This Is The Tale Without A Plot,
It Was Writ Without No Thought
"BT is pleased to be announcing that she is so far out she is in!" announced BT.
"BT is in where?" asked Mike and sucked on his tail.
"MICKY IS PLEASED TO BE ANNOUNCING THAT MIKE IS TAILLESS THANK YOU MA'AM AND GOODNIGHT!!" shouted Sassip.
"Mike looked at Sassip like she threw her brain out into the trash and slapped her about with his tail." narrated Mike.
"Mr. Continuity boy wishes to announce that you are all way messed up," said Peter shaking his cute lil head.
MICKY SAYS MISTER CONTINUITY IS JUST AS MESSED UP TOO!" shouted Micky and stepped on Mike's tail evilly.
"Micky is displeased to be hearing BT's constant third-person narratings," said MT, who was really screwed up.
"MICKY IS PLEASED TO BE REMOVING HIS FOOT FROM AL'S TAIL!" shouted Mike and yanked his tail from out from under Micky's foot. Al shrugged and looked at her tail which no one was on.
"I have a tail," Davy said thoughtfully and munched his cruncheous tasties.
"Too many people have tails for BT to step on." mused BT and stepped on Davy, Mike and Al's tails.
"OUCH!" shrieked Davy, lip all a-quiver until Sassip whined about people giving lip and BT was all a-remorse.
Al laughed and 10 minutes realized her tail hurt. "Huh.." she said and walked off to find Mike because she wanted to play with his tuft while he was stupid.
"I will play with Sassip's headspikes now," announced BT and shimmied up her.
"OH! IS SASSIP A GUEEEETAR!?" shouted Mike, running in, with his tuft all nicely braided and hairsprayed in place.
"OMIGOSH MIKE IS GIRLIER THAN MICKY WITH THE BRAIDS!" shrieked Micky in a high-pitched feminine voice, and then he fell over.
Al snigged and took Micky into the bathroom.
"OH OH SORDID BATHROOM ENCOUNTERS NO NO," shouted Sassip and punted the Pad.
Micky wandered out in a daze sometime later smelling of hair gel and shampoo and with his hair in 50 tiny braids.
"Oh," said Peter quietly and fainted dead away.
"PLEASE TO NOT BE SNIGGING AT MICKY!" shouted Micky and stalked off to the bedroom to fix his hair. Mike on the other hand didn't even care or notice.
"I dinnit snigg. Yet," said BT. But she was WRONG oh yes.
Micky stuck his head out of the door and threw Davy's shoes at her because he didn't need them anymore.
"HEY! MY SHOES!" sniffed Davy.
"Davy I rescued your shoes!" said Sassip neatly, and plucked them out of BT's rabid grasp.
"I am a fewel who's not a man without a plaaannn." sang Mike and doinked Davy's nose.
"Mike has a plan?!" said Peter, instantly reviving with quill and parchment at the ready to jot down important plot points (even though there was no plot).
"I have a plan?" asked Mike.
Davy giggles coquettishly and doinked Mike's nose.
"Don't do that!" said Mike and fell over.
BT giggled coquettishly and doinked Davy's nose.
"MINE MINE MINE NOOOOO NOT FOR YOU MINE FOR MEEEE!!!" Sassip shouted and punted BT all the way to the other side of the room. For well we know that seabeasties are quite territorial about their pouch babies. Which Davy of course was.
"Fishboy!" said Mike hickishly and giggled in a heap on the floor.
"I don't like this anymore," said Link and crawled out of Sassip's pouch, and shook pouch cats out of his hat. "They are like parasites on me!"
Five cats had attached themselves to Al. "NO NO NO I AM NOT A CAAAAAAAAT" she shrieked and ran about.
"OH OH AL IS SPAZZING," said BT, also spazzing and setting several people aflame.
"MY PANTS! MY PANTS ARE ON FIRE!" shouted Mike, jumping up and running around.
"STOP, DROP AND DROOOL!" shouted Sassip and drooled on him.
"Micky wishes to announce his displeasure at being firing," announced Micky distinctly and went to soak in milk and Coke.
"WHAT GOES WITH BEANS!? MILK! MILK!" shouted Mike and crammed a truckload into his mouth, before realizing he had no milk.
"Oh! YUM!" said Micky and filled the tub with beans.
