| Dear Laura:
Over the passed years of teaching I have been juggling the idea of changing my career to include a more intimate child care/ home life situation. With the idea it came to my attention that I am the perfect Au Pair (Nanny). I went to GreatAuPair.com and posted an Advertisement of "Personal Chef/Teacher/Personal Assistant/Au Pair." My email box was flooded with offers from families that need someone just like me. Take a peek at (My Au Pair Page) later on when you get a chance. I have the initial twenty-two family candidates narrowed down to three. One family I am leaning towards more then the others. In my resume' / references (you are my 3rd reference down) .. there are 8 years missing from my life. My entire time in Broken Arrow, OK. Not good! I arrived in Oklahoma in 1992, met you in 1993 and that all lasted until just after your birthday in 1999. Enough time has finally passed where we can address our "time" ~ for the cause of employment. I have been dilegently looking for you to ask you to write a letter of reference. Surely you can separate our relationship out .. and write a letter of reference for me with regard to my skills of cooking, home managing, and love for children ~ as I did completely give of myself for 7 years of a "live-in" (position) for you to record some form of friendly accolade on me. I have the teaching references all covered but not the part you can provide.. Disregarding of course the personal information of relationship. Our "end" has NOTHING to do with who you or I am. Our grandest difference now is, I remember everything while you choose to forget. I am asking you to remember. To complete the required 4 references of those who have lived WITH me more then 3 years ... You are really the only one who can help me with this. I am sure you can sift out and still manage to find some wonderful words to speak of. Regardless of all the time you've allowed to pass without healing (I have tried over the years to reach you in every conventional and creative manner to no avail). Regardless . .. I still am and always will be "here" for you, as promised long ago. You know me, I don't toss people. One family that wishes to employ me live in Washington, DC. The wife writes: "I am the Patent Examiner for the United States Patent and Trademark Office (USPTO) and my husband owns a high-tech company called, The OPTIMUS Corporation. The company designed systems for Homeland Security, Public Safety, and National Defense. He was honored at the National Inventor�s Hall of Fame in Canton, Ohio for a technology that he invented that helps keep commercial airplanes from crashing. That comes in very handy!" They are wanting my other references in by next Friday and my Background check and initial Interview are over. I will be starting working for them contingent on being able to provide 2 more references with regard to my "Au Pair" gifts in a home and of a verifiable record of such. Of the which, they want someone who actually lived With me. You do remember, right? Another man, has a little questionaire that he sends references. I do not know all that entails, but it should be easy and fun. ... If you can be left alone for a moment to cooperate with doing it. Do you ever have a moment to yourself? If I can just be bold enough to ask for your help and you kind enough to assist in giving just the facts: "that I lived with you for 7 years and that I performed joyfully and with a happy heart child care duties: cooking healthy meals & shopping, helping bathe children, put them to bed, taking them to school, traveling on vacations all together." (and the etc's) ... Then I will have completed their wishes of pre-employment standards. It may actually release me from the "villian cage" you hold me in to take a moment to write something kind from your memory. You were a VERY warm human being when we were together and I am not sure how that got yanked from you or why you permit those you are "with" to change you so drastically, but I know the REAL you. And I am asking .. "Please, .. can you help me?" The family is taking an overseas trip in May and wishes to have me there by May 18th to accompany them. They are making their decision this coming week. This will be my last year as a teacher in my town of Cape Coral, where I moved when Janeen took ill and then battled with cancer again. She and Michael live here and I've been taking care of their children (Brittany and Nicholas, my God Children) and home for 2 years now. Janeen is in remission once more and I would like to "retire" as a teacher ~ as that is what I have been keeping myself occupied with since leaving Oklahoma ~ at Beulah, in Chicago and here in Florida. Among other things. We all still speak fondly of you and I love watching their wedding video where you were definitely the most .. blah blah blah.. out of the 200 plus people there. Not long ago, as a tear fell quietly down, Janeen came over and caught it with her thumb saying, "I miss her too Mary." ... "We all do." Thought you should know how many people got left in your dust cloud. Cinnie Buman ... Karen & Michael all ask about you and of course Shelley & Kelley. The list goes on & on at those who love you and miss you. Anyway ... If you do not feel good about communicating the reference directly to me (which I am SURE that enough time has gone by where you should be now free to remember the giggles and years of smiles we all had as I lived with you and we tended to our children together (it was NOT all bad) ~ if you are not able to bring yourself to send me the reference letter ... then you can avoid that direct line ... if you wish. But if you could bring yourself for a moment ... to forget the "bad" to help me with my need for a reference, you surely do know my character Laura! So what that I "flipped out" at the end. It's okay, I still am "Mary." My inability to handle what was being thrown at me surely does not outweigh the good, nor the truth. I had a promise of "forever" and a committed relationship just violently jolted from what I knew you to be ~ and years of loving words .. and promises broken in a moments time. It shocked me. Seeing you totally becoming something you are not right before my eyes. I am and always will be sorry. Please try to understand that some people just can't "cope" when their world is being torn apart at the same time a third person is shoved in so swifly. I know I did not cope well during my suffering. But, that is a moment that is over. Friendship lives on in the recorded halls of heaven. Take a peek at God's record sometime. You may get some understanding just as I had to .. as to why relationships will not ever go on and prosper ... until you deal with the ones left broken and bruised. I am patiently waiting still. For my reference I would like to include the two other children we watched together (Destiny and Justin). What a joy those years of taking care of lots of children were!! And I sure don't want 7 years of my life to vanish as though nothing of value was accomplished. I learned so much from watching and listening to you. So much of value that is impossible to negate from my spirit. I will not let the enemy of both our souls rob me. Nor you if I can help it. There were years of your personal growth too, that God wishes you to remember. That is why you are now reading this today. I can't count the times I would drop what I was doing for the sake of helping others and go clean someone else's house (your mom included) or steam cleaning Kris's carpets.. stuff that comes natural to me. I don't mind those "home" things and I love helping others. You know this about me. We were and are friends. Just currently neglected. Not my choosing, but one forced upon by the third parties. And even still you will invite others "new" in your life to negate or "force" you to be what you are not. You witnessed it now 3 times in 7 years. I personally, Loved seeing you be uniquely YOU !! I remember the first time you made a contrary decision and said, "NO"... to me, I remember the leap for joy my heart exprienced. Why? Because the REAL LAURA was standing up. Friends love to see their friends grow and stand strong and tall. I was just thinking ... I actually already gave your name as a reference to three families this passed two weeks not thinking for one moment that you were still in denial about the truth and nature of your friend. (me). I really did not know you would still be "anti" Mary (as others have colaberated you are). Please don't "freak out" over reading this or with communicating ... did you ever think as we were in the midst of our years that you would ever slam a door shut on me and become a chilly person? Just a thought: If it would help you.. to help me, I would prefer to have simply a letter of reference from you so that you don't have "home" issues hindering you on that end. You are well able to walk in friendship Laura. Relationships seem to always get us (both) in trouble with the obvious "cycles" that are right here in front of us both to review. Anyway. You can freely share the truth of friendship and of my giving qualities. I know who I am, but these people want to hear it from you. Some even may wish to contact you through an email, I know one man who actually has a standard questionaire that he sends references. But, if you are under the "control" of another human being and not your own self ... Then.. this will be horribly impossible. That is a very sad thought. Our broken relationship/friendship need not hinder in any way the purpose here... in asking for your cooperation to truthfully find in the reservoir of your memory my gifts with teaching children and my faithfulness of character that you are well able to display in a reference letter. I surely have suffered enough just with the fact of not having your love and friendship anymore, and I know you never meant me harm although I still do mourn over the loss achingly. All these years you went on to entangle yourself in new "dramas" .. I have only worked on ONE thing .. that is, walking in healing and freedom. ... and crying out to God for the "chains" of the undone past .. to free me.. and you. I still pray for you