Coming to you live from a filling station in Peoria...
Got Mick?

AHEM:

One day, (like usual, as no days have any description.. well..)

AHEM:

One TUESDAY, everyone was sitting around eating fish, with Micky and BT eating their baked fish, lasagna and pickle sandwiches.
Al was sitting over a little bunsen burner with a bunch of weird liquids.
"Yellow to purple... green to blue, orange with swirlies... and.. PRESTO! I've got it!"
"Got what?" said Davy moodily. There was no more fish.
"Got Mick!" said BT, grabbing Micky.
"NONO!" said Micky.
"I perfected this formula to let you guys into OUR pad! I mean, you always let us in yours..."
"Noooo way! I'm sick of birdseed!" said Davy.
"AND Pistachios." said Peter.
"How did you know THAT?" said Al.
"Um.. I think Davy was muttering about it for a month."Said Peter.
"Well. You'll be able to get into our pad someday. But that's the next issue." said BT.
"How did you know that?" asked Micky.
"Well, I ... uh.. dunno. I think I read the menu." said BT.
"Well, I wanna go in NOW!" pouted Peter.
"Sorry old buddy, but you heard what they said." said Mike. He didn't REALLY wanna go in but he was curious, plus he heard they had some good grub in there.

"Right!" said Al, passing out glasses of purple/orange/red/green/blue swirly liquid.
"Uh, is that safe?" asked Davy.
"Yep! Safe as safe can be!" said Al. "But don't drink it, BT or we become people."
BT sniffed the liquid but quickly put it down.
The three Monkees drank their potions.
"Well, here we go!" said Al.
"But I don't FEEL any different..." said Micky.
"Well.... I dunno, but here we go! By the way, this is permanent, so you can come in and out whenever ya want! It will broaden out horizons and.. oh sorry.. *POOF*" said Al.

Suddenly they were in Al and BT's pad. BT looked excited. So much so, infact, that she had this funny pained look on her face.
"You okay, BT?" said Al.
"UmMickylooklookitatmybirdseedandpistachiocollectionisn'titgreatIloveitOMGyouguysareINhereanditssoooooooneatIcan'thandleithelpAHAl..." said BT, and she promptly fell into a huge pile of the seeds and nuts.
"Oh dear..." said Al, and she reluctantly dug BT out.
"WHAT THE...??" said Al.
"What the what?" said Davy.
"Um.. Micky?" said Al.
"Yeh?" said Micky.
"Where are you right now?"
"Right behind you with Davy and Mike."
"That's what I was afraid of."

"What? Oohh...I sound funny..." said BT, then looking at her clothes. "How come...OOH I'm taller too, and-"
"BT, YOU NIT!! YOU'RE *MICKY*!!!"
"Huh?"

Al proceeded to punch her, but since this is a family story, we now take you to the house of Mr. & Mrs. Roberts and their two children Buffy & Twinkie & their happy dog Muffin, sitting around the table on a Saturday afternoon eating fried chicken.

"Nice day at work, dear?"

And now, back to our regularly scheduled Al & BT story.

Micky looked funny. "What was THAT all about?"
"Oh hold on...are you you or BT?" Mike said.
"I'm me," both Mickys said.
"DON'T DO THAT," said the real Micky.
BT-Micky blinked sillily.
Davy just stared. "Oh, man...that's WEIRD. That's just weird, and strange, and unnatural, and-"
"Oooh, lookahere, pretty buttons & switches," a Micky said happily.
"Are you Micky Micky or fake Micky?" said everybody.
"I'M Micky!!" they both said indignantly, & then glared at each other. "YOU," they said in unison, "are NOT Micky," & proceeded to fall on Davy.
"QUIT THAT!!!!" said Mike. "Now...well here, we'll just ask one of 'em something that only Micky would know. Ah...lessee...what color socks are you wearing right now?"
"Green," they both said.
"Well, you're both wrong," Mike said, & shook his head.

"'Ey Al, can we mess around with stuff like milk waterfalls now?" Davy said, tugging on Al's sleeve.
"Don't do that," she said. "Yes, yes you can. BUT BE CAREFUL, 'cause you'll probably do something dumb," Al warned the Mickys.
Mike concentrated very hard, & a cow appeared.
"What the- I wasn't even tryin' to get anything LIKE a cow!!"
Davy smirked. " I guess it had nothing to do with milk, eh?"

Everyone except Davy & Al looked horribly confused. The Mickys were looking at each other suspiciously & evilly.
Al made a weird face. "It SHOULDN'T happen...I mean, cows just appearing...it's not right, somehow." She went and explained a bit to Mike, who managed to make an air mattress & three jars of cinnamon-sugar mix appear before finally getting what he wanted (which was a steak sandwich). While he munched on that, one of the Mickys kicked each other when the other one wasn't looking.

"Dun do that," said the other other Micky.
"Wait...are you the Micky that just got kicked, or...other other?? What is this other other stuff?" said one.
"I dunno man, what say we go talk to the writers?"
"You talk to the writers ENOUGH," said Mrs. Roberts, and then went back to her lovely house with plastic-covered furniture.
Mike looked at everyone strangely. "WHAT is with that??"

*Meanwhile in the pad*
Peter fell asleep on the couch. This is of no consequence whatsoever to anybody else, but we felt you should know. Thank you.