"OMIGOSH how did he do that?!" said Al.
"You're pulling my tail." said Mike boredly and pulled Al's tail.
"NO YOU ARE PULLING MINE!" shrieked Al and wrenched it from him and ran around in pain.
"OH hehehehe Al can be tickled!" said Mike and tickled Al.
"YACKAHABEAHBHRBAHDAJHSKAHKSJA!" shouted Al and smacked Mike in the mouth with her tail.
"MMMBF..." said Mike and wandered away with a mouthfulla fur in a huge daze.
"MOMMY Mickyyyyy-yee-yee-yee lied at me and said things wenty better with Coca-Cola but I wenty them with breffast serals and they didn't wenty tasty good!!" MT cried.
Al stared hard at Mickybraidboy and snigged.
"Well, dear, you know what they say. Braids are unbecoming." said Al, but no one knew what in blue tarnation that meant.
"What about Mike's plan?" asked Peter who was still ready with fountain pen and vellum.
"It is not a plan now, it is, uh, uh, uh, a prawn!" said Mike, nodding vigorously.
"I am not a prawn either!" exclaimed Davy and threw things in a fit of rage, as Mike his Chicken fry buddy was out of his blinkin' head.
"You are not? I will see," said Sassip, dipping Davy in some tartar sauce she had in her pouch and munching him tasty.
"Davy wenty better with cookie cola?" MT wanted to know.
"WHAT GOES WITH CAKE? MILK! MILK!" shouted Mike in a fit of hilarity and rolled off to find some grapes.
"Micky wants to know why Mike is pleased to be looking for grapes," stated Micky imperiously.
Al snigged and rolled Micky off to the bedroom to redo his hair which was not horridly braided anymore.
Mike rolled back in. "Where is my graperolling Fishbrethren?" he asked and looked high and low for Davy.
"OMIGOSH YOU DON'T BROIL GRAPES!" screeched BT and rolled off to look for pomegranates.
"I am not your Fishbrethren! C'mon Mike let's go to a chickenfry!" said Davy angstily, crawling out of Sassip's mouth. She forgot to swallow, the fool.
"Chicken fry pahties are for fewels!!" shouted Mike and rolled around like a deranged tennis ball in a gale.
Davy was agast and began to weep bitterly.
"OH POOR BABY," said BT and attempted to coddle him but was punted to .... somewhere.
Just then Micky ran out with his cotton gun and began firing at Al who was in hot pursuit.
"YOU NEED MORE GEL!" she was shouting when a huge wad of cotton went into her mouth.
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" shouted Micky and fell down the flight of stairs.
"Oh, THAT bedroom!" said Mike and shook his head in disapproval.
"Micky is pleased to be doing his OWN hair thank you very much!!" he said, stalking into the bathroom and emerging with the fro from *cuckoo*.
"Oh look look we are all going to die HEHEHEHEE," said BT foolishly and curled up in Sassip's pouch.
"I am me and me is I and there is glue upon me!" Mike sang happily.
"No, Mike, wrong story! Don't you remember me!?" said Davy plaintively and had a very unhappy look upon his cute lil facey-poo.
"YES you are my fishybrethren and the author says you have a cute facey-poo hey hey!" said Mike and blinked at Davy.
"ARGH!" shouted Davy and backed away in fear.
"Soooo cuuuuuuute," said Sassip and BT and they drooled until BT realized Sassip was drooling on her head, and squirmed out of the pouch.
"Glue for me!" said Mike amiably and was severely chided by Pita Continuity Boy for dwelling on old plots.
"YOU are not a girl stop hitting on Davy." said Micky, a little too late.
"Aren't I, Micky? Aren't I?" said Mike, matter-of-factly. "OMIGOSH! Wait! No I'm not!" and went to take a droolpool clothes bath.
"I'm a girl!" BT said cheerfully.
"You are not," said everybody except MT who said, "I wenty go Cokings."
BT huffed off in a rage.
"I am also in a rage." Peter said. "BE-cause there is no plot, it is just random storylines I'll have you know, that the authors have completely flipped!"
"Those authors know how to make me flip. WHOAYHELL!" shouted Mike.
"THAT'S WHY I SAID I'M SO FAR OUT I'M IN!" said BT happily.
"You are in Sassip's pouch," announced Al and placed her there.
