

Relevant Background History  (Much of the following is inaccurate history. I can only assume that he is a bad note taker as are most physiologist who have a tendency to project while interviewing.)
Ms. Brewer grew up in a very religious family of five children where by her report. women were highly respected. Her father was an aerospace
mechanic and her mother a retail sales clerk. She described herself as a child who was bright and brilliant but "really at odds" with her father because she "didn't measure up." Nonetheless, she related that she was raised in a very idyllic, sheltered home life that didn't prepare her for the outside world.

 

During high school,. however, she did work for a couple of years as a part- time waitress. After graduating in 1969 (end 1968 I went to Armstrong Nursery and worked in their computer center--in a seasonal job.) she went to work at Hang Ten Incorporated. After nine months or employment at Hang Ten, she was given her own department to manage and ran into difficulties, she noted, because she was "expected to manage men who were paid more" than she, and "they wouldn't respond." She was terminated after two years of employment at Hang Ten. (this is a blatant like. I quit Hang Ten to move to Seattle where my sister live because I thought I could get a job at Eddy Bauer. I was never fired from a job in my life until I started working with DVR in Bellevue after college! NEVER!)

 

She then moved to the Seattle area where her sister lived. She went to work as a dinner and cocktail waitress. and at times as a bartender. She left this work when she married in 1974 (should be 1973.)

 

Ms. Brewer had her first child in 1974 and returned to work a year later in a restaurant (I  breast feed my son 2 years so this is interesting...) Her husband and she were divorced in 1976, but she remarried in 1977 and had two more children. Her husband and she lived in Klamath Falls, Oregon (This is wrong too. He was so busy ogling me he really messed this up. I lived in Sprague River and moved to Klamath Falls after we separated.  I was doing research in the counter culture on many thing. Dissected many many animals and studied alternative medicine, quantum theory, optics, math... that broke up the marriage. ) where she managed their ranch for four years as well as a rural coop (wrong again... I managed a coop in Klamath Falls, prior to buying a ranch in Sprague River. I hate these shrinks who can't stop their ogling.) Her life at that time was laid back and slow (yeah like up in the morning at 5:00, milk the cow, feed the animals, process the milk and get the kids... typical ranch life.)  and it was during this time that she developed skills in stain glass art. Her husband and she, however, began having significant marital difficulties, so she decided to try to make her stain glass art into a business in anticipation that she might soon have to make a living for herself again. However, she wasn't able to do so. ( In a town of 2,000 there was no market. due to a lack of money for materials once single.)

 

Following her second divorce she went back to work in 1983 as a part-time bartender, (wrong--waitress in a Mexican Dinner House who worked one day--Sunday Brunch--in the bar from about 10:00 to 5:00 PM  for about 4 months. ) It was while  this position that she fell face forward on a greasy floor, hitting  a metal stand. and injuring her neck and back. She also vomited throughout the night and believed she might  have sustained a concussion as well. Nonetheless, she related that her sustained
back and neck injuries were later diagnosed as a degenerative disc disease. (This was the disability I went back to college for with the help of DVR in Klamath Falls Oregon.)

Joan: Brewer-

 

page 3

 

and she was unable to return to work she had historically held as a waitress (so what happened to being a rancher, working in a computer center in 1969 for close to an year, managing a coop for almost 3 years) and bartender.  (This isn't true either! I bused tabled 9 hour a week from age 15 until I was 17 when I went to work in the kitchen as a pantry cook also part-time. I graduated high school at the end of 1998 and started college. I worked from 1969 to 1972 full time in office jobs--first in a computer center working with computer technology and then at Hang Ten. It was all math and memory based. I only worked part time in the last half of 1997 and 1773 as a waitress--mostly as a dinner waitress at the Olympic Hotel, The Pantry in the U District and in Pioneer Square-Underground Restaurant--making 25-35 in tips a night Dinner Witnessing part-time!  I was wondering why they always thought I was a bartender.)

 

She was then referred to Oregon VRD in 1988. where she was assisted in returning to school to learn skills that would permit her to accommodate her new physical limitations to work as she new it. She attended the Oregon Institute of Technology. from which she earned a B.S. degree in 1988 in computer systems engineering, while reportedly earning a 3.7 GPA.  (College transcripts are on the Internet. Taught the last two years, developed the curricula for Software System Engineering Lab and did research work at OIT in Unix and lexical interpreters.  I mean I had to pay for college somehow. I was so good at this that my professors were trying to get me to go to graduate school so I could teach.  I even applied for a scholarship and came in second. Then right before I moved to Washington I was called and offered a scholarship and declined at that point. It's amazing how this was also left out of this report like anything else I ever did that ws intelligent. There was no mention that Microsoft had head hunted me and had tried to hire me in 1988. That is on the Internet too. At the end, he gets into the real problem, that I'm very attractive and this could be problematic for men--including himself. I had just been assaulted and injured very badly and now I'm being assessed by a guy I didn't know, all alone in is office on a Saturday, and he is making comments about my appearance and was too personal with me given that this was a DVR assessment. I remember when I left he wanted to show me something in the trunk of his car that he had--I'm thinking it had a feather on it.  Kind of a hippy thing. Perhaps a flute. Can't remember for sure. It was a time I have tried to forget.)

