-Cartman has been a mayor.
-Cartman has been a leader in school debates.
-Cartman has made out with Stan's girlfriend, Wendy.
-Cartman has been the leader of the Mel Gibson fan club.
-Cartman was the first boy member of NAMBLA.
-Cartman hates hippies.
-Cartman has been a Ninja.
-Cartman has been a cop, on two different occasions.
-Cartman can sing "Kyle's Mom is a big fat bitch" in D Minor.
-Cartman has owned his own amusement park.
-Cartman had his own Christian rock band and went Murr.
-Cartman started the boy band, Fingerbang.
-Cartman won 2nd place in America's Funniest Home Videos.
-Cartman has owned two Dawnson Creek Trapper Keeper 2000's.
-Cartman chose Token as his running mate, so you know he's not a racist.
-Cartman was a priest, and ran his own church.
-Cartman has travelled to many places around the world, such as Costa Rica and Afghanistan, so you know he's cultured.
-Cartman almost built a ladder all the way up to Heaven.
-Cartman has won a bull riding contest.
-Cartman has made contact with several different races of aliens, and singlehandedly saved Earth from TV executives.
-Cartman won an essay contest.
-Cartman competed in the Special Olympics, and graciously let all the handicaps place in front of him so they wouldn't feel bad.
-Cartman has been a star athlete on South Park Elementary's football team.
-Cartman owns his own pig.
-Cartman has owned his own Shakey's Pizza Shack.
-Cartman has killled Zombies to keep you safe.
-Cartman adopted an Ethinopean boy known as Starvin Marvin.
-Cartman sang the Cheesey Poof song on National Television.
-Cartman built his own clubhouse, aka, Ewok Villiage 2000.
-Cartman campaigned to destroy the rainforest.
-Cartman played Jesus at his Church's stations of the cross.
-Cartman destroyed a Succubus.
-Cartman discovered the once thought to be extinct Jackovasaurus.
-Cartman was a Chinpokomon Master.
-Cartman lead the Confederate Army.
-Cartman owns a Kidney Blocker 2000.
-Cartman helped create a time machine.
-Cartman was on the Maury Povich show.
-Cartman was a god to a small civilization of sea people.
-Cartman discovered you could poop out of your mouth.
-Cartman singlehandedly saved old films from their director and freed Hat.
-Cartman made peace with a town split in two with insight from our fore fathers.
-Cartman saved South Park from greedy Indians.
-Cartman saved South Park from the AARP.
-Cartman saved Christmas when he saved Ike from his evil, Canadian parents.
-Cartman was a robot and was responsible for 8 Adam Sandler movies.
-Cartman made a friend in Michael Jac...Jefferson.
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