by Melody Bowen
A Door Ajar...
I've been trying to do better. No -- really, really trying. There are some very specific things I'd love to have in my life, many that I'd be crazy to put in print right now, but I'm taking a different strategy than my usual take-no-prisoners-and-kick-a-little-ass approach. I'm simply asking the Big Guy to show me (and give me) what I need by "opening the doors that should be open, and closing the doors that should be closed". Now, instead of yanking on the closed doors with all the strength I can muster, I'm keeping an eye open for which ones are ajar.
I'm chose this topic tonight because I had a conversation about exactly this sort of thing last weekend. I had this conversation with someone who is also approaching life with a look-for-the-open-doors strategy [although this person has *always* been good at it... I'm learning how to do this the hard way].
I was in Kansas City with one of my favorite people on the entire planet. Someone I've known for only a few short years, but someone whom I believe knows me better than most. [He could perhaps know me better than most anyone, in fact.] Someone with whom I've shared lots of time, love, and laughter, and with whom I always feel right at home. We got together last weekend after making a mutual decision a few days ago to take Friday off from work, meet in Kansas City, and have a fabulous few days together. We hadn't seen each other for several months (much, much, much too long!), and I was excited to get to spend some quality catch-up time with him. [We've always had a fantastic time together, no matter what we were doing.]
In the midst of our fantastic weekend, we found ourselves talking about -- well, a lot of things, actually. We talked about our lives, our careers, our families. We talked about our relationships, and how difficult it can sometimes be to know when you're doing the right thing. He mentioned that he'd been praying for the right doors to be opened and the wrong ones closed, and he was really seeing results. [Results which incidentally seemed to be getting better and better.] I mentioned that I'd done a lot of soul searching lately and I'd been praying for exactly the same thing (for both of our lives, actually). As for me, I just want to know what's right, what to do, where to go... what to expect, even. I just want to do what it takes to find those things that make me happy, the things that fulfill me, and pursue them with fervor. I know that this means paying attention to the doors the Big Guy Upstairs leaves ajar for me and conscientiously choosing to walk through them instead of wasting my time yanking on the others. I really believe that's the key to finding real joy.
We talked and talked that night about so many things -- our lives, our homes, our jobs, things we hope for, things we don't -- and we encouraged each other that good doors were opening around us and that our lives were really coming together. We agreed that the right things would happen for the both of us. We agreed that the open doors we face reveal wonderful things [nothing but blue skies, calm seas, and smooth sailing ahead, actually...] We agreed on a lot of things that night, in fact. Most of all, we agreed on this: We had a positively *phenomenal* weekend, and we want to do it again. Soon.