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The elusive Gronkydoodle has been seen by numerous people. If you have a Gronkydoodle eyewitness report, e-mail it to us using the link on the left. To view official insider and government reports, click here. For pictures, click here. EYEWITNESS REPORTS Bettina, New Jersey (06/22/07) I
am a gronkydoodle otherkin, I believe. Thank the gods of gronkydoodle
that I found this website, or I wouldn't know what to do. For years,
I've felt like I wasn't human, like I didn't belong here, that I was
the soul of something else trapped in this body. Then I saw a little
family in the toilet one day. They had come to contact me briefly,
telling me that I was one of their own, and not to be afraid of the
urges I would have to drink from the toilet, or run naked through
the shrubbery. Johnny Wabidowitz, California (2/22/7) About
two years ago, I was sitting on my porch enjoying the warm evening
air. All of a sudden I was forcefully pulled from my chair and dragged
about 100 feet into a stand of trees behind my house. Standing before
me were about twenty small creatures just staring at me menacingly.
They were projecting images and messages into my mind telling me I
had to listen to Britney Spears' music and then everything went dark.
Upon awakening I had a sudden urge to get a nose job. Since then,
I have had more cosmetic surgery and I now look comepletely different.
I don't understand why I have this urge, but soon I will undergo another
surgery to to decrease the size of my nose yet again. Clint, Dallas, TX (2/21/7) I myself evoked a gronkydoodles from the world of Yetzirah. He appeared in the Triangle of Solomon and he told me that Britney Spears will shave her head. That crap came true!! Tearsa Stanley, Kingsport, TN (2/19/7) I
believe I have taken a picture of the elusive
gronkydoodle! When I first saw it I thought maybe I was hallucinating
or going crazy - but when I took a picture of it I caught it on film!
It kind of freaks me out and now I can't go to sleep unless my bathroom
door is locked at night. Larry Beavers, Abbeville, Georgia (2/18/7) There's a Gronkydoodle that lives in the koi pond in my backyard. My wife says she's seen it fly up to the bird bath. They're like gnomes with wings, and seem quite harmless. A neighbor of mine says he seen one standing on a crock's head in the swamp two years ago. It was about 2 feet high, with wings, and it was wearing a gnome hat, like them garden gnomes you see. They also have big noses. Reva Winstead, Dayton, OH (2/17/7) Thank God I found this website!!! I wish to report that I have seen Gronkydoodles and they are REAL!! It all started one night when I noticed cookies in my house kept disappearing and at first I thought it was my husband or even one of my cats but then I woke up one night to go to the bathroom and I had barely sat down on the toilet when I heard a high-pitched voice screech the words "GET OFF!!!" Well, I jumped up about having a heart attack and when I looked down I saw this little man who looked like a Keebler Elf from TV sitting in my toilet glaring up at me, clutching one of my macadamia-nut cookies in his hand. I was scared! I proceeded to try and flush him down the toilet and when I reached down he jumped out and ran off through the door and down the hallway...I ran after it and couldn't find it! Now I'm scared to use that bathroom and I leave cookies beside the toilet because I don't want to make this thing mad!! My husband thinks I'm crazy but I know the truth - GRONKYDOODLES ARE REAL!! Here is a picture. Thank you!! Elizabeth P., Chicago, IL. (2/16/7) I remember one night in particular that I was going to the john. I was half asleep. I sat down on the toilet and felt something tickeling my ass. I have never jumped so high in my life! When I turned around to look, something lifted its head out of the toilet and said, in a scratchy voice, "Why don't you love me?" I can't really describe what it looked like. It was dark. It reminded me of the Travelocity Gnome and a leprechaun. Can you send investigators to my house? Bob Starling, Detroit, Michigan (2/16/7) I have had the soul of a Gronkydoodle living inside my ass for about five years now. Sometimes it makes me do things I don't want to do, like pick my butt in public, or scurry under shrubbery. It really creeps me out sometimes. When I go to the bathroom I sometimes feel like I'm at a family reunion. I think his family lives in the toilet. Thank you for not laughing at me like the rest of my family does. This is a very embarassing and confusing situation for me.
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Gronkydoodles, hear my cry! Without your love my soul shall die! -Al Manning | |
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