Now, if you DID look at the Cool Chicks pages, then you know the characters (the Chicks, obviously) are based (loosely) on my friends and me. But what does that mean? Does my friend Megan REALLY think she sees Leprechauns? Does Andrea actually have a tie-dyed, heat-seeking reusable handgrenade? The answer to both is no--although Megan does have an imaginary sock puppet named Mrs. Stockingsocks which she uses to insult people when she's in a bad mood (don't ask--it was my idea, but it's too difficult to explain), and I bet Andrea WISHES she had the said handgrenade.
So what are we really like? Well, we're self-described geeks (gee, could you tell?), with the exception of my sister, Jessica, who's only a pseudo-geek (she'll probably kill me for putting her even THAT close to "geekdom" but oh well). How similar are we to our Cool Chicks personas? Well, as you can imagine, not very like at all. We do, however, share an overdeveloped sense of Justice with our characters; we just don't go out fighting crime. We're only mere mortals, after all.
BUT, you can believe we'd turn to the superhero life if only we could. But we wouldn't necessarily want to be our Cool Chicks personas. Well hey, if we're going to do a "What If" scenario here, let's go the whole nine yards! Read on, dear friends, and meet the REAL chicks behind the Cool Chicks... in their own words! My editorial comments are in [brackets].
Nickname(s): Queenie, Char (though no one's really called me this since jr. high... wonder why no one ever called me Lottie; that's much cuter than Char... oh well.)
Age: 21
Favorite Color: forest green
Favorite Books: Harry Potter series, The Lord of the Rings trilogy, Princess Bride, the Books of Great Alta
Favorite Films: The Lord of the Rings, Princess Bride, Mystery Men, X Men, Shanghai Noon, The Matrix
Favorite TV Shows: Outlaw Star, Cowboy Bebop (currently), Robin of Sherwood, Absolutely Fabulous, The Slayers, Dragonball Z, Powerpuff Girls
Favorite Quotes:
"We've had one breakfast, yes, but what about second breakfast? . . . What about luncheon, and afternoon tea, and dinner and supper, he knows about them doesn't he?" (Pippin, The Fellowship of the Ring)
"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." (Inigo, Princess Bride)
"Nothing's Forgotten. Nothing is ever forgotten." (Robin, Robin of Sherwood)
"Francis, leave zem alone, zey are poo-poo heads!" (Heimlich, A Bug's Life)
"It's amazing how EVERY time you open your mouth you PROVE you're an IDI-ot!" (Vegeta, Dragonball Z)
"Wasn't me!" (Fred, Rocketman)
"I guess I'll have to raise the stakes. Best poser gets a candy!" (Capt. Ginyu, Dragonball Z)
"Ha! THAT'LL teach you; you'll never do THAT again, WILL you!" (Edmund, The Black Adder)
The "To the pain" speech from Princess Bride. (See Andrea's quote section--I'm not keying it in twice!)
If I could be a superhero, this is the ONE power I'd have (and why I chose it): I'd want to be a Saiyan (or maybe a half-Saiyan--I don't think I'd like the weird spiky black hair that all pure Saiyans have), like in DBZ; then I could turn Super Saiyan (even if it does mean getting platinum-blond hair and pupil-free blue-green eyes) when I got really pissed and just start blasting. (I've always wanted lasers in my hands, you know.) I'd be a legend in my own mind (right Vegeta?).
Nickname(s): Empress of Ireland
Age: 21
Favorite Color: neon clear
Favorite Books: Harry Potter, Anne McCaffery's Dragonrider series, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
Favorite Films: Princess Bride, Star Wars Trilogy, Dogma, Mallrats, The Matrix
Favorite TV Shows: Dark Angel, Simpsons, Malcom in the Middle
Favorite Quotes:
"Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die." (Inigo, Princess Bride)
"What's that got to do with the price of eggs?!" (Elsie, While you were Sleeping)
"Francis, leave zem alone, zey are poo-poo heads!" (HeimlichA Bug's Life)
"Who are these children and why are they calling me 'Mom'?"