 

While in school. however. she continued to have problems with what she felt was dyslexia and she underwent a psychological evaluation in June, 1988, conducted by Dr. Charies Main. Ph.D.. During that evaluation. Dr. Main found Ms. Brewer to present with both a reading and an arithmetic learning disability while at the same time producing a Verbal IQ of 118, a Performance IQ of 140. and a Full Scale IQ of 130. 

 

Nonetheless, and following college,  she obtained her first position with Minisoft in November of 1988 as a software engineer. Oregon DVR was paying for 50% of her wages at Minisoft. At first she was working as a programmer, which "was fine." However,  when her supervisors began talking to her about performing more documentation work she related, "That was another thing altogether." She then decided to tell them of her dyslexia so she wouldn't be set up for failure but was let go when she did so. (This isn't true at all. They hired me knowing I was dyslexic. So was the their main programmer. Most of us are. We all hate to do technical writing. It's considered grunt work.  I was let go because their sales were down and they couldn't afford to keep me after the OJT ran out or so they said. I was picked up by a head hunter for Microsoft in just a few months and still feel I was only hired by Minisoft to get me up here after rejecting the job in 1988. They eventually went out of business.)

 

She then obtained a job with Microsoft in May 1989. where her job was to proof read programs that were being converted into German. ensuring -there were no semantic errors. The job was a non-technical entry level position (I was hired as systems tester and a batch program to create the gold masters for Microsoft windows, do the file comparisons for verification, and clean up. I was working next to Mike Harris who was dating Gates executive assistant. He was a male bimbo. It wasn't that I was over qualified. The others were NOT qualified and weren't able to do valid testing which is a problem for Microsoft still. This is why they have so many bugs and security holes.) and she was that she was overqualified for the position. She had used the services of a professional "head hunter" to obtain the job, and she had reasoned that if she took such an entry level job that at least she was working for Microsoft and could use this entry level job to position herself for a move into an area at Microsoft that was more commensurate with her abilities and skills.

However, Ms. Brewer reported that she ran into difficulties with her co- workers at Microsoft. Due to her dyslexia,  she related that she takes things very literally because she is "so inference based." which makes it difficult

 

Joan Brewer-

 

page 4

 

for her to "pick up on jokes." She went on to note that she was the only employee in her department with an engineering degree and she believed many of her co-workers were intimidated because possessing programming skills at Microsoft carried with it "high status." Nonetheless, she discovered that her male co-workers began playing jokes and pranks on her. While she was attempting to perform her testing work, they would reportedly put "bugging programs" on her machine which would interfere with her work. The bugging programs were routinely used to "stress systems" at :Microsoft, thereby aiding in determining their resiliency.

 

Ms. Brewer found the pranks  particularly annoying, and reportedly took her complaints to the Human Resources Department where she related her complaints were reportedly dismissed with a "boys will be boys" attitude. She went on to let HR staff know that she had dyslexia, but reportedly no action was taken by HR staff.

 

"Things then got out of control" She related. One co-worker in particular, an ex-pro tennis player went out of his way to annoy her. Then when her male co-workers found out she was dyslexic, one of her co-workers pretended' he was dyslexic in seeming mockery of her difficulties, and everyone seemed to catch on but her. Her co-workers found such antics funny, she related. but she had difficulty doing so.

 

Then, at the completion or a project. her department went on a celebration picnic. Her female supervisor wasn't at the party, so Ms. Brewer was the only female there. By her report. "The guys started doing their jokes, and it got, out of hand." She found many of the jokes to be "viciously vulgar." ,Si1e'remembered one particular dirty joke that everyone seemed to get but her. and when her co-workers alternated to explain it to her, she felt very embarrassed. They reportedly responded by "ripping" her because of her dyslexia. and she quickly left, went to a bathroom. and cried. She got a ride back to Microsoft. and was "called in"
(****** end last edit) and told she was fired because she "made the males feel uncomfortable" She appealed her case to Human Services staff but her complaint was discounted, she related. and she was told that she was being terminated because she wasn't doing her job.