daily. Can you say the same? Avoiding talking to me will not avoid the fact that HE is after you. In fact, It is HE who has me writing you today. You can send the letter of reference to: Mary Mieres 1409 SW 29th Street Cape Coral, FL 33914 and / or email it to me at [email protected] ~ or if not wanting me to have your email still .. you can mail it directly to [email protected] .. but if it goes there.. I will not get to review it first... nor will I have it for my file. But I am willing to sacrifice the healing of reading kind words from you towards me for the cause of taking this new position. Don't make yourself do it ...or feel forced.. just do what any friend would do for a friend, regardless of anything in our way. Please make sure to brag about my LOVE of cooking should you choose to cooperate. Step aside Rachel Ray. I don't even need 30 minutes. Let's try 15 instead. Yes I do still watch cooking shows and an occasional figure skating show in tribute to you. :) That's all I needed.. with my inquiry of you. Thanks for laying down your current disposition for this cause and I hope you got to read this in the privacy of your own heart. I trust this request is in good hands. In Him Love & Light Mary write sometime .. it's okay. You can do it. You did promise me you would. oh, and one last thing ... After the stroke of midnight on New Years Eve 1999 ... after quite a time we had ... You asked me, "Will you ever write something for me?" adding, "You write so good" ... "Please write something for me ~" I know it's about 7 plus years later ... Yet, I have written something for you (that is not found on my web site). And it just sits, waiting for the day for you to even turn your head slightly this way; and request a read. If you are interested in it ... simply click here: CLICK .... and type, "sure, I'd love to read it" in the subject line. You just may enjoy it. I have waited patiently for such a time. And for you to yeild to the Spirit of the Lord once more. Please don't become more cold. Warmth is always better. For you ... and the rest of the world around you. You are definately one of the greatest friends I ever had and you once said the same of me. Please remember. Love Always Mary __________________________________________________________________________ If you have time ... here are some "Updates" (letters to and from Tulsa) .. .thought to share a little with you ... by way of other people's inquiries of love towards me.. Dear Mary, How the heck are you? I am still here same place and then some. Where are you now? Please write. How are you? How are you feeling? Why haven't I received your devotionals lately? Have you heard any news on your "friend" here yet? When are you two just going to talk and smooth things over the way Christ would have wanted it?. Write SOON Miss you !!! ***** Hello Darling: Nice to get a note from Broken Arrow !! I battled my health crap for a couple years in NC (yes, I did have colon cancer that kicked my ass for 29 months). I started bleeding in OK before I left. The hardest part was sitting in hospitals while friends had their backs turned to me. No matter the "reason".. Friends should be friends forever. l seem to be "better" after several surgeries and 3 inches cut out (it really came down to a broken spirit ~ God has yet to heal completely). Sometimes He waits for us to do our parts. Remember when I had my ovary explode? Now THAT was love!! Every night, every day .. my friend .. right there. Hell, I could die.. and it would be like a mosquito on her shoulder. How did we grow so cold? I am finding that .. I am still warm. No matter the lies spoken against me nor the terrible human being (a single moment in time) tried to paint on me. I am still Mary.. a woman after God's own heart. Anyway .. God is still busy dealing with the hearts of those involved even if they don't know it. No relationship will ever prosper (except the sinful ones) if we don't deal with what is crying out from deep within. OH God.. don't let me go there. uh... What else? oh.. yeah.. After the cancer battle ~ ... then Seth went off with the Marines (pics) ... then Seth got hurt and came home. Prayed him home!! Thank you Jesus! and again.. No friends standing near him nor I while he was away. He sent out 8 letters to Okla. before leaving and was totally ignored. Except for Carla and Kris .. a portion of the "family" I came to know and love. Even Mark wrote seth an email. no matter how "shallow" it may have seemed it was still an act of love towards him. The Holy Spirit grieves still at the hard hearts that turned cold towards him and I.. While Seth was away .. my letters were going to some other kid for a year before it was straightened out .. How many "Seth's " "Mieres" - "Myers" or close can there possibly be? Now ... Seth is married and I am gonna be a grandma in 2 months. How's THAT for a "how the heck are you?" question answered? I am a teacher in Cape Coral, Florida. I live on the Gulf of Mexico and wave run out my back porch .. .15 feet from a canal ... and 15 minutes out to the dolphins. Remember all the Etheridge