Tatoo
    Jude : Dad, nagpa-tattoo ako!
    Erap : Aba, tama ‘yan! Labanan natin ang tsismis na bading ka anak!
    Erap : Patingin nga ng tattoo mo?
    Jude : O, di ba Dad, maganda na ang kilay ko?

by: Shokla

While in the Malacanang Clinic
    Erap : It's been a month since my last visit and I still feel miserable.
    Doc : Did you follow my instructions?
    Erap : Yes Doc, sabi sa bote ng drug "KEEP TIGHTLY CLOSED"!

by: Drug Addict

Itlog
   PDI Reporter : Mr. President, bakit po paika-ika kayong maglakad?
   Erap : I have high cholesterol level. Sabi ng doktor ko, IWASAN KO               DAW YUNG ITLOG!

by: Eggplant

Watering the Plants
    Erap : I thought I told you to water the plants?
    Hardinero : Yes, you did sir, but it is raining hard right now, sir.
    Erap (MAD) : That's no excuse, I know we supplied you with raincoats!

by: The Gardener

Erap's Exam
  Question: Why does Erap take off his clothes whenever he takes exams?
  Answer: Coz the test questions says "ANSWER IN BRIEF"!!!

by: Intelligent Guess

Erap's Speech
    Erap to everyone: Huwag ninyo akong subukan!!!
    Erap to criminals: Huwag ninyo akong subukan!!!
    Erap to politician: Huwag ninyo akong subukan!!!
    Erap to Monica Lewinski: Ako naman subukan mo!!!

by: Orator

General Check-Up
    Doc: Lola, kelan ho ba kayo huling nakipagtalik?
    Lola: Mga 1955
    Doc: Matagal na ho pala ano po?
    Lola: Di naman, 20:55 pa lang eh!

by: OB-Gyne

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