 

She had held the above job at Microsoft for two months when she was fired. She was somewhat surprised, related, that she was fired

 

Joan Brewer-

 

page 5

 

because she had come to learn that Microsoft was well known for not releasing anyone. If there was a problem employees were more routinely just assigned a new position in some other department. She had thought that even though the position at which she was working: was "very low level" and even though her working conditions with her co-workers were trying, she would soon be able to move within Microsoft to "something better"  but her firing prevented her from doing so.

 

She then found a testing position at Aldus as pan of a limited three month. contract. Again. she claimed that everyone she worked with was undereducated.

 

Following her brief stay at Aldus. she obtained a job at Laser Access. As a new employee, she was under a three month probationary period, but her problems began, she related. when she was assigned a new supervisor who didn't like her. She was given a written examination. and was found to have low math and problem solving skills. but good language skills. She was very upset, she related. because now they wanted her to write documentation rather than do programming, which took her away from her real' strengths, (programming) while having her move into work in areas sensitive to compromising effects her dyslexia. The test, she related, was written. which made it very difficult for her to show her mathematical and programming reasoning.

 

She then applied for a "low level job" at Applied Microsystems. As a pan of the application process. she took an oral examination which required her to solve' problems where she had to emulate CPU's used in testing ,compilers and assemblers. Ms. Brewer related that her supervisors were surprised that she performed as well did. They wanted to hire her, she related. as a product marketing engineer. but a phone call from a head hunter who knew of her. proved problematic. The head hunter (This is wrong. It was IAMCAR who had an article written in the Seattle Times about me having auditory dyslexia-which is do to tone deafness. I can't do phonic because I can't hear many sounds-th, f, a, u, o. etc. I've never had a REAL learning disability. Never failed a class or had special education accept for being gifted.) reportedly told them of her dyslexia. and concerned about the errors she might make. her contract was cancelled.

 

She then attempted w return to work at Microsoft and was able to obtain a telemarketing (Wrong Again. You don't send telemarketer on Business trips to Washington D.C. So what was I hired as?)  position through a Temporary Services (Wrong again. I was head hunted and then hired by Kelly. In fact, I had no contract with Microsoft when I was injured because I wasn't working for Kelly yet.)  She related that her previous employment problems (I wasn't a party girl. This stuff didn't come from me) at Microsoft did not provide an obstacle to this new employment opportunity because departmental hiring

 

Joan Brewer

 

page 6

 

at Microsoft was not centralized. Nonetheless, she soon found herself again embroiled in work adjustment difficulties, Ms. Brewer related that she was hired to market Microsoft's new "windows" software to U.S. Department of Defense computer users. In her capacity she was asked to contact U.S. facilities by phone and attempt to sell the product's utility. She related that she was also asked to go to Washington, D.C., to introduce the product to potential buyers with the DD, and was told by an employee she thought to be her supervisor that before they went on the trip perhaps they should sit down and talk, off campus. She agreed to meet her male superior (uneducated Filipino male 12 year younger whose work experience included data entry and telemarketing.) for a drink after work, and she agreed as weil to meet him at his apartment. She met him at .his apartment, had some drinks. and '.vent out to a tavern where she believed she might have had three beers. She remembered feeling somewhat wierd (he misspelled this not me) about their meeting at the tavern because he didn't talk to her about their (remember I'm suppose to be telemarketing?) upcoming business trip. Nonetheless, they then returned to his apartment, where she believed she "blacked out." The next thing she remembered was waking up naked. She got dressed and left without waking him.

 

In the days that followed at work, she related. that he would not only not talk to her about her work requirements, but she forgot her bra as she left his apartment, and he kept letting her know that he had it. Moreover, he reportedly sent her pornographic graphics (beware, this zip file contains pornography from 1988 at Microsoft) on her computer, and continued to make sexual overtures. She reiated that she attempted to simply avoid his behaviors wanting, instead to focus more directly on her work.

(Imagine what it's like for a women like me to be working with someone who can't even write a sentence but thinks that because cane install windows off the local server that he should be hired as an engineer in Systems. Be afraid... be very afraid... they are still there man.  You are a victim of your own fast track certificate program who now call them Certified System Engineers. The women did it.)

 

When they went to Washington. D. C.. he came to her hotel room and made advances, (how about attempt rape and physical assault- I didn't get my neck broken talking!) but she reportedly made it very clear to him that she did not want that (any kind) kind of relationship when they returned to Seattle. She continued to have difficulty with :-limo and she complained that he refused to relate to her important aspects of their job. She later learned that he was not her supervisor at all, but that he was at least a "de facto" team leader. She believed that he refused to educate her with regard to relevant work details because she refused his sexual advances. Nonetheless, she was later accused of not being a team player, and she was released from employment.  (see I said this guy was ogling me.  He got this whole test.)

