Our relationship, thankfully, is better than some, not as good as others. Our contact is slow, although, I was surprised when my daughter invited me to her home the weekend after Christmas, 2002. That was our first meeting in two years. I spent the weekend with her and got to know her a little better. I haven't heard from her since then, but I'm not surprised. I usually only get an e-mail from her a couple of times a year, even though I send her e-mails every couple of weeks.
Reunion is a rollercoaster ride, but what has helped me the most through the ups and downs of reunion is the support group I've found on the internet called Reunited Birthmothers (RBM). There are over 800 women in this group, all in various stages of reunion with their birthchildren. Their advice and support has been a tremendous help. I have also been reading books about adoptees.
Although I don't have the contact I would like to have with my daughter, I am so glad to know she is well and has turned into a wonderful woman.
Everyone has been touched by adoption in some form. You may know someone who was adopted, or someone who adopted a child. You may even know others who are birthmothers. We are starting to come out of the closet. We were told all those years ago to forget and get on with our lives. But we have felt the trauma of relinquishing our children all our lives.
For those considering adoption, I suggest reading the page in my Web site titled, "An Adoptee's Advice," and also the book "Primal Wound, Understanding the Adopted Child" by Nancy Newton Verrier. These will help those who have adopted or are considering adoption understand the adopted child, and better prepare your child and yourself when your child wants to search for his birthparents.
The following pages are all adoption related. On the "links" page, you'll find links to other birthmother stories, inspirational web sites, lots of adoption search sites, including genealogy sites, military sites, maiden names, and high school year books.
The links at the bottom of every page will take you to any of the pages in this Web site, as well as a link to my other Web site, which I created several years ago.
The songs I have chosen for this Web site are by Sarah McLachlin, an adoptee who found her birthmother.
Thank you for taking this journey through my Web site. Please go back to the home page and sign my guest book. I welcome your comments. Feel free to forward my Web site to others you think would be interested.