"Oh I am here with Link," said BT and curled up for slee time.
"HOW DID I GET BACK IN HERE??" shouted Link who was always astounded at how many times he woke up in Sassip's pouch.
"I poofed you there," said Sassip with satisfaction.
"You are not a fignut!!" protested Link in anger.
"No I poofed him go wenty in the pouch time," said MT sweetly.
"Oh oh oh don't do that honey MT Micky like but not thing!" said Al and picked him up and took him away.
"Oh oh so cute," drooled BT and Link wrung out his hat cause between her & Sassip it was really drooly.
"Micky is cute," said Micky smugly to himself and rolled off to a freak festival.
"OMIGOSH NO MORE WITH THE ROLLING PLAGIARISM!" Davy whinged.
"Yeh Micky is cute..." said Sassip, Al and Mike. Then they all stared hard at each other and shouted "EWWWWWW I NEVER SAID THAT" and ran off.
"Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh *OOH*!!" shouted Peter and scribbled furiously on his continuity stenographer's pad.
"I think YOU are cute!!" BT announced and combed his hair incessantly.
"Thank you!" said Micky too late again.
"I smilk without shame!" said Mike and smilked.
"I have a turkey, cheese and bacon sandwich." the author informed everyone.
"MINE FOR ME!" shouted Micky and lunged.
"I'm NOT a sandwich. I'm NOT a sandwich! This lettuce is fake!" shouted Mike and stalked off angrily, no longer in a smilking mood.
"OMIGOSH MICKY REFERRED TO HIS CUTE SELF USING A FIRST PERSON PRONOUN!" Al exclaimed.
People stared.
"Uh," she said and filed Micky's nails.
"No thank you, I BITE them!" Micky said proudly and did just that.
"I'm *NOT* a sandwich!" Mike muttered tetchily, returning from where ever it was he stalked off to.
"MOMMY MOMMY! MIKE IS A STALK OF SELLERY!" shouted MT and giggled his cute little head off.
"But you are dressed as one!" protested Peter.
"THEY dressed me up like this, and these aren't my pants, they're MICKY'S!" Mike said and was almost in tears.
"PLEASE to be returning them at me," said Micky irately.
"HOW did you get into Micky's pants? Heeeyeeee Micky doesn't have celery pants..." said Al suspiciously.
"Micky disavows any knowledge of that!" said Micky and zipped off quickly.
"He lies," said BT who knew everything about everyone's clothes.
"You are a parsnip," snapped Davy.
"4672." said Al proudly. "That's for loose parsnips by bulk. You have to weigh them."
"WHAAAAAAAAAA?" shouted everyone and stared.
"Uh.. nothing.." Al muttered and starched Micky's clothes while he was still wearing them.
"PLEASE to be STOPPING!" said Micky and was horrified.
"Al is cashmere!" announced BT.
"MOMMY CASHMORE MONEY FOR MEEEE EMMMMMTEEEEEEE?" shouted MT and looked for Hotwheels and Jellomolds for him.
"Oh SO CUTE!" said BT and melted cause she never did for stories and was tired of being a solid so she glooped around and stickified people's shoes.
"NO NO STICKIFYING IS MINE FOR ME!" screeched MT.
"No you want that not, honey behives that hurt when you steal stickiness." said Al and hustled him off to his tinkertoy room in Peter's mindpad.
"I am liquid," said BT with delight and got on Davy's shoes.
"Davy is my muffin!" said Mike happily.
"MINE," Sassip growled in a menacing possessive tone.
"*MINE*!!!!!!" said Al and poofed everyone into jello molds.
"Oh! There is mine cashmores from Mommy!" said MT, poofing in and playing with someone that was Sassip.
"That is not me," said Sassip suspiciously.
"It is Micky," said Peter who was on the ball.
"I confess!" said Micky and was not Sassip no longer nope.
"MOMMY I HAVE A TALKY MOLDY!" shouted MT and dropped Micky.
"OUCH!" said Micky but did not break because he was PLASSSSSSSSSS-TICK!
"Time for me not to be one," said BT and was not one.
"One what?" asked Mike.
"A JELL-O MOLD!" said BT.
"O-R-E-*O*." said Mike huffily and danced about looking for Davy.
"Why do you want to find MEEE?" said Davy in fear.