 

Joan Brewer -

 

page 7

(The following is mostly made up and appears to be based on gossip.)
 

Ms. Brewer related that this set of events left her humiliated, shocked, and embarrassed. She called both this psychologist (what psychologist? Name please?) and Kelly Services and complained of the sexual harassment. (Kelly sold me out at once!) She related that Kelly contacted Microsoft and had begun an investigation, and she had retained a lawyer (What lawyer? Name please! Is he refusing to my worker's comp attorney in Oregon who dropped me after the injury at Microsoft? I didn't have an attorney for any of this and Kelly didn't do anything for me) to represent her interests in this matter as well. She has since been referred to a psychiatrist recommended by her lawyers (what the hell is this about?). and has sought additional psychotherapy as well. Her case has been referred to EEOC for investigation and the investigation continues at this time. (every attorney I talked to said they couldn't take a case like this because of the EEOC. They said I shouldn't have allowed the EEOC to investigate because they were white washing cases.)

 

Ms. Brewer related in addition, that she aggravated an old physical injury while on the Washington, D.C. trip referred to above, by her report, she was forced to carry her luggage out to the airport shuttle bus and through the Washington, D.C. subway system while walking at a fast clip to keep up with others. She related that she has since been diagnosed as having a herniated disc in her neck. The injury reportedly causes her left hand to go numb, and she has difficulty sitting in one position for any length of time. She related she has been told she may need surgery, but at the very minimum will need a special supportive chair if she is to return to more sedentary work. In addition to the sexual harassment case above, she has also filed an L&I complaint, and has retained a lawyer in this matter as well. (Didn't have an attorney for that either. In fact it was my inability to find an attorney for any of this that cause my career to go into the toilet. )

 

Self-analysis of employment difficulties
Ms. Brewer's thinking is that all of her difficulties at work can be traced to her dyslexia. (Yep, prior to being labeled this way I never had any employment difficulties. Sexism and discrimination is normal to women. It's just the way it is. Physical and sexual assault is another thing. That is a criminal issue and Microsoft had e-mail evidence to this effect--Glenn told me this. They refused to release it even though they fired him only six months after me. ) In her words, "Due to the (perception of) dyslexia. I can't work at a high level because I have a learning disability (spelling problem and need editing like you do!)  and they expect me to be able to generate finished product correspondence (documentation but this was no problem in my job doing inside sales and engineering support. And I should point out that I'm so good at lead tracing in corporations you called it harassment when I did it in your company.) " She can't work at low level positions because in those capacities she would be working around "bimbo males who have their heads between their legs." (Just like this psychologist.) Working in those capacities, she believed, just sets herself up for harassment. (well when you have an IQ in the 98-99 percentile, you are smarter than 89-99% of the population. The only male how have ever harassed me were men who were intimidated.)

 

She also related that her thinking is too inductive (Wrong, deductive) for "left brain people" and "right brain people see (her) left brain as being suspicious." She related that due to her dyslexia. She always had difficulty thinking in the linear fashion indicative of most right hemisphere people." She had difficulty thinking as most people do, she  related, until she was 32 Years. From the time she was 27 to 32, she became very involved in educating herself about how the brain worked. (works--he has the language disability onto me.) She consumed 25 books every two

 

Joan: Brewer.

 

page 8

 

weeks. she related. intuitively grasping cognitive concepts that eventually
permitted her to think in her own idiosyncratic, linear fashion.

 

Following this self-discovery, she became enthralled with her new found capacities and became much more verbal than she had ever been before. She was also eager to educate herself more formally, which she eventually did. with Oregon VRD's support. However. she continues to have difficulty with what she referred to as "perceptual disabilities" and when under too much stress, her thinking becomes too inductive (deductive is True/False logic) for some people, especially those who think more linearly.

 

Ms. Brewer has reasoned that she needs to work at a place where she can be creative. She believed that she wouldn't fit in at Boeing but thought she would at Microsoft where there is a perceived premium placed on creative inductive thinking. (What the hell is this about. I never wanted to work at Microsoft! I was head hunted and out of work and only took the job because I was trying to get into freelance graphics. Later he talks about me showing him my graphic work.)

 

Ms. Brewer believes that she currently need assistance in writing  letters as she applies for new working, well as professional support to assist her in working  through her reactions to the kinds of difficulties she has experienced.

