warnings: abuse of HP characters, "Hints of Slash," vocabulary
Day 39, Saturday Nominations..
Draco wakes up this morning. The sun shines through the window, the birds are singing, and he feels WELL again!
Draco: mm (stretches luxuriously) Nothing like plotting revenge to set one's health right. (climbs down from bed; notes time - 830) hm.. we are all sleeping in these days..
Snape: mmm (eye open)
Draco: Ah, Professor Snape - you are awake?
Snape(croak): I have your illness.
Draco: Oh.. That's too bad. Sleep in then.
Meanwhile, Tonks is also waking up. She heads for the bathroom - to find the sink filled with pink liquid.
Tonks: ewww! Big Brother fruit punch rears its ugly head! I have to drain it now!! (reaches into it - it's especially sticky this morning - and pulls the plug in the sink. she notices the mirror; in red lipstick a number: 11-8) Ah! I hope that's not their idea of a grand prank! I wonder where they got lipstick?? Maybe Dolores left hers...
Breakfast sees only Dumbledore, Tonks, and Draco. Tonks has cooked eggs and Dumbledore's made tea... That's it.
Draco: I'm sick for three days and look what happens: the kitchen falls into desuetude - half the house doesn't bother to wake up anymore... even the tea is weak today.. (he shakes his head)
Dumbledore(twinkling): We need your Draconian direction in the kitchen, it would seem..
Draco(in all seriousness): Yes.
Tonks: Where are the guys today?
Dumbledore: Tom tells me he's suffering from your illness, Draco. He thinks it may be the end.
Draco: He can't die.
Dumbledore: As I always tell him, "there's a first for everything."
Draco(sound of exasperation): Oh, come now - if he didn't kill me, it's certainly not going to kill him.
Tonks: Does this mean the rest of the guys have it too?
Draco: Professor Snape said he does.
Tonks: The other two are probably just sleeping in... too much alcohol... maybe that's the problem.
Cut to Bedroom Number Two- Snape, Black, and Lupin are in bed, but awake. Two of them have hangovers in addition to the colds.
Black(groan): mooooooooooony......
Lupin: aaaarrghh
Snape: rrgmmmm
Black: I think I'm done for - any tissues? (sniffles)
Lupin: ...youre down there..
Black: oh, I see- (tries to roll over to wake up - falls out of bed in lump) rahh
Snape: (scowling)
Black: oh shut up
Snape: (nose twitches)
Black(looks around blearily): Where - where tissuess?
Snape(earth shaking): AAAAAAAAAAAACHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Lupin(sits up in terror) WHAT! asdfw!!
Black: SHHHHH!! I ha' a headache! (waves hand dismissively at Snape)
Snape: (sniffle) as do I...
Lupin(groan): as do we all....
(Suddenly a knock at the door - Tonks sticks her head in)
Tonks: Are you guys ok? I heard some horrific noise-
Black: that was Snape sneezing.
Tonks: (incredulous glance to Snape, who has since buried himself under the covers) uh.. are you guys all sick? (steps back out of room) QUARANTINE!!
Black: No - i just.. shhh.. Ima just a little hungover..(head to hand)
Lupin: shouldnt haave tried to feedhim...
Snape(from under covers): GERMS.
Tonks: (from behind door): Yeah, you guys just.. eh.. sleep in today... (sneaks away)
Black: we should turn this into a prank...
Lupin: ACHOO!
Black: Agh, you're both sick!
Lupin(sniffles): tissues-
Black: we don't have any!
Snape: dresser-
Black: No, there's nothing here. Malfoy probably used them all.. (heroic sigh) I'll just have to travel forth - forge my way through the harsh and unwelcoming outside world-
Snape: GO
Black: i'm not bringing you any tissues -
(A bony hand shoots out from under the covers; the wand it clutches points directly at Black)
Black: damn Snivellus.. (storms out of room)
Lupin: ACHOO! aghh-
Snape: (grumble)
Sun Room, midday
Voldemort has caught the cold as well. He has been camping out in the sun room, but is too weak to drag himself anywhere to get food, and so he's getting weaker.. he's run out of tissues.. his headache is becoming more severe and his eyes are watering.. His nose is stuffed up and it hurts to breathe through his mouth. He hasn't had a drink for 17 hours, and that was Big Brother Fruit Punch.
He hates being sick.
But he is awake when Draco sweeps in. The youth sits primly across from him and stares down at him expectantly.
Voldemort(gasping): Draco, child...
Draco(not pleased): Yes....?
Voldemort(reaches a shaking hand towards him): Child.... soouuuuuuuuuppppp...
Draco(eyes narrow): .... You would like.. a bowl of soup?
Voldemort(rasping): yesssssssssssss..
Draco(stands up, towering over the sick dark lord): We have broccoli cheddar...
Voldemort(dreamily): lovely...
Draco: Melts in your mouth...
Voldemort: mm
Draco: ..delicious...sweet and tender pieces of broccoli, their flavor enhanced by the creamy tangy cheese..
Voldemort: and -
Draco(archly): .... and??