*Back in Peter's mind*
Davy was perfecting his milk waterfalls, with Al tsking him left and right and cleaning up his mess.
"Davy, make a GLASS! PLEASE!" Al pleaded.
Davy just smirked and made a merrygoround.
"Now why'd you go and do that?" said Mike. He tried to get rid of it, but only made it into a giant rotten fish.
"Why did YOU do that?" asked Davy, staring at Mike oddly. He shook his head, made a face like he was trying REALLY hard and out pops a cake where the fish used to be.
"Oh boy! I could really get used to this!' he said, stuffing his face with cake and milk waterfall.

Meanwhile, Al was staring at the Mickys. "Okay... we'll have a test. Whoever can POOF a baked fish, lasagna and pickle sandwhich and have it NOT taste good is BT. Ready?"
Both Mickys squinted and both Micky's produced a sandwhich. And Al tasted both *reluctantly*.
"OMIGOSH NEITHER OF THEM ARE BT! THESE SANDWICHES ACTUALLY TASTE GOOOOODDD!" said Al, cramming them both into her mouth at the same time.
Davy gave her a dirty look.
"Look who's talking, Mr. Cake-face." said Al.
Davy sighed and went back to cramming cake and milk waterfall into his mouth. Mike had joined him.

Al sighed. "Man, BT, I wish I knew which one was REALLY you, so I could turn you back!"
Both Mickys looked at each other and shrugged. "THAT ONE! I dun wanna be BT!" they both said in unison.
"Well one of you IS and one of you HAS to be!" said Al.
"Weeelll..... No." they said.
"Well, the one that is BT doesn't have to have her clinging to you, hmm? Sound good, does it?"
"NO!"
"UGH YOU!" said Al, but she didn't know which one to punch.

Davy walked over, poofed up a towel and wiped his face.
"Yeh, they really are spittin' images of Micky."
"I AM MICKY!' both announced self righteously.
"Its weird but the one that WAS BT doesn't seem to remember.
I think we just have to pick one!" said Al.
"But how would BT know everything about Micky and all?" asked Mike, grabbing the towel from Davy.
"I dunno, man!" Davy said, disappearing the towel. "Are you SURE BT didn't drink any of that weird stuff, Al? I mean, she has to still be a figment or she couldn't've snapped up the sandwich like that, whichever she is...but somethin' weird 'as to 'ave 'appened."

"Sheesh, Davy, you're awfully fond of apostrophes," remarked one of the Mickys.
"I don't think she did...although it's certainly nothing I'd put past her. But I don't think that'd do THIS. Maybe she did it just to be a twerp," Al mused.
"She doesn't do anything just to be a twerp," Mike protested. "She simply lives to be a twerp...no questions of DOING anything in particular to be a twerp, I mean, she just is one, man...it's her personality. Type B Twerp."
"Hey, is that what BT stands for?" Micky & Micky II asked. "B Twerp? Hey, shut up, I'M Micky. Nit."
"QUIET, YOU!!" screeched everybody.

*Back in the pad*
Peter woke up, rolled over, & fell asleep again.

*Back in his mind*
"Okay...let's see which one of them knows how to drum on a left-handed drum setup," Mike suggested.
"But BT has been practicing that for daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaays," Al pointed out. "Days...days...oh my...earplugs... absolutely traumatizing I tell you...rowdy kids, don't know what's gotten into them nowadays..." she muttered frenetically, & passed out amongst the birdseed.
Davy & Mike looked at her, & created a milk waterfall directly in front of her face.
"SPDHLOGSHS! DUN DO THAT!!" she screeched, & poured about 100 gallons of milk on them both. They went to have a shower somewhere, but realized it wasn't necessary, so they fixed their clothes (although the first time Mike wound up pouring tomato juice on his, & then he turned it into a dress, while Davy offered his pants, but Mike turned them down adamantly. Anyway) & apologized to Al rather insincerely.

"No-one...no-one should write a sentence that long," Mike complained.
"Micky...BT...what is BT like? She's a twerp. Whichever one of...nope, they're both twerps. Hhmmmm," Al thought. Then she turned to face the Micky twins.
"What do you know about BT?"
"Well, she's about this tall, an insufferable twerp, and I throw her a lot because she climbs on me," they both said.
Al rolled her eyes. "Anything else?"
"SANDWICHES!!!" they both shrieked, & proceeded to make & consume about six apiece.
Al watched in disgust. "Not even BT eats THAT much," she said, looking at Davy & Mike for help.

Davy sighed. "Micky, what's your favorite song?" he said.
"Pleasant Valley Sunday!" said one.
The other one looked thoughtful and then said, "I like um... wait.. I forget." he said.
Davy looked at Mike and Al with a confident look on his face.
"But you don't like Pleasant Valley Sunday do you?" asked Davy.
"Well I DO, but its not my favorite. I don't really have one." said BT.
"AHA! We found you out!"Davy and Al and Mike said triumphantly.
BT looked confused. They marked her so they wouldn't get mixed up again.
"Okay, here I go!" said Al. And POOF BT was herself again.
"Wow what happened?" she asked.
"You apparently had a Micky overload with him being in the pad and all..." said Al but BT was all over the real Micky again. Al sighed.

Next Issue: BT gets Al's powers, due to a mix-up with the cleaners.

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