Murphy's Household Laws

• A child's eagerness to assist in any project varies in inverse proportion to his ability to actually do the work involved.
• Leftovers always expand to fill all available containers plus one.
• A newly washed window gathers dirt at twice the speed of an unwashed one.
• The availability of a ballpoint pen is inversely proportional to how badly it is needed.
• The same clutter that will fill a one-car garage will fill a two-car garage.
• Three children plus two cookies equals a fight.
• The potential for disaster is in direct proportion to the number of TV remote-controls divided by the number of viewers.
• The number of doors left open varies inversely with the outside temperature.
• The capacity of any water-heater is equal to one and a half sibling showers.
• What goes up must come down, except bubble gum and slightly used cereal.