"How the Mighty Have Fallen"

5/6 - "I just don't know what to say." Those few words spoken by Team nWo manager Jim "Hollywood" Sorochen after tonight's debacle in spacious Warren Park. Teddy's Bar, led by clutch hitting and flawless fielding defeated nWo Softball Inc. by tenning them 11-1. The stands were practically empty and rumors were hushed around that the Softball Beer Gods were punishing the dejected team.

"Sure the Beer Gods are angry," said Bill "Sojo" Gamba after the game, "nobody brought any fucking beer. What the hell is that? You can't play softball and not drink beer. We're being punished obviously."

Punished or not, nWo Softball Inc. dropped their first of the season bringing their record to 3-1. With the win Teddy's improved their record to 3-1 to tie Team nWo in the standings. There are only three undefeated teams left including newcomers Fleet Seven Eleven. Join us next week when Team nWo attempts to save face by beating up on Fords Fire Co.

Editor's Note: Stats are not yet available from the game due to a "bad taste in the mouth" of Hollywood...



"Almeida Pitches No Hitter"

4/29 - With the sun glaring from the west, a pudgy hard nosed umpire, and a rag tag fugitive fleet of last minute fill ins - Carlos Almeida proved that adversity can indeed be overcome. With team nWo riddled with injuries Carlos "Los" Almeida stepped up to the challenge pitching a beautiful no hitter Tuesday night in spacious Warren Park. Los was filling in for absent starting pitcher Bill "Sojo" Gamba who was hitting the books for an upcoming Sergeant's exam...and team nWo was 100% behind him.

"I was a little concerned," said Team now manager Jim "Hollywood" Sorochen, "he just started pitching with the mat and I know from experience that it takes time to get used to. But Los came through, he pitched a brilliant game." Los who began pitching with mat rules just two days ago showed no signs of being uncomfortable. "I pitched for the first strike," said a humble Los, "after I got that first strike I just climbed the ladder. I don't know, I just was on tonight." Well he certainly was on tonight shutting out a dejected Met Life club over five innings. He was helped out by some spectacular fielding and even though three errors were committed, first base was as close to home as anyone got. "I really didn't think about a no hitter," said Los, "I just thought about winning. I saw the bobbles by the infielders but was happy when the beautiful and intelligent Official Scorekeeper confirmed the no hitter at the end of the game. It was just awesome."

After the game team nWo autographed the game ball for Los as a keepsake. "I was glad to be available to fill in as Sojo was out but getting a no hitter...it's just an added bonus. I'd like to thank all the guys that came through with so many of the regulars out. They played awesome tonight and played a huge role in the win tonight."

Indeed, an exciting night as nWo Softball continues to make history and improve their record to 3-0 in the process. Join us next week when Team nWo takes on their arch rivals Teddy's Bar (2-0) at 6:15 pm, Warren Park, Field 1.

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