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Is Hell Exothermic or Endothermic?
The following is an actual question given on University of
Washington
chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound"
that the
professor shared it.
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic
(absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's
Law,
(gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is
compressed) or
some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to
know how
the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the
rate that
souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I
think that
we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not
leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are
entering
Hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the
world
today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a
member of
their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than
one of
these religions and since people do not belong to more than one
religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth
and
death rates as they are we can expect the number of souls in
Hell to
increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of
the volume
in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the
temperature and
pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to
expand
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two
possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
souls
enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will
increase
until all Hell breaks loose.
2. Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
increase of
souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until
Hell
freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given
to me by
Ms. Teresa Banyan during my freshman year, "...that it will be a
cold
day in Hell before I sleep with you." And take into account the
fact
that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with
her,
then, #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is
exothermic and
will not freeze.
The student received the only "A"
I (Taylor McNamara) DID NOT WRITE THIS!!!
this was taken from a Fact of the Day newsletter from http://www.twistedhumor.com
to subscribe to the Fact of the Day newsletter, click here or here: http://www.twistedhumor.com/newsletters.shtml
Note: the Twisted Humor website has rated R jokes on it and (in my opinion) is not suitable for children.
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Life on Other Planets
Aliens exist. There is life out there. It�s only realistic to expect that there is intelligent life on planets other than earth. There are a number of planets in each solar system, numerous solar systems in each galaxy, billions of galaxies in the universe. It�s actually quite arrogant and egotistical to think that we are the only intelligent life forms in the entire universe. This belief almost takes us back hundreds of years when people thought the sun and the other planets revolved around the earth and that the earth was flat. It�s only logical to think that there is life on planets other than earth. The truth is, we don�t know what kind of life is out there, but with all the planets in the universe, we do *know* that there has to be life out there.
--by Taylor McNamara*
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Why the Mouse Ran up the Clock
�Hickory dickory dock,
the mouse ran up the clock,
the clock struck one,
the mouse ran down,
hickory dickory dock.�
--author unknown, possibly Mother Goose
I suppose you�ve all wondered why the mouse ran up the clock. Well, the mouse�s older brother bet him $10 that he couldn�t stay at the top of the clock until one �o clock. One must remember that $10 is a ton of money to a mouse. The mouse stayed at the top of the clock for an entire hour and was very happy when the clock finally struck one. The top of a clock isn�t s comfy as one would think. He proved his brother wrong, won the $10 and bought himself cheese wheel.
--by Taylor McNamara*
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*screen name, I would never give you my real name
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