Mission and Philosophy

Historically, when society is presented nudity, virtually all movies, television programs, strip clubs and adult magazines are more focused upon exposing and objectifying the nude female. In no small measure this is due to men being in control of the media and commercial enterprise for sex, and, men are usually more visually oriented than women. From an early age, society teaches women that it is inappropriate for them to pursue the same visual experiences men have enjoyed over the centuries.

The mission of our parties is to reverse this stereotype and turn the tables, while also creating a fun social gathering.  Our parties are organized and hosted by women with the women's interest always considered first.  Thus, The theme of the party, the agenda and all aspects including rules and protocol are controlled by women, not men.  This assures that the event is first and foremost to provide a pleasing, comfortable and fun experience for all women coming.   Our parties require all men coming to be respectful, polite and to cater to the needs of the women when requested.  And no unwanted advances of the men are accepted.

The differentiating characteristic of CFNM parties is the dress.  Women always remain fully clothed; however, it is mandatory for all men to remain nude throughout the entire event.   The male nudity requirement is not for sex, but instead to provide women the opportunity to experience the visual sensations of seeing the men present nude. Our CFNM parties give the women in attendance a feeling of empowerment and entitlement unlike any other parties they have ever experienced.   All coming, both males and females, accept, embrace and enjoy this unique aspect of our parties.

Frequently Asked Questions

• Q: I have never heard of this type of party. Where and when did they begin?
  

  A: The concept of CFNM gatherings can be documented as far back as ancient Greece where men competed at the Olympics completely naked as well as all other athletic events. Not only were women spectators at certain events (only unmarried females were allowed to watch the Olympics), but women also competed in athletic competitions although they were always clothed despite all male athletes being nude.

  But the first party we know of that was dedicated to a clothed-female/naked-male theme was the original Naked Slaveboy Tea Party hosted by four women well known amongst the literary circles in San Francisco in 1991. This party was hosted completely by women and done with class. The event was a female-only party (guest list that is) whereby women wore comely evening attire and gathered to partake in reading of literary works, drinks, and food. However, the party servers, waiters and butlers were exclusively men with all males present required to wear a tuxedo bowtie, gloves, polished black leather shoes and black socks, but nothing else. Because this was a social gathering where the men were volunteers, it was truly a party with a strong CFNM focus. The details of this party, and discussions of it by the women that organized it can be found on the link "Tea Parties" on the right side of this page (follow the "links" section on that site).

  Because of the absolute success of this and other similar parties, CFNM parties have become more popular taking on different themes and atmospheres. The central theme, however, is that they are not gatherings for the purpose of sexual encounters, and, the women are always clothed whereas the men are always nude.
  
  

• Q: Is this a profit enterprise?
  

  A: No. Our parties are non-profit and only members are invited.  Donations may be asked solely to cover expenses.
  
  

• Q: OK, interested, but tell me, what is it like? Is it just a bunch of horny naked guys?
  

  A: No.  First, the majority at the party have historically been women, and a good portion of these parties is no different than any other cocktail gathering or social event. People talk about their jobs, fashion, hobbies, what they do and where they have traveled. Pleasant friendly conversation is common. Since the guys are at the disadvantage (exposed and vulnerable) some may even be a bit shy. With that said, a goal of many of the women is to tease the guys into an aroused state, and some are quite good at it!  Thus, there might be "horny naked guys" at the party; however, no sex is allowed.  Of course, guys and gals do meet and leave the party together, but we never asked them to kiss and tell.
  
  

• Q: Will there be open sex between participants?
  

  A: No. These are not a "swingers" or sex party, and we never have an agenda for open sexual activity. Women are not supposed to remove any clothes, and we plan for all women to be comfortable and happy. Many coming have never been at a party with such an edge, and will be a bit nervous being their first time not knowing what to expect, so it is best to first talk with the hostesses and find out what the ambience is for what they are planning.
  
  

• Q: How do you determine what men are invited?
  