 

Evaluation Behavior
As related above. Ms. Brewer was clinically interviewed three times in person and five times in various phone conversations. During these contacts, her clinical presentation was very consistent. When she was upset (yeah, you bet baby. He is the idiot who encouraged me to report the co-worker who sexually assaulted me to my manger  and they fired me.) her thoughts were fairly fragmented and extremely tangential. Her affectivity during those moments was tearful. but not unduly so. She was - always able to reality test. She was usually quite anxious, irritated, somewhat tearful. and quite loquacious when upset.  (This guy was harassing me also because he didn't want to accept any responsibility for me loosing my job. Glenn was eventually fired from Microsoft after they went through his e-mail. Meinz kept calling me about this, obviously worried about his part. I was majorly pissed off.)

 

During each contact, Ms. Brewer was heard to have a very fast cognitive speed and her speech was often as pressured. As noted, she was also quite tangential. She reasoned however, that she was just not being as linear in her thinking. Moreover and importantly, when she was observed to have difficulties on the intellectual testing, her mind would go blank, during which times her anxiety seemed to be transformed into a very high energy level, accompanied by silly behavior, restless body language, and an expansive cognitive style. (I wanted out of this guys office in the worse way. I was force to go through an assessment right after being assaulted and injured very badly. I was in major pain and he seem to have a focus on sex with very little if any personal boundaries. I was having to meet him on a weekend in Edmonds and it was very scary for me.)

Joan Brewer

 

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.Ms. Brewer's characterological structure seemed to represent a mixture of histrionic and narcissistic features. (yeah, I was afraid of this man.) Her cognitive style was very expansive and broad brushed. Her gestures and body language were very active and her facial expressions were dramatic as she expressed herself. She repeatedly vacillated between narcissistic self-valuation (when talking about her potentials and strengths) and humiliation and shame when talking about her work difficulties.

 

Whenever upset, she could always be drawn out of her reactions by an appeal to logic and her intellect. particularly if accompanied by comments of supportive encouragement.  Many of her affective reactions were fairly superficial, as well, waxing and waning with the topic being discussed. If the topic was changed, her emotions would follow in quick order. Even when very upset and down cast. her affectively would take a decidedly upbeat and expansive .turn if her abilities were acknowledged and if she were encouraged to think logically.

 

Her MMPI profile was very consistent with that generated in June, 1988, during Dr. Main's .evaluation. see above. Essentially, only the K scale was elevated, and then only slightly so. Despite her many difficulties in psycho-social adjustment, there were no elevations on the clinical scales. Against the backdrop of her many difficulties, her profile reflects a tendency to defend against unwanted thoughts and feelings to excess. She has a  tendency to present herself in a fairly positive light, externalizing difficulties when they do occur.

 

Interestingly, Ms. Brewer described herself as a "basically shy, sensitive, and emotional" person. She was also quite surprised, she related, that men come on to her at work because now that she is beyond her "child bearing years" she doesn't see herself as that attractive. However, many people would likely consider her an attractive woman.  (In the past 20 years I've hand very little, almost no, sexual involvement.  This is because I really don't believe in having sex without love. I've been raped a few times. But only one short relationship and I couldn't do it. Without love there is nothing but emptiness. If I can't be with the one I love than I don't want to have anyone else. This is the way I was raised. I feel that it's does psychological harm to someone who betrays their need for love in exchange for crude sexual pleasure.) Moreover, the more anxious, expansive, and demonstrative she becomes, the more she seems to "forget herself" socially. Repeatedly, she would draw her legs up, or put her arms behind her head, which in many circles could be considered suggestive behavior. (This guy is projecting his sexual baggage onto me.) This issues was discussed with her male lawyer, who also made this observation (once again we have a male lawyer I didn't have for this case. The only attorney I ever had was worker's comp in Salem Oregon that I didn't have contact with accept on one occassion for a very short period during a hearing. It was all by phone. So he must have made this up. I also didn't have a Psychiatrist or Psychologist.  I didn't have any thing going on in Washington accept DVR and he was it.) However, this behavior almost appeared more pre-adolescent than sexual in nature, but given that it occurs in a mature,

 

Joan. Brewer

 

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attractive female, it could be more problematic at work. Moreover, there is some concern that she may he more unwittingly s61icitous of attention in new situations where she has to prove herself than she may be aware, which again' may contribute to difficulties with some male co-workers. Such behavior. of course. does not excuse sexual harassment, but it may yet make her adjustment at work somewhat problematic.

 

Ms. Brewer acknowledged. "People don't like me in a group." Her high energy, expansive and tangential thinking, and dramatic gestures may well dominate the focus of group work to the point where it irritates others. Dr. Main also noted that she may tend to burn some people out, particularly those with whom she closely works. Dr. Main also observed that she might not be aware of the effect her behavior can have on others, and may have a tendency to "view people either for or against her."

