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nsw:
WELCOME TO MOUNT CRUSH-MORE!
(The scene opens up at the site of Mount Rushmore in South Dakota. The camera
pauses on the faces of the presidents, before slowly panning down to reveal Scott "The Boy"
Hellings. He is wearing a black UBERstar t-shirt and jeans, with one of his red and white ribbons pinned onto his shirt. His newly
acquired United States Championship is wrapped around his waist. It is obviously early in the morning, and
there are very few tourists at the site. Those who are there seem content to ignore The Boy and happily snap
photos of the monument.)
HELLINGS-
"Well here I am, standing before what is perhaps the one image that best depicts anything and everything that America
stands for. I knew I had to come here too, because now that I am United States Champion, I felt I needed
to do some homework on the good U. S. of A. I do it so that I can become an even greater
spokesperson for the country. Look at them, they're majestic aren't they? You know
I can't help but feel that even though I am Canadian-heck I'm originally known as The Canadian Legend-it seems to me as though
I share something with those four faces up there. Oh, I could say something lame and say we all share something with them, such as (making quotation
marks with his fingers) 'life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness and the American Dream.' But that junk doesn't really
apply to me, since I'm not actually American. So forget all that goobledy gook
because that's stuff not meant for me. That sort of thing is meant for the common man. It is a motto that guys like John Murphy
look up to. Am I a Working Class Hero? Hardly! Look at me! I'm a champion dammit! I am the one and only UBERstar! And, let's face facts, since winning that title
I have become even more famous and popular than ever before. There is no doubt in my mind that I have become the M.I.P.-the MOST Important Person. So while that American Dream
stuff might sound good to Joe Blow the American Worker, or it might prove an effective way to entice immigrants to come to this land, it just doesn't work on me. I'm simply above all that.
Nope, I connect on a much deeper level."
(The Boy points to Washington)
HELLINGS-
"George Washington was attributed
with not being able to tell a lie. Me? Well I generally speak the truth.
Don't believe me? I said that I would win at Overdrive and become the United States Champion and I did just that. That's a cold, hard fact that you simply
cannot argue. Did I lie about it? Did I make a false statement? Nope. The simple fact remains is that I am every bit as good as I say I am and I proved that
to everyone last week! Let me tell you, if you wanna hear a lie, just listen to Darius Malcolm talk about how popular he is. But if you want the truth than look no further than the gold I'm wearing.
But perhaps more significantly than truth or lies is the fact that Washington was the first president. Me? Well I was the first United States Champion. It may not hold the same level of power or prestige, but
at least we are both trailblazers in what we do. And no matter what no one can take that away from us. I could lose the title tomorrow-and that simply won't happen-but IF I did, you would never
be able to rewrite the history books because we all know I was the first person to ever win that title, just like everyone knows George Washington was the first president."
(The Boy points to Jefferson)
HELLINGS-
"And hey, what about Thomas Jefferson? Big Tom, he was a great guy. He oversaw the Louisiana
Purchase and he set Lewis and Clark out there to explore the country's terrain, peoples, flora and fauna. He was a man all about
expanding American horizons. Well since winning the U.S. Title, I have begun to expand my own personal horizons. I used to be known only as The Canadian
Legend, but since winning at Overdrive, the demand for such an icon as myself has skyrocketed. What can I say? I just keep attracting more and more fans, more Boy Scouts. As such, I have expanded my Legend Status to
become the official North American Legend. So you see? Just as Jefferson decided not to settle for what he had, I too went out there and sought even more fame and more recognition. Sure, you might think
it would be stressful being such a hero, such a positive role model for so many people, but I know I can handle it. Why? Because I want to, because I CAN!"
HELLINGS-
"But it's more than that. As a collective unit, the presidents all sit on top of the mountain, looking
down on everyone else. And, well, I'm in the same boat. As of this moment I am the only champion
in No Surrender Wrestling. That's it, there's just me. If you people don't like me-and I don't know why you
wouldn't at least admire someone who is honest-it doesn't really matter because you have no other choice. I am the only one with a title right now, I am the lone ambassador for this company. There's no World Champion, there is no X Champion, no
Tag Champions. Nope, there's just me. What I am getting at is that I am the lone person sitting atop the NSW mountain, looking down at everyone else, where they all belong-beneath me.
And I've been looking down on the world below me and I have to admit I am not impressed at all. Who is honestly going to beat me for this championship? Who can come in here
and take this away from me? 'Cause the only way I'm losing this title is when I get bored with it. Or if, for some strange reason, I actually do get beat it won't really matter much anyway because that my friends
is the first sign of Judgment Day. As soon as that referee counts to three the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse will come ridin' in to announce the winner of the match, followed
by the end of all mankind. Seriously, think about it. Darius Malcolm? Jason Collins? This is the big time, you don't send an amateur to do a professional's job. You don't send in
the intern to do the triple bypass operation, you let the surgeon handle it. Well consider me the doctor and I'm here to cure all that ails you. I'm here to ensure that there is someone
worthy of the fan's hard-earned money. Without me you people would be forced to cheer for someone like a Sarah Frost or a David Black. I know some people like to boo me just because I say what is on my mind and because it
is true when I say that I am The Boy and that means I am The Best! But you have to admit, if it weren't for me, all you fans would be left with nothing but all these other sub-par wrestlers.
The fact is you people need me. You need me to show you what greatness looks like. Heck, No Surrender Wrestling needs me. I am not known as The Nielsen's Favourite Son for nothing you know. A great journey begins with a single step, just as Rome, or more appropriately this monument, was
not built in a day. And a new, upstart wrestling promotion does not become an instant success overnight either. But at least the groundwork has been laid, the foundation is there and the man leading the charge is me. I've been saying it for weeks now, but maybe you people will start to realize that I am
the marquee player, the franchise saviour, and the number one money maker! Just as this monument can serve as a source of inspiration, all of you NSW viewers can take solace in knowing that I am here. So when you're watching another run of the mill, bathroom break kind of match featuring
some monkey the suits hired, at least you can take comfort in knowing that I am here to ensure that you will always walk away entertained as long as I am on the job."
(The Boy turns to leave but then turns around and faces the camera one more time.)
HELLINGS-
"You may not like me, but right now I'm all you have. And no matter how many others try to climb up to try and take this (he slaps the title around his waist for emphasis) away from me, I will always knock them back down and remain on top of the mountain, MY mountain!
You think you might be able to beat me, but I'm gonna break it to you-no one around here is good enough. I don't mean to be so harsh, but I am forced to be a Dream Crusher. We don't need people running around who are high on expectations for themselves, but low on talent! Someone has to come in and be the reality check! So ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Mount Crush-More because by the time I'm done here they'll be carving my face into stone too. I know it, you know it, the whole damn world knows it!"
(The Boy walks away as the camera pans over and zooms in slightly on the faces of the presidents, pausing momentarily, before finally fading to black.)
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