The Company HeadQuarters Welcome to the spacious offices of The Really Big Business Incorporated, located on the bank of the river Glitchy Gloomy, in the beautiful swamps of Southern Florida. Hunting and fishing, especially for the popular "speckled pregnant chad" and other types of wildlife. Attorneys & high political partisanship are the rule of the day. Bring your wading boots and legal briefs, it may be a bumpy ride. Our Company Car After 6 months of loyal and faithful service, each and every single employee is given keys to the company vehicle. Everyone is entered into a lottery pool and straws are drawn, all we ask is that you don't kill your silly selves in competion to drive our beautiful 1999 Volkswagen Beetle. Dent or scratch it, and its YOUR'S. Our Recreation Facilities Our marvelous smoking facility doubles as a wonderful recreation center. As you smoke, you can perform the exercises we've found to keep our employees in top working shape. Boot-Licking, genuflecting, & bending over backwards are all rules of the day. Learning to accept blame and passing the buck are also among the most desired qualities, at The Really Big Business, Incorporated, where brow-beating is a way of life. Our Smoking Area Every new employee upon completion of drug and background criminal checks, is given a carton of cigarrettes of their choice. We offer you only the finest of smoking areas, on the balcony behind the main building, overlooking the city sanition landfill. Imagine yourselves, huddled together on a cold winter morning, puffing your butts and grinding them out in old dead flower pots. Only the finest facilities, at TRBB, Inc. Our Winter Activity Schedule Our fabulous winter activities schedule includes fun for the whole family. Pushing your car up steep inclines on a snow-packed road, digging your car from a ditch in a heavy blizzard, shoveling the sidewalk of our Corporate Headquarters, and taking the CEO's pet poodle out for a doggy-doo in the blistering cold. We even provide you with the plastic sandwich bag (from your own lunch bucket), and silver spoon right from your child's mouth

THE REALLY BIG BUSINESS, INC. We Do It All, To YOU! Our Company Has a Checkered History. We built The Really Big Business, Incorporated, by sloshing through pools of sweat and on the breaking backs of 3rd World slave- labor. We specialize and take abundant pride in our ability to use and connive ignorant peoples from Aboriginine Countries, priming them with illusions of granduer while all the while, grinding their bones into a tasy mush, not unlike "Soylent Green". Like our hero Chuck Heston said in his most famous role, "Its people!! Soylent Green is people!!". If you have to eat a ground-up people product, our's is tastiest, by far. Litigation? Never a Problem. Our sue-happy attorneys at The Really Big Business, Incorporated, will always be willing to file lawsuits against you, your family, your friends and loved ones. We love to sue people. If you buy one of our beautifully deceptive designed products, if it harms, maims, or even kills any one member of your family, we will sue you before you get out of the hospital, or the morgue, whichever comes first. If you eat one of our delicious yet highly noxious products, and you in result become ill, we will ram our own exclusive stomach pump equipment right down your throat, and suck every dollar right through your wallets.