 

Intellectual Functioning
The WAIS-R was administered, and the following results are considered a reliable and valid estimate of intellectual function. (Being given this test the same week I was physically and sexually assaulted seem hardly reliable.)

Verbal IQ = 122; Performance IQ = 146; Full Scale IQ = 135.
 

Verbal Subtests	Scale Score	Performance Subtests	Scale Score
Information	13	Picture Completion	14
Digit Span	13	Picture Arrangement	17
Vocabulary	14	Block Design	15
Arithmetic	11	Object Assembly	18
Comprehension	16	Digit Symbol	13
Similarities	12

 

With an earned Full Scale IQ of 135. Her general level of intellectual functioning was round to be operating within the Very Superior range at the 99th percentile. The above results were quite consistent with those obtained by Dr. Main two years ago particularly once practice effects were considered.

 

Particularly telling, however were the difficulties she had on the Arithmetic subtest. Where on Dr. Main's IQ testing, she was able to solve

 

Joan Brewer-

 

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the items on the Arithmetic subtest fairly quickly, she had a good deal of difficulty with those same items today. She had difficulty keeping herself from being overwhelmed by anxiety, and her thinking became progressively fragmented. (not my normal state) Moreover. as she began to have difficulty, she became quite embarrassed about her performance. and she complained of ambient noise. She eventually became somewhat tearful and could not continue. However. within even a few minutes, and after her abilities were acknowledged, she was able to bounce right back and be cheerful. energetic, fairly focused. and proudly self-confident.

 

When Ms. Brewer had difficulties reasoning her way through problems presented to her, her resultant anxieties would often times be transformed into more histrionic form. and her thinking would respond by becoming looser and more fragmented. Interestingly, she seemed to defend against this unwanted emotional state of affairs (viz., the anxiety of poor performance) by thinking that her loose associations were just her attempt to answer fairly staid questions with more creativity, with a more "inductive, right brain" language system. If her answers didn't conform to expectations, then that was the fault of the "left brain" society, which only accepted thought productions within a narrow' band of linear thought. This histrionic and narcissistic defensive structure appeared over and over again in open ended questions. However. when she was asked to solve math problems where there was only one correct answer, she couldn't transform her anxieties into a more comfortable feeling, and she would then feel trapped.

 

However. there were other moments during interviewing when Ms. Brewer's natural intelligence revealed itself quite clearly. She was asked if she knew anything about the computerized graphics of non-linear, fractal geometry, and she readily acknowledged that she did. She was then spontaneously able to walk this psychologist through a most complex analysis of the that computer process while explaining the underlying mathematics in  a very coherent fashion. Moreover, she accomplished this feat without any preparation. When she is "on" and in her element, her thinking, while yet somewhat expansive and high energy (we call this high bandwidth in the computer industry and it's a "good thing"), is very well formulated and articulated. Moreover, she was asked to bring some samples of her computer graphics on the second session, and she complied. The work was quite varied in its aesthetic range, and appeared very professional.

  

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professionally produced.

 

Specific Learning Abilities
Selected sections of the Woodcock-Johnson Psycho-Educational Battery were administered, with the following standard score and grade level equivalent results:

 

Passage (reading) Comprehension	103	12.9	grade level
Letter-Word Identification	100	12.9	grade level
Word Attack	98	12.9	grade level
Dictation (spelling)	98	9.3	grade level
Arithmetic Calculation	110	12.9	grade level

 

(I do not remember having this test or seeing him 3 times. My reading comprehension has always been way above normal. And with my very high math background, I can look at these number and wonder how anyone could come up with suck a straight score. It seems impossible. When I write misspell maybe 1 word in every 200 and most are due to typos. As for reading, these are my book. Not only have I read and comprehended them, I've also taught classes from some of them. This many concentration was way off due to his voyeuristic interest in the sexual assault at Microsoft he was making errors.  This isn't the first time this has happened. Evidently, males think that their penis has way more power over a women than we do. And when you come from a good family and have good self-esteem, you bounce back very fast and just go on. I have a hearing problem. I can't even hear my own last name or say it correctly. Words like truth and tooth sound the same. Deaf and death? Not only do these two sound the same, they ironically mean the same in our society, because when they learned that I had auditory dyslexia it meant the death to my life as I had known it in the past. )

The above spelling and reading scores were far below what would be expected, given her intellectual functioning, warranting a diagnosis of a learning disability in both areas.   (without the ability to do phonic I can't read orally or spell accept by dictation.  This has never effected my ability to read or write, especially with a spell checker!  I was in gifted glasses.) Interestingly, however, her scores were much higher today than they were a year and a half ago. To complicate matters, her score on the Calculation test today was also much higher than what was obtained a year and a half ago. During that test she was observed to confuse the division sign with the subtraction sign (that psychologist made it up too! Most of these contractor commit fraud to make a buck. How could I possibly do this well in college math?) and the subtraction sign with the multiplication sign. Problems in scattered attention were observed during this evaluation on the Arithmetic subtest, see above. Moreover, Dr. Main reported paradoxical findings on the Digit Span subtest where she was able to recall only 5 sequenced numbers forward, but was able. to recall 8 sequenced numbers correctly in their reversed order.