  A: Even though all men know in advance there will be no sexual playing between participants and that they will not have the opportunity to see any female nudity whatsoever, men still line up in throngs volunteering to come to our events.  This waiting list allows us to be highly selective as to who comes.  First and foremost, all men must display a highly respectful and pleasant attitude without voicing demands or conditions upon their coming. Men attempting to have the party organized as they want it will automatically be excluded from coming - all men must accept the fact that it is the women, not the men, that make the rules and set the tone, and all men must abide by those rules. Men should have good physiques and take care of themself and be well groomed. Men should be easy on the eyes (advice - If your a couch potato, hit the gym before applying).   Men coming are usually in their 20s, 30s and 40s.
  
  

• Q: How do you determine what women are invited?
  

  A:  Many parties have a capacity limit on how many can attend, so women are admitted on a first-come basis.  All women must be at least 18 years or older, and at least 21 years if they bring alcohol (no alcohol is served).  
  
  

• Q: How many party guests come, and what is the typical female-to-male ratio?
  

  A: Each party is different. The amount of guests coming depends on the goal of the party planners and the size of venue. Our past events have seen around 40 to 60 guests, which we feel is the right size such that it is small enough to avoid the challenges of a large crowd, but large enough to provide a good variety of guests you can meet.

  We have learned that a CFNM party with more women than men allows first-time female guests to feel more at ease. We thus shoot for a female-to-male ratio of about 60%. Unfortunately, there are typically more men than women that seek an invitation; thus, it creates a waiting list for men with the hostesses making the final selection determination. This is why if you are male and want to come, it is important you comply with all of the application requests asked of you and to show interest, enthusiasm, respect and willingness to help with the event, provide service and cater to the needs and wants of the ladies coming. If you do this, you'll have a much better chance of being invited than the average guy applying.
  
  

• Q: I'm female, and am not a "Barbie" type.  Will I be in the minority?
  

  A:  Absolutely not!  Our goal is to make CFNM parties an available opportunity for all women, and women that have come in the past represent a cross section of the female population. We would love to see CFNM parties become common events attracting the majority of women, including your average girl-next-door types. Women coming have been as young as 18 and as old as in their 60s.  True, you will see the slender, attractive Barbies at our parties too, but they are not exclusively targeted for invitation. We do not make determination of what women come upon their looks and physique.  Women can dress attractively wearing however much clothes make them feel comfortable including full length dresses or sweat shirts.
  
  

• Q: I'm just a woman that enjoys a little voyeurism, and I love the "Haha - I can see you but you can't see me" quality of this party (finally, turn about's fair play!), but have no desire to pick up a guy or have a sexual encounter. Is this for me?
  

  A: Definitely. First and foremost, our parties are primarily designed to allow women the enjoyment of viewing all men attending in the nude while knowing neither they nor any other woman will ever undress or have any pressure from an unspoken sexual agenda - more than anything else, this is what a CFNM Party is about. Some women that attend simply like the visual sensations of the environment while others enjoy being more empowered in a social setting - that is, they like the idea of the men being at a disadvantage being vulnerably exposed while the women are not. And there are even others that enjoy having the men catering to the women, who are in control. Parties can cater to all of these themes.

  But the most important agenda is for all ladies to feel comfortable and have a good time while getting to know each other. And if post-party friendships or relationships develop, then the parties are definitely worth while!
  
  

• Q: I'm male, and feel the policies whereby it is mandatory for only the men to be nude is unfair! Why not make it nude for both?
  

  A: You are absolutely correct...it is unfair. But it is this very inequity created while putting the women in an elevated position that make our parties so unique.  We not only acknowledge this, but celebrate and embrace this dynamic. The unspoken power and control element when a nude person is fully exposed to a clothed person of the opposite sex is an integral part of the erotica surrounding our parties.  And no, it will not change.  If this bothers you, then we invite you to explore the thousands of other parties that men have historically enjoyed wherein there is nudity and sexual activity amongst all their participants. But please don't apply to come to one of ours expecting to experience something we are not as we have a waiting list of men who will happily accept the conditions and terms of our parties.
  
  

• Q: I'm a male, and would enjoy wearing a sexy g-string with a leather pouch for my equipment. It is very revealing. Would wearing this be acceptable?
  

