It's 8:26 PM. Do you know where your children are?
They Ain't Your Average Twinkies

Al was curled up in Mike's hat taking a nap when Mike came in a put his hat on.
"OWUGHHESHSG!" they both said as Al fell out of Mike's hat.
Mike fixed his hair and put his hat on again.
"Don't do that!" they said at once and stared hard at each other.
Then BT bounded in.
"Hi guys where's Micky!?" she asked as if no one knew what she was going to say anyway.
Everyone rolled their eyes and went back to what they were doing.
Al had crawled back up into Mike's hat, much to Mike's dismay.
"Don't do that." he said again. Al didn't move this time.
Mike sighed and went to get some Coke.
Micky ran in, saw BT and turned around in mid run.
"MICKY!" screeched BT and ran after him. Then Peter walked in. But he looked odd.
"What's up Peter, you look odd." said Mike, leafing through a newspaper.
"Oh.. nothing..." said Peter with an evil grin.
"Uh.. you okay? You look evil." said Micky, running in and coming to a stop when he saw Peter's grin.
"Yeh!" said BT who had slammed into Micky.
"Oh yes I'm quite fine." said Peter evilly.
"Hey hey stop with this evil stuff!" said Mike.

All of a sudden Al the author noticed for some odd reason she didn't put Davy in the story yet.
"Oops, sorry Davy, knew I was missing something." says Al the Author.
"How did you forget ME you favourite!?" shouts Davy.
"Um, dunno, well, there you go!" said Al the Author.

POOF and Davy was in the middle of the pad.
"Sheesh where did YOU come from!?" asked Mike.
"I dunno! Anyway what's up with Peter?" said Davy.
"How should I know!?" Ah, where is Al?" asked Micky. Suddenly Al was right in Micky's face.
"WHAT!? You got a PROBLEM with me!?" she sneered angrily at him, right in his face.
"Whaaa?? No no I was.. uh..." said Micky.
Mike looked confused. He took off his hat and noticed Al was also curled up happily taking a nap. He looked to and fro at both Als for several moments.
"What's wrong, Mike? You look like you've seen a ghost!" said Davy.
"No.. just double figments.... take a look!" proclaimed Mike, shoving Al in the hat at Davy.
Davy stood there looking to and fro until Al woke up and sneered. "Quit staring at me I'm trying to sleeeeppp!" she said, angrilly pulling the hat closed.
Mike poked Al until she woke up again. "WHAT?!" she nearly screeched, falling out of the hat. Mike pointed at the other Al who was just STARING at Micky. Micky was frozen in his step.
Al was astonished.
"YOU!" she said.
"ME!" said the other one evilly and turned Al into an unhatched Dragon egg.
"oooggbfff!" said Al the egg.
Then BT walked in and spied Micky. And Al.

"NONONO AL THAT'S MY MICKY YOU GET YOUR OWN MINE MINE MINE!" said BT.
"Oh yeh? Ya lil brat! I'll teach you!" said Evil Al and turned Micky into BT's father.
BT just stared. "I'm.. your........ daughter.......... NOOOO WAHKFJHAKLEHGKABDLJAGDSLJABXAJHBSJKAGBJA!" said BT spazzing.
Micky did likewise.
Evil Al nudged Evil Peter and they sauntered around the place messing things up.
Evil Al turned Davy into a lamp, and Mike into a dodo.
Peter giggled evilly and suggested things for her to do.
Then the other BT walked in.
"HEEYYy! You guys stop it!" she said, changing everyone back.
Evil Al sneered at Good BT.
"OH YOU NIT!" she cried and a poofing match ensued.
They both turned each other into things and back again. It was very confusing and Davy and Mike hid somewhere.
To avoid further confusion (TOO LATE) we shall now refer to the figments & the Peters as Good Peter, Evil Peter, Good Al, Evil Al, Good BT, and Nit BT.
Good Al stepped out of the line of fire for a minute and shouted, "Cover for me, BT, whilst I cook something up!" Both BTs said "Okay!" and then Nit BT glared at Good BT. They kept turning people into and out of things while Evil Al turned them into and out of things and stuff. Good Al went and sat in the corner & concentrated very hard until everyone was themself.