"I don't worship Satan but I kinda like the guy."
If I could be a superhero, this is the ONE power I'd have (and why I chose it): I want to be a Ctarl-Ctarl [like Aisha Clan-Clan from Outlaw Star], so I can become a white tiger when I get mad and rip my annoyances to shreds! (That is, assuming there's a moon on the planet I'm on...) [yeah right, Megan. You just want those pink leotard-clad Ctarl-Ctarl minions to yell out the last 3 words of your sentences, like a battle cry. You can't fool me!]
Nickname(s): Alf (though no one calls me this), Spaz (nobody calls me this either [I do sometimes], but it's super cool), and Andi (people used to call me this, but not anymore)
Age: 21
Favorite Color: blue, green, silver, leopard print, camo
Favorite Books: American Psycho, Glamorama, Weetzie Bat, Witch Baby and this really shibby [what's that?] book called The Cool Chicks Collection [oh, stop!]
Favorite Films: Star Wars Trilogy (not Episode 1), Raiders of the Lost Ark, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey, X Men, Velvet Goldmine, Army of Darkness, Dogma, Mystery Men, Tim Burton movies, vampire movies--especially Horror of Dracula (Michael Gough [you and your Alfred obsession...]!), cheesy/campy horror movies--Horror Hospital (Michael Gough again!)
Favorite TV Shows: Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, The Powerpuff Girls
Favorite Quotes:
"I would have knocked, but my fist had other plans." (Jack, Jack of All Trades)
"Bloody Hell!" (Spike, Buffy)
"It says I'm not really normal, but in a wonderful way." (James Marsters)
"You're a dick." (Wolverine, X Men)
"Movies are fuckin' bullshit." (Jay, Dogma)
"[brace yourselves guys... this is a LONG quote] To the pain means the first thing you lose will be your feet below the ankles, then your hands at the wrists, next your nose." "And then my tongue, I suppose. I killed you too quickly the last time, a mistake I don't mean to duplicate tonight." "I wasn't finished! The next thing you lose will be your left eye, followed by your right--" "And then my ears, I understand. Let's get on with it!" "Wrong! Your ears you keep, and I'll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out 'Dear God, what is that thing' will echo in your perfect ears. THAT is what 'to the pain' means. It means I leave you in anguish; wallowing in freakish misery, forever." (Westley [the threatener] and Prince Humperdink [the threatened], The Princess Bride)
"Was one of his directives 'hire a pansy-ass British guy'?" "My ass is not pansy!" (Gunn and Wesley, Angel)
"I may be Love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it." (Spike, Buffy)
"Snoogans." (Jay, Mallrats)
If I could be a superhero, this is the ONE power I'd have (and why I chose it): Just the one, dear? [Yay! Absolutely Fabulous! And yes, just one.] Hee hee. Ok I would want to be invisible so I could sneak into the boys' locker room. No, no. I would want to be the Spleen [from Mystery Men]. No, the Shoveler [Mystery Men again], so I could shovel well, very well. No wait, I'd be the Blue Raja [MM again] and be a limey fork-flinger [He's my favorite!]. No, no, no. The Sphynx [MM again]. Then I'd be terribly mysterious. Hold on. Let me think about this. Ok, I would want to have a healing ability, my bones laced with adamantanium (and I have no idea how to spell that monstrous word [yet you want it all through your body? Hmm...]), and super cool claws like Wolverine [well, I guess the healing mutation is the only POWER you're asking for, the the other things may be pushing it... but because I'm such a wonderful person--and because you're my best friend--AND because Wolverine claws ARE super cool--I'll let it slide. ;)]. Nobody could mess with me then, cause if they did I'd be all "snickity-snick" and pop out my claws, the middle one first, of course [naturally!]. I could take a beating and keep on ticking, and if I did get hurt, I'd heal super-quick. And I could make shish kabobs like Edward Scissorhands [well I guess we know who's on kitchen duty!].
