Blonde Jokes


 

  • HOW DO YOU MAKE A BLONDE'S EYES SPARKLE?
    SHINE A FLASHLIGHT IN HER EAR.

  • HOW DO YOU MAKE A BLONDE LAUGH ON FRIDAY?
    TELL HER A JOKE ON MONDAY.

  • WHY DO BLONDES HAVE T.G.I.F. PAINTED ON THEIR SHOES?
    TOES GO IN FIRST.

  • WHAT IS THE SIMILARITY BETWEEN SANTA CLAUSE, THE TOOTH FAIRY AND A SMART BLONDE?
    THEY'RE ALL MAKE BELIEVE.

  • HOW CAN YOU TELL WHEN A BLONDE HAS USED YOUR COMPUTER?
    THERE IS WHITE OUT ON THE SCREEN.

  • WHAT IS THE SIMILARITY BETWEEN COWPIES AND BLONDES?
    THE OLDER THEY GET, THE EASIER THEY ARE TO PICK UP.

  • WHAT DO YOU CALL A BLONDE WHO HAS DYED HER HAIR BLACK?
    ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE.

  • WHY DO BLONDES WASH THEIR HAIR IN THE SINK?
    THAT'S WHERE YOU WASH ALL VEGETABLES.

  • WHAT IS THE MATING CALL OF A BLONDE?
    TAKE ME HOME, I'M DRUNK.

  • WHY WILL A BLONDE LAUGH AT A JOKE THREE TIMES?
    ONCE WHEN YOU TELL IT, ONCE WHEN YOU EXPLAIN THE PUNCH LINE TO HER, AND ONCE WHEN SHE GETS IT.

  • WHY DOES IT TAKE A BLONDE 3 DAYS TO MAKE CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES?
    SHE HAS TO PEEL ALL THE M&MS.

  • HOW DO YOU KEEP A BLONDE BUSY?
    GIVE HER A BAG OF M&MS AND TELL HER TO PUT THEM IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER.

  • WHY DO BLONDES HAVE SQUARE BOOBS?
    THEY FORGET TO TAKE THE KLEENEX OUT OF THE BOX.

  • WHAT DO BLONDES AND BEER BOTTLES HAVE IN COMMON?
    THEY ARE BOTH EMPTY FROM THE NECK UP.

  • WHAT DO YOU CALL A BRUNETTE STANDING BETWEEN TWO BLONDES?
    AN INTERPRETER.

  • WHAT DID THE BLONDE SAY WHEN SHE FOUND OUT SHE WAS PREGNANT?
    I HOPE IT'S MINE.

  • HOW DID THE BLONDE BREAK HER LEG RAKING LEAVES?
    SHE FELL OUT OF THE TREE.

  • WHAT IS THE ONE BIG ADVANTAGE OF MARRYING A BLONDE?
    YOU GET TO PARK IN THE HANDICAPPED SPACES.

  • WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN A BLONDE THROWS A GRENADE AT YOU?
    PULL THE PIN AND THROW IT BACK.

  • IF A BLONDE AND A BRUNETTE BOTH JUMPED OFF A BUILDING AT THE SAME TIME, WHO WOULD HIT THE GROUND FIRST?
    THE BRUNETTE...THE BLONDE WOULD HAVE TO STOP AND ASK DIRECTIONS.

 

HOME - CHILI STORY - SANTA - HISTORY - SKIING - DO THE JOB - CARS - UNCLE - PRE 1945 - LETTER - SNAKES
DOG CARRIER - GETTING ALONG - TELEPHONE - TRANSLATION - RESIPE - BLONDE JOKES - MAKE COPIES
LAWYERS - LAWYERS 2 - THE PLAN - Y2K - CAN'T REMEMBER - MY BOSS - WHEELCHAIR RAMP - LIFE ON MARS - PILLS


Copyright © 2003 Little Old Man Presents