  A: We are often asked by men if their wearing a g-string, jock strap or bikini briefs could substitute for full nudity. First, ladies often do enjoy a bit of a fashion show. One event began with the striptease of men down to athletic jock straps and the like, then the men modeled their skimpy briefs for the ladies. There are also women that enjoy a fashion show of men's fetish attire such as cock rings, black leather cock pouches and and g-strings, chastity belts and the like. Such parading of the men donned in such attire could be a fun and enjoyable viewing opportunity for the ladies and very appropriate for CFNM parties.

  However, if and when this type of thing occurs at a CFNM party, it is just a fun diversion and temporary. After the ladies have enjoyed their viewing of the display, all men are then required to remove any g-strings, undies or jock straps leaving them, yes, completely naked. And they must remain naked throughout the remainder of the party.
  
  

• Q: What is the process whereby men are required to get undressed.
  

  A: We have seen it take many forms. Originally, some were in the flavor of the "Full Monty Parties" where the men strip to music, then once nude their clothes are gathered. Others have allowed a period of clothed social interaction whereby a bell is rung announcing it is time for the men to remove their clothes. One event had each man standing in front of the ladies and one-by-one doing a striptease for them. All can be considered and have their benefits.

  However, these type of formats sometimes create a coordination problem for the hostesses. Men sometimes do not comply with the rules and must be pestered to take their clothes off. This upsets the harmony and ambiance, and, makes it awkward for those men that do follow the rules. Because there are a number of other activities that also require coordination work, we have devised a very simple way of dealing with this. Upon arrival, all guests must register at a reception table where they are greeted by some of the female volunteer hostesses at the table. Their names are checked off a list, they are given the rules they must read and sign, and IDs are checked to assure no minors are admitted. Then, while at the reception table all men are instructed to immediately strip completely nude while in front of the hostesses. Once nude, their clothes and belongings are gathered and put into a numbered brown paper bag and stapled with their names written on the bags. The bags are then placed in a secured place and the men may only access these bags upon their leaving the party. This assures that all men remain totally naked throughout the event from the moment they arrive until they leave, which is both proper and how a CFNM party should be.
  
  

• Q: I have a small penis and am not sure the women would want a guy of my size coming.   Is this party for me?
  

  A:  We do not select men based upon their penis sizes.  Women are more concerned about what's attached to your penis and what lies between your ears.   A man with a small cock but wonderful attitude will typically win out over an overly endowed guy with an arrogant and presumptuous attitude. Also, many women come to enjoy viewing the array and differences in the attributes of the men, including the sizes and shapes of their penises and balls. These women quickly learn that the old adage "seen one, seen em' all" is not true! The women coming should rest assured that they will have quite a sampling of men and what they have to offer.
  
  

• Q: You indicate men must take care of themselves and be well groomed. What does this include?
  

  A:  It should go without saying that the men should be clean and show the utmost care in hygiene. Scraggly beards and unkempt hair are big turn offs, so please see the barber first. As it pertains to the genital area, our polls show that virtually all women want the pubic hair trimmed, if not completely removed. Hair obscurring the genitals should be removed such that they may be fully viewed by the ladies. Remember, keeping yourself well groomed and neatly trimmed down there shows respect for the ladies by demonstrating to them that you want their viewing experience of your cock and balls to be as pleasant for them as as possible.
  
  

• Q: How much of this is about female domination and female supremacy?
  

  A: CFNM parties come in many varieties including some that involve a bit female domination. Our variety of CFNM parties are not of that flavor. Of course, the empowerment of women and the elevation of their stature is embodied in the theme of our events, and men must display courtesy and appreciation of the women for no reason more than they are simply the fairer gender. Some (but not all) of our events include nude butlers and nude male waiters required to cater to the needs and requests of the ladies, or nude masseurs to pamper the women. But our our events are not about humiliation, slavery, punishment or for men desiring to be treated like "sissies".  Please go to our Group Page for links where you can find those types of CFNM parties if you are interested.
  
  

• Q: Are there planned activites? Are there any games or contests?
  

  A: Parties vary in this regards. Some are no different than your typical happy hour social gathering, with the only exception being that the men are nude. Hors d'oeuvres, food, drink (byob) and music are almost always offered, and most parties include socializing to allow participants to get to know each other.

