POETRY
SMALL TOWN JOKE

I'll be the one� balled up on my knees
Begging to keep my sanity
Have another twist of pain
I'm just a joke
Waiting to be poked
Fun at my expense
She doesn't love me anymore
Get use to past tense
The ego deflator's rage
In their private sky box cage
Deflowered while I cower
Huddled little ball
I'll adjust
This small towns joke


6/8/01
MyGirlThrill
HOME
STORIES
MILES AWAY

The mask on the wall is mocking me
Two faces
And the singer on the radio
Is miles away
But I'm right here without you
Did I say that's ok?
I lied
Screaming deep down
How I tried
To be
What's that word again?
Magnanimous
It impresses you
Not enough to keep me warm
Oh yeah baby, I'm magnanimous
Here without you

12/12/99
MyGirlThrill
Invisible Sharp Edges

I'm not your Madonna
Or your Messaih
Not your Senorita
Sent to fulfill
Su cada deseo
Nostradomus couldn't predict
The calamity dressed in you
But I digress
While you recede
To a lovely memory
Untouched
By the sea of pain
We swim in today
Pretty you
Pity you
Like a blink
The on off switch
Rules your heart
Realm of possibility gone
Released to vapored circumstance
Happily
Invisible sharp edges
Cut me to the bone
Impossible wound
Cannot heal this life
Time deflects
Wraps temporary hearts
Twined loose
You are a noose
Seconds before the tug
I feel the weight
The burn
The end

9/5/01
MyGirlThrill
BETTER DAYS
Just A Dream

I'm all about you now and then
When
You think of me���
Alone
Wondering
The way you do
About the�inability of one
To change���
You obscure���
The missing clue
Altering the future
Do your hands fumble���
With nervousness
Do you busy your mind
From�me
Like everyone else in this life
Are you  ashamed�
Afraid of the mistakes
The lies�you created
When you were growing
Testing, tasting life���
And love;   Fear
It's a queer feeling���
When it's there��
When it's not
Let's go back to sleep
Escape these rays of truth��
Telling ourselves
It was
Just a dream


7/22/02
MyGirlThrill
POETRY
Random Tunes

She said, "stop right there before I get bitter."  But he didn't listen.
She said, "no one knows where they belong."  But he tried to tune her out.
She said, "why would you wait, and be late for your life?"  But he didn't understand.
Sirens scream inside her head while a woman laughs hysterically from far away
She said, "this morning I woke with a feeling I'd been away too long."  But he didn't know what that was about.
She said, "I'm worried about you.  I'm worried about me."  But he started to slip back into his cave.
She said, "I'll be waiting whenever you're ready."  But he was already beyond reach.
The time ticks toward 2 o'clock, and the naked guitarist bathes in sunlight's painted view.
She said, "this is the way to make a broken heart."  But he was already asleep.
She said, "you're going to pay for all the things you put me through."  But his closed ears missed the clues.
She said, "that's the beauty of living in a made up world."  But he was lost in his fantasy.
Her hands rest, while the washer spins out of control, and her eyes nervously search the room .
She said, "you don't know me or my situation."  But he was comfortably rooted in his black and white reality.
She said, "I've got everything I need,  but I still dream of what's inside."  But he blamed her computer for his wounds.
She said, "do you ever have a good day?"  But he grabbed the gas cap, and drove away, leaving her powerless.
All the sounds from without still her within, and when they go she is anxiously consumed with nameless need.
She said, " your weight is too strong my shoulders have completely given out."  But he wouldn't accept his cowardice.
She said, "you thought you could keep me from loving, keep me in control."  But he couldn't articulate his greed.
She said, "now I have taken control of your dream."  But he was a runaway train ashamed afraid entrenched.
Deep bass booms another lesson on god, and the choir chant's la la la's in their soulful gospel way.
He said, "look at me I've become unpredictable.  You don't know what I'l do next."  But she shrugged off his rant.
He said, "I'm heading for the brink of insanity.  I hope it gets here soon."  But she thought he was attention craved.
He said, "don't you want to take a ride with me through my world?"  But she was already gone.
Random tunes speak to me in whispers
Scream to me, and  shout
Cry to me from a black and white casket of tears
The truth is not always wrapped in pretty colors to soothe our aching hearts.


Thanks to Poe, Mary Chapin Carpenter, Rosanne Cash, and Kina for their random inspiration.
8/5/01
MyGirlThrill
She
Never
Saw
It
Coming
Do
We
Ever?
Sky Blue and Black
[email protected]
The Damage Done
Fragments
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