They Might Be Giants: Rants

Pervious 11/18/2001 - Bishonen Linnell
11/13/2001 - Linnel? Immortal?
11/11/2001 - Large Eyes, Small Hands
11/11/2001 - Columbus and Their Electricity

Good John, Bad John - November 21, 2001

Ah, yes. The question of the hour. Is there really a good John? A bad John? Or are they bother just dirty, rotten bastards?

Truthfully, I think they're both basically nice guys. Sure, everybody has their little quirks, such as Linnell practically running away after shows so he doesn't have to interact with the audience.

I can just imagine this little scene:

Flans: ::fumbling with keys to car, muttering to himself:: Shit, where's the fucking...

Linnell: Come on, John, unlock the door, please. John? Flans? John, for God's sake, they've spotted us, OPEN THE DAMNED DOOR! ::flings himself over hood and sprints down sidewalk::

Okay, so maybe he wouldn't go to that much of an extreme, but... ::stifles laugh::

But I can understand that; I myself could deal with a whole lot less social interaction, and I'm not famous. I can just imagine what it's like for the poor man, he seems like such a private person. And Flans... Well, he can seem a little... rough, shall we say. Funny, outgoing, but... rough.

I can't decide. I think they both would be nice guys to talk to, so we shall skip over to Mr. Flans for that question. What has Mr. Flans got to say? Well, as far as this interview is considered, Mr. Flans says:

"We are both polite, nice fellows. TMBG is a team effort, and John and I share a lot of responsibilities, but we also have different skills and abilities. As far as business goes, I am the self-declared "bad John." In lot of day to day logistics, especially on tour, the buck stops with me, making me the heavy in some situations. I've had to fire people, which isn't ever fun, but I am willing to do it for the sake of the band."

Now, for a alive concert excerpt.

Linnell: Here's a song that we do, it's a brand-new song, like many songs we're premiering tonight at Lupo's. This song --

Flans: ::joking:: It's off our new album 'Baby Fingers'.

Linnell: It's off of, uh, the Baby Fingers live EP, which is called, 'Now You're All Set,' and the name of this is song is 'Finished with Lies.' ::fiddles with accordion:: Hey we can segue into the next song, if it's in the exact same key, oh! Except, wait. Wait a minute. Instrument change, I forgot. Do you get the feeling we're planning all this at the last minute?

Flans: I think to call it a plan would be, uh...

Linnell: ::suggesting:: Would be stretching.

Flans: Yeah. I think we're faking it at the last minute.

Linnell: I think we're faking it. Yeah, that's true.

Flans: It's sort of a combination of, I think, a dynamic combination of faking it and phoning it in, I would say. ::pause:: This is our official Smothers Brothers routine, I can't believe John doesn't remember the next line. I said, 'This would be between faking it and phoning it in,' John, you know the script, please!

Linnell: ::brightly:: You know we kid around a lot on stage, people.

Flans: I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.

Linnell: But uh...

Flans: Stick to the script!

Linnell: I'm the sincere guy in the band --

Flans: Stick to the script --

Linnell: ::crowing:: I want to speak out to the people who are tired of the bullshit coming off the stage. I love you people, man! I love you guys!

Flans: ::thundering over laughter and cheering:: Don't fall for it! Don't fall for it, ladies and gentlemen. I'm the one who loves you. Me! The angry one, with all the swear words. But back, but back to our characters, John.

Linnell: Okay. What would John Linnell do in a situation like this?

Flans: I'm wearing my little chain on my wrist, 'What Would John Linnell Do?' I ask myself that every day.

Linnell: ::droning:: For John is mischievous, and crafty. Okay, here we go...

Flans: Back to the music.

Linnell: ::agreeing:: Back to the music. Our forte.

I think that conversation says it all. Take that any way you want to. Personally, I think they're both insane.

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