return to poetrydust
Blank
Blank.
My mind's just frank.
And I gaze into the clouds
Hoping for a moon to shine soon.
Hoping for hope
To settle this queasy heart
That shouldn't have been so queasy from the start.
My skin feels tingly yet it feels dead,
My mind's thinking yet it feels sky-black,
My heart thumps wildly but I feel dull instead
My feet not touching the ground as I wonder what I lack.
I've never felt so alive, but my heart's breaking into two
And I've got so much gray yet I can't cry.
I've changed into a million different clothes too
But the pain's still there no matter what I try.
I feel suffocated
Strangely intoxicated
Suddenly smelling millions of smells,
Coffee, cats, shampoo, alerts my every living cell.
But no matter what level, what rank
My sight, sound, breathe and smell's rose to
The black night sky still feels with me just one word
One word for all my thoughts…
Blank.
---
Note: Dated early April 2000. There's a piece of roof outside my window, rather disconnected from the roof under the upstairs living room window next to my room. It's shady and flat, perfect to sit on. I don't sit on it so often now. I used to spend my New Year's on the roof with a blanket and a cat (yeah, I've never celebrated it out).