Claire: "There happens to be a lot of gray between the black and white lines of your precious penal code."
Jack: "And where on this rainbow do you suggest we place Dr. Haas?"
"If a defendant's culpable act shortens a person's stay on this planet, the law will not permit him to claim that his victim would have died anyways."
"Haas tells one patient she's got a cure, it's a little white lie. She tells two patients, it's unforgivable. She tells three patients, she's a murderer. She tells four patients, she's a damn murderer, and it's ALL admissible!"
"Can we go get a drink now?" QJM
"It's a tits and ass world." QJM
"Men are pigs and we should all rot in hell. Unfortunately, that's not my jurisdiction." QJM
"Their condescension doesn't come at $75,000 a pop."
Mike: "If you know so much about police work, you can get out there and investigate this case yourself."
Jack: "Are you giving me attitude? My father was on the beat for 31 years and he wouldn't leave a D.A. with a half-baked, twisted case like this."
Claire: "He says he's concerned for her welfare."
Jack: "Like he was when he shot her."
"I know your work, Miss Kaskel. So what's it going to be, the feminist version of the devil made me do it?"
"It's revenge, dressed up in smoke and mirrors."
"This is not a Saturday morning cartoon."
"So you want to create a new category of self defense just for women?"
"This witness is qualified as an expert on the abuse of women, not on Japan-bashing."
"So first you do the crime and then you find the excuse?"
"You'd also like to pack the jury with the widows of World War II veterans."
Hellman: "Let's talk hypotheticals. A young singer gets called for an audition..."
McCoy: "And she brings her gun. What's her audition piece, '.22 Ways to Leave Your Lover'?" QJM
Hellman: "What next Jack, drag a suspect across the nearest border and beat a confession out of them?"
Jack: "Works for me."
"If you're gonna play stickball in Canarsie, learn Brooklyn rules!"
Claire: "The papers will call this a huge victory for women's rights."
Jack: "Yeah, and a giant leap for ignorance."
"Martell must be proud of his little Maggie. She just graduated from girlfriend to accomplice."
"If I was busy cleaning up after a murder I wouldn't answer the phone either."
Lawyer: "What he did he did out of fear and passion."
Jack: "And for God and country."
"Not to mention, sleeping with him is a wonderful way to say `Happy Mother's Day.'"
"She'll be out in 2003. I think the 60s should be over by then." QJM
"You did what you had to do. I did what I had to do."
"Your client is a felon Mr. Osborne, the fact that he's black is not relevant."
"The law says I don't have to give it to them Claire. Besides, I don't want to."
"You really think I would cheat to win a case?"
"Nothing in the constitution say that the state has to make the defendant's case for him."
Anita: "Tell me counselor, were you born a wiseass, or did it come with the job?"
Jack: "I'm a pussycat, you should have seen my old man."
Anita: "Your old man?"
Jack: "He was a cop, you knew that. If it would have been him who unlucky to be in front of that ATM, there would have been 2 dead kids."
Anita: "And you would have dragged him in front of a Grand Jury."
Jack: "Damn right, and I would've got an indictment too!"
Claire: "It's morally repugnant."
Jack: "It's a medical procedure. It's morally neutral."
Talbot: "You have you eye on Gracie mansion."
McCoy: "No, I don't like politics. And I don't like politicians but I won't hold that against you."
"And the $50,000 was just a Christmas bonus?"
Powell: "You people are hell-bent on destroying my client's career!"
Jack: "I think he's done that all by himself."
"I'm starting to believe that Sarah Maslin is using the DA's office as the blade in a political hatchet job."
Lawyer: "Larceny by extortion! That's when the mob says 'Pay up or I'll burn down your restaurant.'"
Jack: "'Sleep with me or I'll destroy your career.' Same thing."
Powell: "If I buy you a drink , will you promise not to charge me with assault in the morning?"
Jack: "Only if you promise not to call me a hooker."
"Give me the keys to your house or I'll charge you with murder. I'm the D.A. I can do it. Give me $10,000 or I'll tell the Feds about the shipment of heroin I saw you pick up at JFK, I'm the DA. they'll listen. Sleep with me, or I'll tell the boss you're under indictment for fraud..."
"Sarah Maslin lay down on that couch, but can any of us really say she had the choice?"
"Nothing like making new law!"
Bell: "So what are you offering?"
Jack: "A fair trial by a jury of his peers."
"It's all smoke, Sally."
"I don't have time to play games, Miss Huntley. I'll just charge you and let the chips fall where they may."
"Curran is dynamite. He was lured to Kopinsky and Tappan lit the match."
