Wembley to be last ever gig?

James have refused to confirm rumours that they will play their last ever gig at Wembley Arena.  A spokesman for the band told One Fan Clapping, "We don't honestly know where James will play their final ever gig, although Wembley, as a venue, would certainly be in the running.  Although we couldn't rule out the possibility that they will end their tenure at the Manchester Evening News Arena, close to where they began.  We can confirm the possibility that Wembley will be the venue for the last ever gig THIS YEAR."  Were James to play their last ever gig we cannot confirm or deny the possibility that songs such as "Sit Down", "Come Home" and "Send In The Clowns" would be included in the setlist, although we have been told that guest appearances from Ian Curtis and Nick Drake would be unlikely.

Fans get high over James

It has been reported that at last Saturday's festival performance, at least one James fan was reportedly high - up in a tree - in order to catch the band's set.  Although we cannot confirm the story, some reports said that the fan, clearly a madman, may have been trying to scale a wall, or, he could have simply been trying to build a nest and lay eggs.  Reports that he was inspired to his antics over portents of a flood contained in the lyrics to the song "Heavens" coupled with the poor weather have been greatly exaggerated.

Bloodsucking Booth

James frontman Tim booth has failed to either confirm or deny rumours that he was turned into a vampire during his recent sojourn in the Canary Islands.  Apparently Booth claimed in a recent song to have become a vampire bat, although reports of his attacking young female fans at the band's recent shows in order to bite their necks have been denied by the band's spokesman.  If Booth were a vampire he would be unlikely to play daytime shows, would appear pale and fragile, and would probably develop a strange affinity for the music of Nick Cave.

Glennie not seen by band for days

A spokesman for the Mercury Records, home to rock band James, today suggested that bass player Jim Glennie had been unavailable for rehersals for several days now.  While the band have denied rumours that Glennie had run off with Richey Edwards, formerly of the Manic Street Preachers, to go raving in Goa, they did suggest that perhaps Glennie had gone on holiday during their time off.  They would not confirm, however, whether or not he was encamped at a nearby Butlins resort, had gone to Ibiza or perhaps was camping in the Black Forest on his time off instead.

Special thanks goes to our man on the street John Pude for helping compile these breaking news stories.