  Over the years, our female guests have offered many ideas about how to break the ice and to provide our ladies fun and entertainment. These activities have grown to some pretty unusual and fun concepts. Women have suggested the following activities: best buns, best chest and biggest balls contests, a ring toss contest, "Guess who's attached to that?" and a "Minute Man" contest in which the guys are teased by female contestants and the girl that gets the first guy to "rise to the occasion at full attention" wins.

  The key, however, is to assure all activities fall within the realm of comfort and acceptability for our female guests, and we want to avoid activities that are too "edgy" involving sexual contact that might offend some. We thus put emphasis on a lot of dialogue between our hostesses and participants, both male and female, prior to the parties to ascertain what activities would be fun, and which might be too edgy.

  We are constantly searching for new and creative ideas for party activities and love to get them emailed to us by both our female and male guests. .

  To assist the planners and hostesses, we have collected a number of creative ideas specifically for you, and present them here:

  CFNM Party Games!!!
  
  

  One thing we absolutely recommend is that all male guests learn various techniques for foot and other types of massages (don't assume you know how if you've never done it!). We therefore have created a page of useful information and techniques you should learn in adance:

  CFNM Massage Techniques
  
  
  
  
• Q: Can I bring some of my girlfriends?
  

  A: Definitely - we encourage you to bring your girlfriends! This will make you feel more comfortable having friends present, and, will give them an opportunity to experience something quite different as well!
  
  

• Q: What do the women wear?  Although it is not required for girls to undress, is female nudity permissible?
  

  A: CFNM parties vary and some "Tea Parties" actually require formal, elegant dress of the women while the men wear bowties, gloves and polished shoes (but nothing else).   Sometimes, dressing sexy is encouraged, although casual and comfortable dress is the norm.  You will need to dress comfortably if the event is held outdoors, which may mean a sun dress, pants or even a swim suit if there is a pool or hot tub. Some parties may have a theme where the women are to dress sexy, maybe even don lingerie; however, this is a variation off the standard theme, which is that women dress in a normal way they would at a similar non-sexual event that would not have nude men. We recommend chatting with the hostesses in advance, as they can advise you if such a theme is planned.

  Protocol requires all women to remain fully clothed at all times, and even going topless is usually a violation of the rules established for your party. This rule is for four important reasons.

  First, if women also get nude, it will change the atmosphere potentially provoking sexual play between participants, which is contrary to the intent of the party.

  Second, many women come with the understanding they will not be required to undress. If some of the women are getting nude, those who do not may feel awkward. These women have asked us to assure other women will remain clothed.

  Third, couples often come and some wives have indicated they would feel uneasy watching their nude husbands mingle with other nude women while they themselves are not (again, our parties are designed for the woman's interests over the man's).

  And fourth, we want to preserve a very unique dynamic, that is all women are clothed whereas all men are nude.  This is an integral theme to all of our parties and the contrast is something that creates a fun and enjoyable dynamic that is uniquely different.
  
  

• Q: Is this legal?
  

  A: This is a private, non-commercial party on private property. Venues are usually secluded such that the party cannot be seen from off-site by non-attendees. Consequently, we believe it is a non-issue and there will be no problems.
  
  

• Q:  Will I be safe and not hassled by the guys?
  

  A:  Females that have attended these parties attest that the guys are almost always friendly and courteous.  In fact, the challenge is that some guys will feel awkward and shy being naked and surrounded by women, as the women often outnumber the men. Our goal is to assure that the guys are all nice and understand the theme. All males will be instructed to treat all women like princesses, to get them drinks if requested, and to be polite.  And anyone at the party that feels the least bit uncomfortable may leave at anytime. We will also have designated males to act as bouncers for unwanted guests. Our goal is to make sure the ladies feel safe and secure while having a good time.  
  
  

• Q: Can I bring my boyfriend/husband/male roommate?
  

  A: Yes, but he must read this web site, adhere to all of the rules, and, must also remain nude for the entire party.  ALL males, even if they are providing a service such as tending bar, photographers or the like must also be completely nude at all times that they are at the party.
  
  

• Q: Can I bring a camera and photograph the participants?
  