"Kopinsky needed to be disbarred, not shot in the head."
"I'm the DA. I can arrest anyone." QJM
"Curran calls Tappan. Tappan says, `He didn't double cross you, he triple crossed you. He found my money. Why don't you go see him, and tell him I said hi?'"
Bell: "Great, when does he get out of here?"
Jack: "In 8 1/3 years."
"Don't you know me by now Sally?"
Claire: "What was that all about?"
Jack: "What was what all about?"
Claire: "Don't you know me by now?"
Jack: "Oh....Sally..."
Claire: "Yeah, Sally, Miz Bell, our opposing counsel?"
Jack: "She was my assistant."
Jack: "How many people have you swindled?"
Tappan: "None."
Jack: "How many people have you been convicted of swindling?"
"Adam, you haven't been in a courtroom in a long time!"
"Heavens to Betsy, Claire, what a dreadful idea!"
Claire: "Did he pay off the ref?"
Jack: "He's the defense counsel, Claire, not the defendant."
"It's about the battle, Claire, not the prize."
"Justice is a byproduct of winning." QJM
"Think about it Mr. Furini. Dosso's got one of the best lawyers in the city and you've got Oliver Wendell Blockhead here."
Kopell: "You have my number. You could have called, Jack."
Jack: "I'm sorry, it fell out of my rolodex."
Kopell: "He's my client. I don't judge him."
Jack: "You don't have to climb into bed with him either."
"This isn't a game of chicken."
"A defendant has no statutory or constitutional right to a speedy arrest."
"You let her blow $300,000 on drugs. Which category did that fall under; her health, welfare, or education?"
"The Constitution says I can't use the evidence to convict your client. Where does it say I can't use it to prove him a liar?"
"Your justification defense just evaporated."
"Seeley is probably in there writing a new press release."
"Have you been reading God's mind?"
McCoy: "Bailiff, arrest this woman--she just confessed to murder!"
Judge: "May I remind you, Mr. McCoy, abortion is still legal in this country!"
McCoy: "Thank you your honor!" QJM
(to suspect, flanked by attorney and ex-priest): "You're getting bad advice from both Heaven and Earth." QJM
"First you conned Wall Street, now you're trying to con Court Street."
Expert witness: "That very attitude is what promotes racism in this country."
Jack: "And your testimony is the very thing that gives all the bigots in this country reason for their fear and hatred." QJM
"Maybe Corey isn't the only one who had to be handcuffed to a bed."
Adam: "Peer pressure isn't against the law."
Jack: "Rape is."
(to Cory about her new classmates): "Would you rather they hear that you were a victim that got justice, or that you were a slut?"
(referring to the points-for-sex ring): "It's the Mac Rangers' idea of intramural sports." QJM
Claire: "Greer just filed notice of appeal. All evidence relating to the Mack Rangers should have been excluded."
Jack: "Why? Because without it, Greer might have won?"
"Rule No. 1: Never drink at work. Rule No. 2: Never discuss work while drinking. Rule No. 3: When Rule No. 2 is broken, never drink alone." QJM
Claire: "You're going to wait?"
Jack: "I'll wait 'till the dinner's cleared. That's when it hit the fan at my house."
(to kid involved in a points-for-sex ring): "How many points do you think you'll be worth in prison, son?" QJM
Claire: "I'll buy the champagne."
Jack: "You'll buy the whole meal!"
Aronson: "He promised them a baby and he gave them one."
Jack: "I don't think he promised them HIS baby."
Aronson: "Considering the mother doesn't give a damn, I'd say that's pretty arrogant of you."
Jack: "Arrogant? Arrogant is trying to start your own race of people."
Gilbert: "These women come to me barren, starving for the feeling of life growing inside them. Their husbands can't give it to them. Neither can their lovers. Just me."
McCoy: "I'm sure YOUR children are not what they bargained for!"
"Jesus had his Judas, and he's no Jesus." QJM
"This isn't stink bombs in the boys room, Adam."
"You hear that, Claire? We've stumbled onto a nest of social Darwinists."
Barclay: "Even if he did make a few crank calls--"
Jack: "Crank calls? He made threats, Mr. Barclay!"
"Harrigan did it because he's a Mick? Detective Logan's a Mick. I'm a Mick. And if you don't shut up, I'll lose control and throw you out of the room!"
"Take that cap off."
Barclay: "What specifically did [Colin] tell you?"
Jack: "Everything I need to know."
McCoy: "There's no law against lying to a suspect."
Kincaid: "And you probably miss the good old days before Miranda."
Briscoe: "Hey, if anybody wants to hear some of this, I could 'accidentally' hit the intercom button."
