2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.

4. Be careful of men who are bald and rich; the arrogance of "rich" usually cancels out the nice of "bald"

5. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible.
In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

6. Don't try to teach men how to do anything in public.
They can learn in private; in public they have to know.

7. A good place to meet a man is at the dry cleaner.
These men usually have jobs and bathe.

8. All men hate to hear "We need to talk about our relationship."
These seven words strike fear in the heart of even General Schwarzkopf.

9. Men are brave enough to go to war, but they are not brave enough to get a bikini wax.

10. Men don't get cellulite. God might just be a man.

11. Most men hate to shop.
That's why the men's department is usually on the first floor of a department store, two inches from the door.

12. If you're dating a man who you think might be "Mr. Right," if he
a) got older,
b) got a new job, or
c) visited a psychiatrist,
you are in for a nasty surprise.
The cocoon-to-butterfly theory only works on cocoons and butterflies.

13. No man is charming all of the time.
Even Cary Grant is on record saying he wished he could be Cary Grant.

14. When four or more men get together, they talk about sports.

15. When four or more women get together, they talk about men.

16. Not one man in a beer commercial has a beer belly.

17. Men who can eat anything they want and not gain weight should do it out of sight of women.

18. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge.
If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying,
"I love you...I want to marry you...I want to have your children."

19. Men who listen to classical music tend not to spit.

20. Only men who have worn a ski suit understand how complicated it is for a woman to go to the bathroom when she's wearing a jumpsuit.

21. Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying withsuperheros.

22. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

23. When a woman tries on clothing from her closet that feels tight, she will assume she has gained weight.

24. When a man tries something from his closet that feels tight, he will assume the clothing has shrunk.

25. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause.
With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes.
Male menopause - you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

26. Men forget everything; women remember everything.

27. Men would like monogamy better if it sounded less like monotony.

28. All men would still really like to own a train set.

29. Most women are introspective: "Am I in love? Am I emotionally and creatively fulfilled?"

30.Most men are outrospective: "Did my team win? How's my car?"