I wish I could fly up to the stars
And be alone just for a moment.
I wish I had a head upon my shoulders
That knew who I was and where I was going.
I wish I knew someone who loved me.
If I only knew someone who cared.
But my life forbids me from having any real friends
And I am stuck down below in the dirt.
When I get up so high, I never want to come down.
I live to survive in the life I was given.
When I climb up so high, I never want to fall down,
Cuz I don't want to feel the pain again.
I need something more, perhaps I need life.
I need someone to hold, whom I can touch
Without having the fear of being rejected.
Just once in my life I need something like that.
I need something more, I need something less,
I don't know who I am anymore.
I will know me when I find me, but until then,
I have to live my pitiful life in despair.
When I get up so high, I never want to come down.
I live to survive in the life I was given.
When I climb up so high, I never want to fall down,
Cuz I don't want to feel the pain again.
Whenever I get my hopes up and am willing to trust,
I give up a little part of my heart.
And I become part of the person whom I can love,
And I am happy, if for only a while.
Cuz someday I know that we never can last.
I know we are doomed to a failed relationship.
Cuz no one can love me, except for my family,
And I always try to get love.
When I get up so high, I never want to come down.
I live to survive in the life I was given.
When I climb up so high, I never want to fall down,
Cuz I don't want to feel the pain again.
-9/12/98
JC
-9/15/98
I Don't Want to Die
-9/16/98
I Want to Love You
-9/19/98
All of the Day and All of the Night
-9/19/98
Learn How to Live
-9/27/98
Where Dolphins Roam
-9/29/98
(trochaic/dactylic octameter)
--Note to self: Add Accents
JC rides the waves among the high blue sky and soaring cry of the
Eagle who is way up high and looking down upon her body as
I am sitting on my island in the middle of the sea. And
She comes riding by without so much as a look at me. I
Call to her and ask her why she doesn't seem to notice me, but
She just turns her head at me and smiles and continues on her
Way, so I decide to make a ship for sailing out to meet her
There, but she decides never to come anymore, which breaks my
Heart. But she had noticed from a distance that I had become dis-
Traught and always was looking at the eagle flying high in the
Sky. So she decided one day to come to me and ask me if I'd
Talk with her and hold her hand and tell her all about my life. So
I said how I thought the world was round, and she just laughed at the
Thought of sailing all the way around the Earth because it was so
Big and vast and endless, like a huge enchanted ocean. But I
Said to her that it was true and "That," I said, "I can prove." We
Held each other's bodies close and sailed around from coast to coast to
Coast until we found where we had been before and she said how she
Thought that it could never be true, she thought, she said, "Til I met you." And
So we kissed and after that we stayed together until the end of
Time, and it was great, and it was love, and I had found what I had
Sought, for so long, way too long, but now she was in my
Heart and I was in hers too. And we stayed true forever after. The
End.
We took the man down to the sea.
We took the man and threw him away.
Afterlife for him now. We'll never see
If he's deep below the waves.
We lived while he died.
Darwin and life rule supreme.
But no matter what, don't cry,
Cuz I don't want to scream.
In the station we waited.
Everyone saw us sitting there.
I thought we would be rich soon,
But there's nothing more here.
We committed a crime
For which we cannot be punished,
Because no matter what the time,
We cannot be punished.
Now there's no time anymore.
The lights have gone out.
We cannot find a door.
And now there is no doubt.
We lost to the red and blue lights.
And that's what we couldn't know.
This was the last of our nights,
For now it was time to go.
I am insane, and the world knows I am.
I have lost all feeling in my brain.
All I know is in my heart.
I know I want you.
I want to hold you.
I long to kiss you.
I yearn to be with you.
I want to love you.
I want to know who you are.
I want to share my life with you.
I want to tell you everything.
I want to be with you always.
I want to feel you near.
I want you to kiss me.
I want you to hold me.
I want you to love me too.
We are perfect, the two of us.
We could only be more perfect,
Were we closer to each other.
I want to love you,
And I want you to love me too.
Time stands still when I am with you,
And the heavens pour forth mystical light,
And all I know is I want to be with you,
For all of the day and all of the night.
I once was lost in a world insincere,
But since I found you again, I know
That we must stay forever near,
And into the mystical light we'll go.
The light shines from a faraway place,
A place that neither of us has seen.
And the mystical light from this faraway place
Will always be and has always been.
What we have will last forever,
And we will be with each other all the way,
And that is why I want us to be together,
For all of the night and all of the day.
No one knows, no one ever will,
How I feel about you and I.
Cuz I am on top of my hill,
And there we will stay, just you and I.
I don't want to climb down from my hill;
It's taken me too much time to get here.
I love it here with you forever still,
And I don't want to go back to the world insincere.
I like the view from my hill up high,
With the future above us and the past below,
When I am next to you and you are at my side,
Higher is the only sane way to go.
For above us is the mystical light,
Shining down on us from the clouds.
Shining quiet, but shining bright,
Showing us the way from above through the clouds.
Time stands still when I am with you,
And all I know is you and I,
And all I can think about is you,
And all I know is the future in the sky.
And I don't want to climb down from this hill.
It took me way to long to find my way.
And all we have is optimism, wishes, and will,
For all of the night and all of the day.
Above our heads on our hill
Is the future in the mystical light.
And it says I will be with you still,
All of the day and all of the night.
Smell the salty sea air all around yourself.
See the beautiful sky up above your head.
Watch the trees go by as you sit in your boat.
Think of nothing other than the peace you feel.
Imagine the music playing through the air.
Feel the wild freedom that Canada brings.
Know how I felt on a cool clear night,
When the moon shone full and bright over the lake.
Swing back and fish for the fish down below
In the water, deep and wonderfully blue.
Enjoy the company of your family beside you,
For this may be the last time you are close.
Learn how to relax and how to feel good.
Eat all you can eat and drink all you can drink.
Apply everything you now know to your life,
And never go wrong again.
Peace exists where dolphins roam
And the ocean waves beat steadily,
On a desert island among sea foam,
Where utopian paradise is readily
Available.
The palm branches hang in exquisite degree
And the foam forms the lace around the isle.
There is no one there but you and me,
And we stare at each other all the while,
Loving it.
Smiling forever on this world
The island protects our souls.
With the sun shining on you, my pearl,
The days will never grow old
With you.
The radiance of your eyes shines bright.
Your beautiful face makes me smile.
Your voice whispering softly tonight,
Was the only thing I heard on the isle:
"Love."
Yes there is peace where dolphins roam,
And yes there is paradise too,
And amongst all this is where I am home,
For I am there with you.
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