"Huh?!" said Evil Al. "I can't mess around with them anymore!"
"What'd you do?" whispered Nit BT to Good Al.
"Not much, I just put a little sort of lock on them. It's easy to break but we have to distract Evil Al K?"
"K," whispered Nit BT, & went to cling on Micky. Good BT stopped her.
"Be nice," she said.
"What?!" shouted Nit BT.
"He's your father."
"AL!! Why didn't you f-oooofff," BT trailed off as Good Al clapped a hand over her mouth and hissed, "SSHHHHH!" and went to look for Davy.

Evil Al thought for a minute, and then cackled triumphantly. "Hey Al! DAVY'S YOUR COUSIN!!"
"Huh? No he's not," said Al, and, upon finding Mike's hat (with Mike attached to it), crawled in and fell asleep.
"Ooh!" Davy said, popping up from his hiding place. "I AM Al's cousin!"
"Well, what was the point of THAT?" said Nit BT.
"Now now, be nice to the authors," said Good BT.
"Oh shut up, you know the authors are NUTJOBS," snapped Nit BT.
Good BT gasped. "Oh my!! That isn't at all nice," she said, & stuck her self-righteous fingers in her stuck-up goody-good li'l ears.
"Now, I don't think it's very nice for the authors to talk that way about a character they created, I mean, after all-"
"SHUT UP!!!!" screamed Micky. "MY GOSH, BT, she's worse than YOU!!"
"Ack!! I've been beaten!" shouted Nit BT & flew at Good BT, and they ended up in a huge silly fight which Micky & the Peters watched intently because they were bored.

Meanwhile, Davy was staring at Al funnily. "My twinklies won't even work anymore, man! What a drag."
"Oh no, don't test the twinklies Davy...this story is confusing enough without you fallin' in love with someone," Mike said.
"Maybe someone should stop the BTs before they kill each other," Good Peter said.
Evil Peter giggled (a very very odd sound). "Nooo it's FUNNYY!!" he said, & produced a record player from behind his back, which was playing Merry Go Round.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" everyone shrieked, & dropped to the floor, cowering, with their hands over their head.
"Ooh, that's not scary," said Good Peter. "Heehee, I like that song."
Evil Al glared at him, and then blinked at Mike. "Mike is Al's father now, just so y'all know. And....Peter is BT's brother."
"And the point of all this is??" said everyone.
"Um...I...WELL, AREN'T I EVIL?" she said sulkily.
"Not very," said Good BT.
"YES SHE IS!! She made Micky my faaaa-therrrrr," sobbed Nit BT, & decked Good BT while she was giving a self-righteous snot lecture on how Evil Al really just wanted love and attention and a good home with pink flamingos in the yard and three dogs and a cat and lovely mango trees in the back yard and a swimming pool and a jacuzzi and...well, it goes on.

Davy got mad and kicked Evil Al in the tush.
"Take that Red Baron!" he said angrily.
"OOH I'll make you BT's cousin you..." started Evil Al but she didn't get much further with it as Evil Peter came up and whispered something in her ear.
Mike meanwhile was bossing Good Al around and taking general advantage of the situation.
"But I'm not really..." said Al.
"Yes, you are. either you change us back or else!"
"But I'm almost the same AGE as you!" said Al.
"Tell that to evil Al!" said Mike.
"What, you were four when you..." but Good BT had grabbed Good Al's mouth and tsked her.
"No no no! You don't talk about that stuff! Potty mouth!' she said, washing Al's mouth out with soap.
"Gargle bolarhgyghrh!" said Al, spitting soap everywhere. "THAT'S THE LAST STRAW!" screeched Good Al, forming a huge black cloud around her and sending it out after Evil Al and Peter, and Good BT.
"I DUNNO WHERE YOU CAME FROM BUT NOW YOU GO POOF!" she shrieked as the clouds began to emit lighting and fizz and pop and crackle.

The Evils and the Goods began running around frantically. Evil Al was hurriedly turning people into things and Peter was blasting Merry Go Round and Good BT was lecturing her tush off.
But eventually they were hit by the lighting and once hit they disappeared back to where ever they came from.
"PHEW!" said Al, poofing everyone back to normal.
"YAYAYAYAYAYEARGH!" shouted BT jumping all over Micky.
"Al, you get out of my hat this instance!" shouted Mike, but to no avail.
Davy twinkled at Mike's hat. And Micky ran around screaming. Peter was still humming Merry Go Round.

PETER KNOCK IT OFF! said everyone.

THE END.

Next Issue: Al & BT switch brains.

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