 

To rule out problems in mental tracking, the Trails B test of mental tracking was administered. On this subtest she made no errors, but scored far below what would be expected with her obtained IQ. She completed Trails B in 73", corresponding to about the 45%, far below what would be expected given her high obtained IQ. (I wasn't exactly cooperating either. I get this way when I feel like a bug under a microscope.)

 

Nonetheless, Ms. Brewer was requested to produce samples of her written work, and she complied. Her written work was well constructed if it was written in computerese (his spelling not mine) "bullet" form. (we call this technical writing using verb phrases) However written work produced in more correspondence form revealed poor grammatical structure. (but not as poor as this grammar he is using Moreover and Nonetheless.) She

 

 

 

 Joan J;3rewer .

 

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would appear. at a minimum. to need assistance with constructing an letter of introduction if she were to reply in writing to an employment notice.  (I wonder how Bill Gates felt about my writing when he read this? He did refer me for a job interview in 1989 after I wrote to him asking for help.)

 

DSM-III-R Diagnoses
 

 

Summary

As is readily apparent 'from the above presentation, Ms. Brewer is a most complex client whose clinical features would probably produce a wide variation of clinical impressions and diagnoses, depending upon who was conducting the evaluation. Her thought speed is so quick, she is so bright, and her thinking can be so tangential. especially when she is anxious or upset, (When I'm being securitized by a male psychologist with his hands between his legs.) that maintaining a consistent picture of her psychological functioning can be a very taxing process. As Dr. Main wrote in his evaluation a year and a half ago, she may well burn out many people working with her. and these comments maintain current value. Seeing through the smoke and recommending a simple, straightforward resolution to her-vocational difficulties is the key, if at all possible. What follows is an attempt to do that very thing.

 

1. It is highly recommended Ms. Brewer continue with ongoing therapy, with a number of purposes in mind. First, she will need assistance with a cognitive and affective resolution to the difficulties she incurred in her last place of employment where she claimed she was sexually harassed. Secondly. it is recommended this therapy be kept in place should she return to gainful employment so that any behavioral difficulties that do arise at work can be worked out as they surface.

 

2. Ms. Brewer would seem to be an excellent candidate for group therapy where she can perhaps benefit from social feedback in a safe, protected milieu. However,. Ms. Brewer has a tendency to view her

 

Joan Brewer

 

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histrionic and narcissistic defenses as creativity", and thus may feel slighted if she were asked to entertain alternate hypotheses, and may feel attacked. nonetheless, in the short run. she would seem better suited by a simple strategy' that attempted to resolve her vocational predicament in a fairly isolated social environment. where she worked primarily alone. Ms. Brewer discussed the possibility or working in computer assisted graphics, and that sort of work could be conducted in a fairly isolated environment where her problems relating to groups do not surface.

 

3. Ms. Brewer needs to work at jobs that are primarily visual- spatial than verbal in nature. Even when rattled, visual stimuli seem to anchor her attention, preventing her from becoming even more fragmented. In contrast, work that is more verbally loaded is more prone to make her feel anxious, following which a number of counterproductive behaviors are elicited which can make her look flaky, flighty, unsubstantial, and unreliable. Again. something like computerized graphics would seem to be a workable accommodation for these parameters.

 

4.  Ms. Brewer needs to avoid work that would require her to communicate in business correspondence, if at all possible. She does appear to have a reading and written language learning disability, but in addition, almost any thought she produces under pressure can become tangential and incohesive to the point of being difficult to follow.  (well if Rodger has a lower IQ which was obvious in this assessment he would have difficulty following my thinking.) Again, work in computerized graphics or something of the sort, would satisfy those- parameters.

 

5. Ms. Brewer will need assistance in mock interviewing. (This isn't true at all. I've always done well in job interview and have gotten most jobs I interviewed for.) Employment interviewing is a primarily verbal event under anxiety provoking conditions. As seen repeatedly above. Ms. Brewer does not do well under those conditions. If she attempts to find work that is more visually-spatially loaded, then she can bring a portfolio that can speak for itself, which will be of some help. However, she will still need to present herself verbally during such situations and will likely need many mock interviews and extensive coaching to ensure she presents appropriately.

