Here is the player introdcution to this event. Note the oblique reference to past KORG events in the first paragraph.

This was the first KORG event that was designed to be humorous from beginning to end. It featured a survivors and heirs to a party that had failed in their mission: to destroy the uber-golum created by the arch-lich Rosenthal. The party had successfully penetrated Rosenthal's Synagogue of Doom, only to be annhiliated by the golum itself. One party member was killed, two were polymorphed into furniture, one turned to stone, another knocked out, and the last (Sir Aisakos the Paladin) escaped by using a Wish stored on his Holy Avenger. The poorly worded Wish ("Get me as far away from this golum as you can!") hurled him 1000 years into the future. There he found the Synagogue abandoned, but his tranformed friends still around. He unpolymorphed the furniture, Stone to Fleshed the statue, and freed the captured elf (who was now 1100 years old and not wearing the years well). The party was joined by a sixth member, the descendent of the character who had been killed in the original battle (for over 40 generations his ancestors had been trying - and failing - to kill the golum). In the past 1000 years the golum had conquered much of the world, and the party would have to try to find some way to destroy him to make up for their earlier failure. If all of this doesn't seem funny, trust us - it was freaking hilarious. (To give you an idea of why, note that one of the characters was Mtonga the gorilla, an animal friend of the party ranger).

• Sir Aisakos: A Paladin and leader of the group. He had an intelligent Holy Avenger long sword which held a Wish spell. The problem was that by fleeing the original battle with the golum he had shown cowardice, and had been stripped of his powers. Thus the Holy Avenger would not work for him, and would only insult him when asked to use its powers ("Sorry, I can only cast a Holy Word for a real Paladin").
• Lerellyn: When the first battle against the golum was waged she was a young, beautiful elf. One thousand years of slavery later she's cranky, weathered, and suffering from failing eyesight (although only a couple of players did anything with the near sightedness).
• Kenichi Sato: A half-elf ranger. He was turned into a footstool by the golum, while his wife Michiko was polymorphed into a matching chair. The magic to change them back went a bit awry, however, and now Kenichi is a woman, while Michiko is a man! As something of a male cheauvenist Kenichi is not at all happy.
• Michiko Sato: The wife of Kenichi, Michiko is a human druid. Being turned into a man was quite a shock, although she has enjoyed the new take on life Kenichi is getting. Michiko and Kenichi fight a lot, due to their differences of opinion about good vs evil and such (he's good, she wants balance like all druids). Some parties played up this fighting, others did not.
• Mtonga: A gorilla that was rescued as a baby by Kenichi and Michiko. He was really smart (for a gorilla, anyway). He could only speak using words of one syllable (exception: he can say his own name). It was great fun watching players try to express themselves as Mtonga, and he was a fairly popular character.
• Thomas Agrivus XLVII: The descendant of the original Thomas who was killed by the golum. Every generation of Thomas Agrivuses has tried to kill the golum in one way or another - all have failed. This Thomas has an invention he is sure will work - the Arquebus of Armageddon. It's rather unstable, and might not fire more than one or two shots before blowing up (killing anyone near by) but Thomas is sure it will put an end to the golum's reign of terror. Thomas is somewhat dissapointed that the people he's known in legend (Sir Aisakos especially) are not quite so noble and heroic as he'd imagined.

• Rosenthal's Synagogue of Doom: At this point the parties all thought that Rosenthal was behind the golum's conquests. So they all went into his tomb to find out if there was something they could do about it. Inside they encountered Rosenthal's astral form, which threatened them with destruction by its ultimate golum. Rosenthal would then point at a curtain, clearly expecting his golum to come rampaging out. When it didn't, and the party explained that the golum had conquered half the world, Rosenthal got very angry. The golum was supposed to guard him, not run off and take over things! He advised the party that they could destroy the golum, maybe, with the Horn of Wind and Flame. This was a powerful magic item that might dry out the golum (which was made of clay) enough to make it vulnerable. Rosenthal talked in a voice like Jacky Mason (a famous Jewish comic, if you don't know who that is), and said stuff like "Oy! My golum's gone meshugina! What a shmendrick!" Hey, sometimes a Rabbi's going to go bad and turn into a lich, no?
• The City of (N)everblink: Neverblink was once a city of beholders. It had been conquered, however, by hordes of kobolds. They had discovered the arquebus, and had used it to shoot beholders out of the sky until the rest surrendered. Now the kobolds run things while beholders serve as trash collectors, chariot pullers, and so on. The beholder's only hope is their rebellion leader, Teng Fat Chow. Teng is in disguise - he wears a huge top hat (hiding most of his eyes), a monocle, and has strapped a tuxedo stuffed with straw underneath his floating body, making it look like he is, in fact, a very large man. Teng speaks with a very fake accent, claiming to be German, and asks the party to meet him in an alley. There he "reveals" that he is not actually German, but is a beholder (all the players acted very surprised, which please Teng greatly). He offes to help them find the Horn of Wind and Flame if they'll get for him Buckner's Everful Bag o' Cats. This item, if turned inside out, will release a storm of cats. Since it is well known that cats hate kobolds, the beholders hope this will eliminate them. The parties all chose to get the Bag, release the cats, and kill the kobolds. Teng then gave them the horn (which was hidden under his top hat).
• Will the Real Yeenoghu Please Rise?: The party is supposed to meet with the leader of the anti-golum revolution inside a huge arena during the big "Battle of the Elements" (featuring various elementals fighting it out). Their contact will be dressed as Yeenoghu, demon prince of gnolls. While looking for him in the crowded arena the party runs into the real Yeenoghu, who is arguing with a zombie usher because all the skyboxes are full and he's being told to sit with the stone giants. Eventually the party searched the skyboxes themselves, and finds their contact (disguised as Yeenoghu). He gives them information, and then the party moves on. (Most parties chose to alert him that the real demon prince was about, and quite angry at being bumped from his skybox). A few players chose to place bets on the elemental battles - here is the fight schedule for the arena.
• The Play: Once again KORG found an excuse to make our players perform a play. This time it came about when a huge, ancient blue dragon asked them to put on a play to amuse the people in its treasure horde. See, various people had come to live among the dragon's piles of treasure, creating a town out of the stacks of gold, silver, and copper. The dragon studied the people with the aid of a large telescope, and occasionally would put new people into the mix to see what happened. Recently he had allowed a group of minstrels into the horde, with the promise that they would put on a short play. Unfortunately the "minstrels" turned out to be a clan of ninjas, and they began assassinating people and stealing treasure instead of performing the play. The party had to agree to put on the play and kill the ninjas. Note that the play is based on their first batttle with the golum, although the facts of the play don't match up with what actually happened. This caused no small amount of consternation among the party members. Another problem with the play was that the part of M'tonga required reading, which the gorilla most surely could not do. One of the more creative players of M'tonga ate the script while a mage used Ventriliquism to speak his lines.

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