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Jason Has His Own Parties
May long weekend, this is all about the Jason. First off, this under aged alcoholic started drinking at 8:00am, funneled twenty-two beer and decided to take a “power nap”. Jason wanted to wake up drunk with a party going on.
While he was sleeping everyone else got piss drunk Around 5:00am (the next day) Nolan, Edgar, Andrew and Keith were running around shooting each other with pellet guns in their drunken state. Edgar was fucking around and accidentally shot Keith, in the balls… with a high-powered rifle. They laughed for about ten minutes and decided to wake Jason up and tell him about it. It was around 6:00am when they poked Jason a couple times. He sprung up, arms flailing and screamed out at the top of his lungs, “LET’S FUNNEL!!!”
Nolan then reminded Jason that he slept through the night, it was 6:20 in the morning and everyone was going to sleep. Jason’s response, “Well fuck, we gotta funnel anyways!”
So Andrew threw a two-six of Skyy Vodka and a little bit of Lamb’s (in case you’re stupid, rum) into a funnel, Jason took it all.
Five minutes later Jason was falling over and slurring his words. He was still drunk until four o’clock the next day. That night Jason figured he should do some mushrooms. But that will be left for another “Jason’s Adventures!”
Moral of the story: Keith getting shot in the balls with a high-powered rifle is fucking hilarious.
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