  A:  We have a policy that all attending must respect and keep private the identity of all others attending. At no time is anyone permitted to photograph anyone else without their permission. Some of our female attendees want photographs to keep as momentos, and, some have no concern over having their photos taken. We therefore provide secluded areas wherein photographs can be taken of consenting participants, and also provide theatrical masks to conceal their identity should they desire it.

  So yes, bring your camera. The level of photography allowed will be addressed prior to the event.
  
  

• Q: I'm a recovering prick teaser and admit that I love flirting with and sexually taunting guys, but often don't have any intention of anything else. How do you feel about a prick tease like me?
  

  A: Our parties naturally allow for a high level of flirtation. Women enjoy practicing their prick teasing techniques on the men, particularly given that, because all men are nude, the ladies have a rare opportunity to instantly see the men�s physical responses to their teasing. This is why prick teasing is not only not discouraged, but instead encouraged and even sometimes integrated into our activities and games with women getting awards for being the best at it. All men coming should know that it is common at our parties for a woman to intentionally prick tease a man solely to see his transformation from a flaccid to an erect state with her knowing that she was the one that caused it - but should also know that she may have no other reason for teasing him than to see that happen, and no desire to take it further. In such cases, men should regard her attention in him as a compliment, and his revealing his erection to her thus demonstrating how aroused her flirtation has made him is a good way of his returning the compliment to her without any expectation for anything more. Regardless of the level of her flirtation, at no time may any male have any contact with any female, including touching, hugging or kissing her, without her clearly granting him permission to do so.
  
  

• Q: Will the guys be getting erections?
  

  A: With the amount of flirtation that occurs (see above) it is a natural, inevitable reaction that the guys become erect.  Unlike typical nudist events, our parties provide an environment where the men should feel comfortable being fully aroused at any time - it shows the rest of the participants that they are indeed enjoying the party! One female guest have been surveyed and the vast majority indicated they enjoy seeing erections on the men. Men should know in advance of coming they can expect to be in the presence of numerous other nude men with erections, and if they are uncomfortable with that environment, should reconsider attending.
  
  

• Q:  Will the men ever touch themselves in a self-erotic way?

• A: After numerous polls and surveys taken over the past several years involving hundreds of women interested in attending CFNM events, it has become clear that when instructed to do so by the ladies, the majority would indeed enjoy seeing the men openly self pleasure themselves for them to watch. As previously stated, our female guests are the ultimate deciders on the acceptability of any activity, and have voiced their collective opinion on this matter. Therefore, women having the men openly masturbate in the main party area for all female guests to view is not considered a "prohibited sexual activity" between guests, but instead an acceptable activity at all of our parties. The extent of such an activity can vary from just one or two men doing it discreetly with a one or a few women watching to an open activity such as a "masturbation contest" with all men attending participating and all women attending watching. Such activities, however, will depend upon the level of interest those women coming to any specific event and should be discussed in advanced so that anyone coming will know what to expect. Regardless, no men are allowed to masturbate unless a female guest grants him permission to do so and solely because she wants to view it. All men coming should assume this will be an activity initiated by the ladies at our parties (regardless of whether it actually happens) and must decide for themselves prior to attending whether they would be comfortable participating as well as being in the presence of other nude men masturbating. Again, the level of such activity is always determined in advance by the women hosting and attending our parties, with much of the determination being how comfortable the main body of women would be with it versus the visual attraction to it by a select few women.

• Q: Can I touch the guys?
  

  A: Like an expensive china store, the question came up early, can I touch what I see? By an almost unanimous consensus, women made the decision that at their discretion, they should be able to enjoy touching as part of the CFNM party experience. Thus, women coming can feel free to experience physically exploring through touch the nude physique of the male participants, including the touching, holding, fondling, feeling or rubbing his shoulders, chests, bare bums, thighs and genitals. This is a unique aspect of CFNM parties that women enjoy and is integral to many of the parties, although some are more conservative and do not allow it. Usually, the men coming have a general agreement before hand that they have given implicit permission for all women coming to touch them anywhere and at anytime. But don't expect to see a lot of extended sexual arousal or sexual acts, and fellatio is not permitted. Women are very tactile, and men coming should be honored by women wanting to explore through touching any part of their physique at will without expectation for anything more. This decision exclusively belongs to the women, but women women should be sensitive to the comfort of the men.