 

6. If at all possible. Ms. Brewer would be best served by finding work in an environment staffed primarily by women. (Oh my God... me work with women? HELP!) Her relationships with men in the work place have been complicated at the very least. (I've never had a problem with males accept when I was way more educated or over qualified. This is total sexist bullshit. )

 

Joan Brewer-

 

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The above recommendations probably carry with" them' a guarded prognosis at best. The severity or Ms. Brewer's characterological acting-out in the face of external stressors may compromise her work adjustment to the point of obviating any attempt at stable employment. It has taken many sessions, a considerable amount of consulting, and much thought on this psychologist's part to generate solutions to her predicament that at all seem viable. When anxious. she can seem so fragmented that it may be difficult to see how any solution might work for her.

 

In this psychologist's experience. it is quite rare to see histrionic functioning in a client so bright. (this was not my normal mental state. I had just gone through being drugged, raped, hazed on a business trip by two men causing me an injury, and then was physically and sexually assaulted in my room and did more major damage to my cervical spin that required spinal surgery and left me with a permanent disability.  Gee, I guess I was just a little bit hysterical and narcissistic about this traumatic ordeal.  AND Rodger Meinz was the one who told me to complain about it. Well, I never complained about sexual harassment in the past because I didn't think it was good idea, but did what he suggested. I was fired without even being able to talk to my female manager by the man who assaulted me in D.C.  Rodger Meinz puts the blame on me for being fired but he was the one who was really at fault. Women have NO civil rights in this country no matter what the laws say.)  When she transforms the energy of her anxiety into histrionic flight replete with narcissistic defenses against shame, she can appear to be perhaps more, pathologically constructed than she may in fact be. Even when she feels confident, she has a very fast thought speed and expansive thoughts. but under those conditions her considerable intelligence for matters requiring visual-spatial analysis, synthesis, and integration clearly reveals itself. Since clinical interviewing rarely leaves the verbal world of interaction, this other aspect of her cognitive and affective behavior will likely be rarely observed. However, whether or not a work environment can be clearly identified that carries with it a low probability of eliciting her counterproductive behaviors is an open question. If it cannot be resolved. then her chances for gainful employment may be quite limited.

 

It may be very pragmatic to support Ms. Brewer with a brief trial of psychiatric treatment designed. in part. to determine if over time
the recommendations offered in this report have reliable merit. It takes several clinical interviews to get a consistent "fix" on her behavior, and this attempt to strategize around her employment difficulties may not prove itself to be realistic nonetheless it may be a good place to start.

 

 

 

Rodger Meinz. Ph.D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist

 

[note: I saw a women psychologist for over a year at my own request. It was covered under my Labor and Industry Insurance. People recover from this kind of trauma.  She felt that getting back into a work situation was the best therapy. 

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It's like when you fall off a bike.  You have to get back up and go. As a women who went through something like this, to find myself repeatedly defamed again and again but males  is amazing. They can't control their lust, so they blame their obsession with sex on any women that is attractive.

I was denied this by DVR. I became politically motivated when I couldn't get criminal charges against the males for this kind of assault and was told again and again it was a civil issue--just because it was work related?  This was not a civil issue at all. When I became aware that even disclosing this to Meinz and DVR would destroyed my career, I decided to make sure this civil issue was changed.
I had never had a situation like this happen in my life ever! One thing I knew from the beginning: Men who are highly intelligent don't have any respect for males who rape and assault women.  And they also don't have any respect for men who support rapist.  So I have this web. And I disclose everything. This psychologist talks about me "MY SHAME!"  I don't feel now and have never felt shame about what happened to me. I fell rage and absolute disgust.   I didn't ask for this.  I just wanted to do a job. But hey, if were are going to put women on SSI because they have been raped, sexually abuse or sexually harassed on the job, then that is the economic cost of discrimination and the MEN get to pay for it in the end. Have fun boys but remember you do pay taxes.  And I've lived off your tax dollars since my divorce in 1983--20 years.  When you are fighting that traffic going to work, just thing of me getting up when I want, taking my time and doing the kind of research I want, not what Microsoft or some other male dominated corporation want me to do and sitting here on my computer playing games with my friends on the Internet and doing my political networking, sipping my tea, doing my art and you pay for it all. Even the assaults on me physically don't seem to have long lasting effect, because I'm smart enough to compensate for all of it. To me this is an adventure, just like Alice's.  And I have 100% of my energy going into my creative work and you don't even know what that is.  Next time you harass a women, better consider if she isn't smarter than you.

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