Your fortieth

vomit of the day was pale

clear yellowy green, and smelled warm and sweet.  You lay

in your oily sweat and soiled

sheets, and wouldn't bear

to be changed.

A priest

came to ask you

           how you felt.

Fine.

                                                 

No good news

came.  Time

dissolved our fearlessness

away.  Mercy

of death or madness did

not come.  I record

this:  fear

and fearlessness were the same.




Poem of the mother whose young son has cancer



It's a strong box

this dread is locked in,

but every hand brushes unseen latches

to secret openings, each

large enough to show me dread's size

and its restless motion.

Eyes are quick:  no denying

this dread is bigger than my heart,

stronger than my right arm.


A woman I know believed, when she flew

to her child's dead side, her touch would

raise him.  What saves

my son won't be so easy

to find, so I'm --

oh, dashing, rummaging;

I'm praying, sweating; holding

this dread locked in

silence; crying

loud in the shower; I tire

some days and quiet down, and eyes around say

after the shrieks and the hot

staggering after firefly hope:

       how well she looks at rest in that cool

       bed, despair.


  * * *

bright knot in the stream

of fire, occasion for

intricate knowing, I brought

out of the cave and safe to now

this bony scaffold for your growth,

trellis for your exploring.

I wove from meat and air

tendrils along it, instruments

for our counterpoint.  Out of expendable

      seed and blood I made

out of my bones I fed

       you for my rare play,

                my costly

                delight.


who wove the beast in?

I look long at the luminous skin

that keeps the cosmos out, you in.

Reading its shifting codes in dwindling lines

I see your fear and shame

illuminate mine.


                                                  Continue   In Love With the Angel

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