McCoy: "That's what my old man would have done...[pointedly looking at Claire]...in the 'good old days before Miranda'." QJM
"They had a little gang at school? Find 'em and bring them in for show and tell."
"I'm Jack McCoy. I'm the assistant district attorney of New York County. You were invited here to talk to me about the murder of William Prescott. And make no mistake--you will talk to me. You're going to tell me everything you know about Colin Harrigan and Stewart Barclay's roles in that killing. If you don't...if you lie...I'll add a new word to your vocabulary - conspiracy . . . to commit murder. You could serve as many years in prison as you have candles on your birthday cake. Who wants to speak first?"
Jack: "The longer this takes, the harder these gentlemen will push."
Kid: "You don't scare me. They can't lay a finger on us."
Jack: "I don't see anyone stopping them. This isn't a rock video, son, this is reality. A man is dead and our patience is wearing thin."
(Telling him to take the kid away) "Det. Logan."
Mike: "Let's you and me have a conversation."
Jack: "I give you friend 15 minutes with Det. Logan. He will not only implicate Harrington and Barclay, but he might even point the finger at you."
"I've got you for conspiracy, and if I eat my Wheaties I can get you for second-degree murder." QJM
"Be quiet, Mr. Harrigan!"
"Ok, we've got two balls in the air and have to decide which one to catch."
"Can anyone here make a case for Palley over Chapel?" (brief pause) "Sold, bye." (walks out)
"The standard for conviction is reasonable doubt, not absolute certainty."
"I'm the first one to admit I've made a mistake."
"I suppose his prints on the headboard of the Lerner's bed got there telekinetically?"
"He was drunk. He killed two innocent people and now he's trying to use the bottle as a defense."
"Am I supposed to let him play doctor in a rubber room at Bellevue because he tells me he can't remember?"
Jack: "Only one person knows what happened, right?"
Claire: "And he was in an alcoholic fog."
Jack: "Well, let's turn on the defroster."
"If he says that E.T. told him to kill a couple of gremlins, then I'll cut a deal for insanity."
Liz: "But it's clear he knew what he was doing was wrong."
Jack: "Translation: he wasn't legally insane."
"Of the 10,000 abused children you've counseled, doctor, how many were beaten while their abusers were asleep?"
Doctor: "But abused children believe their abusers are an omnipresent threat."
Jack: "Their abusers. Not some strangers."
"Wouldn't this have been a slam dunk for the defense if Mr. Bartlett had taken the stand and confirmed her story?"
"He knew the therapy wasn't working. Instead of admitting he was wrong, he just turned up the voltage."
(Jack and Mike walk out of an interrogation room with a priest who molested Mike and his friends as a boy)
Mike: "Son of a bitch is lucky I didn't hit him."
Jack: (With a smile on his face) "So are we."
McCoy: "You're an adult. Your victims are children. There's nothing you could say to make me feel sorry for you." QJM
Elliot: "That phone call lasted ten seconds, enough time to hear the greeting and hang up."
Jack: "Or...'Denise?...Kovac. Where and when....Noonan's Bar, midnight.' Four seconds."
"She really can't complain about being a widow after murdering her husband."
"I have more than theory!"
(after the judge dismisses the charge in the murder of Daniel Johnson):
Elliot: "Now that's the post holding up the people's entire tent, Your Honor. Without that charge, the people don't have any case against my client for the Kovac killing either."
Jack: "But Ruby did kill Oswald."
Jack: "If I can't reopen, I'll put the hitman on as a rebuttal witness."
Adam: "Rebuttal to what?"
Jack: "I'll drag some statement out of Mrs. Johnson on cross-examination that he can rebut!"
(after Adam says Elliot would be insane to put Denise on the stand): "Then I'll just have to convince the defense attorney that it's in his best interest to put her on the stand!"
"We don't need your permission to present a different motive to the jury."
"So, your husband's murder was a blessing?"
Claire: "She killed two men...still believes they're the bad guys."
Jack: "They interfered with her cash flow."
Claire: "It wasn't about money."
Jack: "Maybe it wasn't her motive, but it was her cue for passion."
"That only begs the question. Who are they calling as a witness? Megan, who may be insane, or Bobby, who is a figment of her imagination ?"
"It would be like asking a jury to judge the creditability of a Martian. It's beyond their experience."
"Just because Barnett is a closet homosexual doesn't mean he can't tell time."
"Do you think that they went back just because they forgot to ask what his mother's maiden name was?"
"He'll be walking a beat on Staten Island for 2 1/2 to 5. He'll be fine."
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