"I have chi-ih-ih-icken fry for yooo-hoo-hoo-hooo!" sang Mike.
"That is not chicken fry that is GLUE!" said Davy in a dismayed tone.
"MIKE NO MORE GLUE THAT IS OLD AND USED-UP!!" Peter said in angst and tore his hair out.
"NNOOOOOOO I WUV YOU SCHNOOKUMS BABY," said BT and coddled him.
"Awww but if this isn't chicken fry then what did I put on my...." said Mike and stared at chicken fry stuck to his wings. "AIIIIIEEEEEEEE" he shrieked and ran around showering all with chicken fry.
"CHICKEN FRO?!" said Micky and clattered around.
"We should put Jell-O in moldy people," said MT.
"HEY HEY HEY! WHO IS NOT A MOLD ANYMORE!??!!" shouted Peter. He had turned himself back. Somehow Mike had avoided it (no one knows how), Davy, Sassip and Micky were still molds. Link was nowhere to be seen.
"I fix them," said BT stupidly and made Davy & Micky people persons again.
"WHAT ABOUT MEEEEEEEEE?!" whined Sassip.
"You are too obtrusive," said BT and wrinkled her nose.
"Hey hey I am obtrusive!" said Micky and yelled a lot.
"I WILL STARCH YOUR NOSE FOR YOU, BT!" said Al.
"Oh no no no!" said BT to herself but forgot to run. Her nose was soon crisp and clean and fit to be doinked. But no one wanted to, except Mike who was thwarted with a well placed gluepot.
"I will!" said BT and doinked her own nose.
"Oh wow that is dumb," said Davy silently.
"YOU CANNOT TALK SILENTLY HEHEHEHEEEEEE," Micky shrieked.
Sassip dragged Micky into the bathroom to do his hair.
"OH wow that jello mold can really style!" said Micky, coming out with his hair same as it always is.
"YAY he is not froboy," BT said contentedly and tried to braid his antlers but to no avail.
"No please," said Micky decisively and shook her off.
"TIME FOR ME!" announced MT and frolicked.
"I will frolic with you!" said Sassip and did.
Just then Davy managed to thunk the Mike's hat back on Mike's hat.
"OHHWOO!" said Mike loudly and fell over.
"OOOOOOOOOOH!" said BT, "PRRRRRRITTY!" and tried to touch his tuft.
"NO NO NO! NO TOUCHIE!" shouted Mike, popping up all of a sudden.
"AAAIIYYYYYEEEEEE!!!!!" shouted MT and BT and Micky, to wit all three started running around spazzing.
"Oh my...." said Al and Mike and Peter and Peter wrote this disturbing turn of events into his book of lore. Er.. continuity.
"NO SPAZZING FOR YOU YOU NONMICKY THING!" Micky said and punted BT with his antlers.
"ONLY ME SPAZZING TIME!" said MT and somehow poofed Micky into an owl.
"I want the tuffftttt," BT said rabidly and frothed while staring at Mike's hair.
"HERE HERE I LIKE THIS NOT!" said Micky and plummeted to the floor cause he still had him-sized antlers.
"BWAHAHAHAHAHA" guffawed Al and rolled in hilarity at Micky. "Oh ick I am covered in hilarity..." she sniffed in disgust and went to take a clothes shower.
"Wow.. what HAPPENED?" said Mike, rubbing his hat.
"YOU WENTY STOOOPID!" shouted MT and spazzed happily.
"WHAT in blue tarnation!?!? That is NOT right!" shouted Mike and backed away, trying to protect his wings. He grabbed Al by the tail as she was walking out from her clothes shower and lobbed her bodily at MT.
"Please to be knowing that Al is not a Ping-Pong ball," said Micky helpfully.
"PEAPONGGGGGGGG," screamed BT and fired muslin at Micky who in turn fired cotton at Mike who in turn fired corduroy at Davy who in turn fired velvet at Al who in turn fired cashmere at MT who in turn fired polyester at Peter who in turn fired silk at Link who in turn zapped Sassip who shoved everyone in her pouch and swimmied on out to an island.
THE END.
Next Issue: MT decides Micky and Al should be married for his mommy and daddy (respectively) and after whiles of naggings they finally agree until Al turns kiddie again.
Back to the scary Mike glue death allergy thing
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