Voldemort: water-
Draco: Of course.. a glass of fresh ice water..soothing your dry-
Voldemort: GO!
Draco(eyes narrow): Now?
Voldemort(looks up): yesss
Draco: (suddenly sits back down, pouting) I don't feel like getting up..
Voldemort(growl): Dracoooo...
Draco: Surely you can wait.. you understand... I'm still recovering from my own illness.. I can't possibly be expected to run around serving people as if I were some underappreciated house elf....
Voldemort: aghh-- GO
Draco(stands up again): Where Is The Ice Cream??
Voldemort(eyes narrow):.....................................Go
Draco(raised eyebrow): Very well. (sweeps out)
Voldemort:.. killl........
In the hall, Draco meets Dumbledore, who is carrying a tea tray-
Dumbledore: Ah, Draco. Have you just been to see Tom?
Draco(eyes sweep over tray): ah... Yes. He's asleep.. perhaps your tea would be better appreciated by the invalids upstairs?
Dumbledore(smiles knowingly): If you say so....(turns around)
Draco: Good.
Tonks meanwhile is taking the opportunity to do laundry. While she's waiting, she is inspecting the closet in the hall near the Diary Room. Of course Voldemort has moved the refrigerator, so she doesn't find any ice cream... but she does make an interesting discovery nonetheless.
Tonks(holding small cylindrical can): .. spray paint??? (finds five more cans) Hm what colors!? green... orange.. (drops a baseball bat) yikes! Ah... (rustles around in junk) RED! black....... and.. purple.. mm.. these could be useful.. heheh
30 minutes later, Draco returns to the sun room. He has a tray with two bowls of broccoli cheddar soup and two glasses of ice water. He sets the tray down - not on the coffee table where voldemort might reach it, but on the opposite sofa.
Voldemort: ahhh you have brou-
Draco: I thought you might get hungry if you watched me. So I brought you some... (takes a spoonful) mmmmmmmmm
Voldemort(gritted teeth): damnnnnnnn
Draco: Ahhh.. such hot, steaming soup makes me thirsty.. good thing I have this fresh ice water here (reaches for a glass; takes big gulp, sure to make it audible) Ahhhhhhhhhhh
Voldemort: asll.... (clenching fists)
Draco: Excellent meal... (looks at Voldemort) All it's missing is ice cream....
Voldemort: I ... will ... KILLL--
Draco(mock concern): ... You look awfully thirsty, my Lord... (takes another long swig)
Voldemort(breathing rapidly): gasdg....reaaaaachhh (sticks out arm for glass)
Draco(fake pout): Oh, can't you reach??
Voldemort: AHGL:AS!~! FRONT PORCH --
Draco(up immediately): The front porch!! You've put my refrigerator outSIDE?
Voldemort: GIVE>>>--
Draco(puts tray back on coffee table): Good. (storms out for ice cream)
Voldemort: aghh - (still can't reach): NOooooooooooooo!!
Random Scene- Bedroom Number Two -
Our three "invalids" are in quite as bad a condition as Voldemort. Snape is lying in his bed, covers pushed back to allow him to breath - mouth open of course because he's so congested. Sirius is grimacing as his eyes water, mouth open, drooling and not giving a damn.. Lupin lies on his stomach, arm hanging listlessly over side of bed, head turned so he doesn't suffocate, staring glassy-eyed into space... The air is heavy with sickness; the only sound is the intermittant sniffling and concomitant cursing.
Black(sneezes): damnm ..gonna kill that kid..
Snape: no..
Lupin: (sniffles)
BigBrother; ATTENTION, HOUSEMATES - VOTING TIME!
Black: nooooooooo
BigBrother: THE SICK HOUSEMATES MAY VOTE FROM WHERE THEY ARE.
(Black and Snape glare at each other)
Black: VOLDE--(Cough) MORT! then SNIVELLUS!
Snape: Black... then Tonks-
(silence)
Black: Moooooooooooonyy!
Lupin: mehha- voldemort and draco....
SunRoom:
Voldemort: .. damn but I haven't consulted anyone yet... ah.. I nominate Nymphadora Tonks for two. HEAR THAT, EVERYONE? TONKS!! and.... Albus for one.
Draco in the living room has heard... When he reaches the Diary Room he finds Dumbledore just enterting and Tonks waiting behind.
Diary Room:
Dumbledore: Today's random selection brought up Draco for two and Severus for one (exit, lets Tonks in. She sits in the chair)
Tonks: Hi audience.. I er... I think I'll nominate VOLDEMORT for two... then .... (eyes narrow in thought) Draco for one, since he's such an attention-demanding little brat. Thank you! (exit. Draco finally storms in, grumpy at having been forced to wait.)
Draco: Ok. I nominate Tonks for two and Dumbledorf for one. (storms back out again)
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A/N: OK, that's Voldemort for 6, Draco for 4, and Tonks for 3. One vote for each. and when you vote, give me a ff.net name or a nickname or something. If you are siblings voting from the same email account make that clear so I count you properly. IF YOU HAVENT VOTED PLEASE DO!