Episodes 10.2-12.1
Izzy: It's supposed to help us find our way, you idiot!
Montblanc: Sheesh...
Izzy: Must... resist... urge to stab Montblanc to death.
Montblanc: Off we go!
[10 seconds later...]
Izzy: Great. We took ten steps and ended up in a batch of quicksand.
Montblanc: See? This is why we came down this road!
Izzy: Um.... the point was to commit suicide ten minutes into the adventure?
Montblanc: No, no. You see, when we're about to die, the director will yell "cut", we'll step out, and get some coffee... I like mine with extra sugar.
Izzy: Killing you will be the greatest moment of my life.
Montblanc: Yeah... same here.
Izzy: [pulls out a knife] Then you won't mind taking a permanent "coffee break" right now?
Montblanc: Not at all. Because when you try to stab me to death, I won't really die. The director will just yell "cut", and my stunt double will perish in my stead.
Izzy: Why me?!?!?!?!
Elder: Then you will fail...fail...fail...[echo continues]...you will know when to open this.
Izzy: Crap! I can't kill this...this...thingy or I'll fail my quest! Crap! Well I guess this is as good a time as any to open the package the elder gave me.
[Izzy opens the package to reveal.............. a really old sword that's rusty and broken in two!]
Izzy: WHAT?! This is a whole lot of crap! That old geezer gave me a rusted, broken sword! Well, I guess it'll have to do...
[Izzy tries to use the hilt half to reach a vine near the edge of the pit (there is always one of these nearby) When suddenly Monty flies overhead and grabs the vine, pulling it out of Izzy's reach.]
Izzy: Huh? You can fly? Why didn't you do that in the first place?!
Montblanc: I forgot... now I remember! Nah nah na boo boo! You can't catch me!
[Monty zooms around Izzy's head madly with the vine trailing behind him like a banner]
Izzy: Montblanc!!! Ahem...please...get...me...out...of...this...pit!
[Izzy strained not to yell at the stupid moogle.]
Montblanc: Oh, forgot about that, here ya go!
[Tosses down the vine and drags a screaming Izzy to safety]
Montblanc: There, you're out! Come on! This is no time to be laying around! Let's go!
Izzy: We'll see if that stunt double saves your butt the next time I forget to get you out of a pit...
Izzy: Well that nearly ended in disaster.
Montblanc: So much for my coffee.... err... I mean, yeah! That was close! But I totally saved the day!
Izzy: I am still in disbelief that he saved the day... um... I mean, yeah, that was great.
Montblanc: So, what're you gonna do with that busted sword?
Izzy: Cut you with the rusty, broken, pointy end...... I'll probably sell it in the pawn shop in the next town.
Montblanc: Oh. Ok.
Izzy: Why? Did you have any better ideas?
Montblanc: Surprisingly, yes.
Izzy: Shoot.