songs? I've tried every thing and anything to keep my mind away from Oklahoma .. and in my life.. but.. I daily still think of you all and wonder how you are. What torment still plagues me from afar!! I arrived here in FL, 3 months before hurricane Charley hit my town and now I just use every hurricane as a reason (excuse) to leave town for a vacation. Last wicked wonder was Wilma .. and I was in Las Vegas .. Socrates died in hurricane Wilma.. Not a nice way to come home. I was his "best" pal, but it did take him a few years to stop pecking /plucking himself bald after being neglected by ... the Okla ordeal. He was a great bird !!! (His page) He was just about the last thing left from "dah past" ... poor little white fella ... Oh yeah ... and I still have a long black leather coat that I never get to wear in Florida. Ain't God interesting? anyway.. that's about it for now.. I just finished painting the house this weekend and gotta pull the rest of the tape off the windows.. I will write more later before bed or tomorrow. I will send you photos of my home in the next email. I waited a many years to have my own home. Told ya .. "you don't need a man for that." Now.. for YOU? I am so wondering how YOU are ?? Do tell ?? Any good news to share? No more bad news.. okay? In Him Mary ps.. almost called you today.. figured.. .I'll wait.. getting good at it.. Patience has returned to me.. 100 fold these days. pss.. Valentine Day message: Here's a blessing. Something I wrote: Valentines Day with a specific love on my heart as I typed. ___________________________________________________________________ ******* (removed one letter) ___________________________________________________________________ Hey hey Sweet heart !! Glad you wrote again! I am glad to hear things are going so well but not glad to hear about the trouble. I went to the Windsong apartment ratings.com site last year .. or the year before and it was on there for all the world to know. I felt sick in my guts.. Gosh how I love her. I feel very responsible for all of it. In that, I pushed her in that direction. And then couldn't cope when the net snagged her off. I wish .. so wish, we could talk and encourage one another. Seth just rang my phone .. gotta run and chat with him.. I still am bugging him about making me a grandma before I even hit 42.. that boy still aggravates me by "aging" me before my time. Can you put me in touch with Laura I need try to send her something? or at least ask her for help .. who knows she may be free from her guilded cage after all this time. Perhaps not, God have mercy. Wanna hear something wierd? I was with Laura more days ... then the time we've been apart. Sad sad thought. huh? Am I the only one who remembers things of great value ~ such as that? Anyway.. Seth .. Darn.. he calls .. then puts me on hold.. what a chump! I'll gab with ya til he comes back. and.. hang on to your shorts for the next email ... I will make a new web page of my grand baby.. her name is gonna be "Jade" Jade "Dani" ... I will probably talk my daughter in law out of the French Dani by the time of birth... the Jade was not Seth's choosing either, and I am a stickler for the bible tradition "that a man is to choose his children's names" .. or at least have some say so. This "modern day" of changing Gods ways. geez.. I'm all too guilty myself ... But come on .. since when don't men have a say in picking their daughters name? I had Seth's name picked out for 8 months "Michael" .. until the day of his birth.. "Seth" popped off my lips when the nurse asked for his name... so.. perhaps "Jade" may change too... I am praying it does.. NAMES ARE WAY WAY WAY IMPORTANT... and Jade has a terrible definition.. like a curse .. (that Seth is well aware of) .. Jade means: 1 : a broken-down, vicious, or worthless horse 2 a : a disreputable woman b : a flirtatious girl to be "jaded" means twisted away from purpose. transitive senses 1 a : to wear out by overwork or abuse b : to tire or dull through repetition or excess 2 obsolete : to make ridiculous intransitive senses : to become weary or dulled Of course it is a color too: light bluish green.. or a plant .. : any of several succulent plants (genus Crassula) of the orpine family cultivated as foliage plants I know.. Grandma's are suppose to shut up and stay out of it all.. but.. I have yet to obey that wish. The name of this baby .. displeases me .. as you can tell. Seth is a mini man now.. he will rise up and take a firm grip of his little family. He runs his own landscaping business.. pretty humble job for a gunner, and computer tech trained in Afghanistan and with the Army boys at Ft. Sill for a co op function. He blew stuff up too .. and I am trying not to dabble in his future choices too much. He is a good Man of God.. just a bit too tender. keep Praying for him. bye for now. Love & Light Mary My web site: http://www.geocities.com/marymieres/WhoseDat.html (old) but the first pic on top is current Photo Page (old) Seth's Old Site .. He made in High School. Seth's Album |
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