Obvious Problems

One day in some month of some year after the day that they had found the magic crystals in the far far away pad of the Monkees, LP came a-calling again.
"Oh hum." she said and spied Micky.
"Hi guys." said Micky who had just walked in from doing something that he didn't know what it was.
"MIICKY!" shouted LP and leaped for him.
"Eek!" said Micky and put oh his forcefield real fast.
BOING! Off went LP into the wall.
"AAAHAHAHAHHA!" said Micky and fell on the ground laughing his head off.
"Tsk, that's not nice Micky!" said Al.
"Ah, you're no fun!" said Micky.
"Yeh I know." said Al and ate a book.
"Hmmm, she doesn't usually do that!" said Sassip.
"I know, she's been eating weird stuff since she got blown up by the crystal!" said Peter who had witnessed her scoffing the TV set the other night.
"Oh well, soooooo LP, whatcha want huh?" said Micky evilly.
"OOOHHH!" said LP angrily. "What was THAT?!"
But no one told her and she went and got MT and he spilled the beans all over the place.
"Aw MT, man, you gotta watch the beans! Now they're all dirty!" everyone intoned whinily.
MT looked confused and asked Al to pop up a lemonade pop. She managed to pop up a can of dog food.
"WAHHH!" said MT til LP got one for him.
"What?" said Al.
"Something's messed up with her..." said LP to Mike.
"Hey I heard that!" said Al.

Micky would have asked her for a BPFL but he was frightened. And LP certainly wouldn't.. but he decided to ask anyway.
"Hey, LP, uh, how about a BPFL huh? Please!?" he said looking cute. LP glared, she was getting a little better at controlling her powers, but no one else knew this. "A BPFL, eh?" I think I could manage that. LP concentrated real hard and Micky became a BPFL. "Um, oops..."
"You did that on PURPOSE!" He shouted squishily.
"DID NOT!" LP shouted back and turned her back to him, "And I don't like that sort of accusation."
"Insulting her was probobly not the best idea Mick...." Davy said.
"Insulting her?! INSULTING HER!!! She turned me into a sandwich!" Micky whined.
"And not a very good sandwich at that," said Mike, who decided that he should go check on his spark plug again.
LP stood across the room from Micky and refused to look at him.
Al was experimenting with MT.
MT was running for his life.
"Micky, you better apologize to LP." Sassip said, always a voice of reason, well not always, but she was just then.
"I won't!" Micky said angrily, and would have turned his back to LP if he had legs.
"Um, Al, do you think you could manage..." Davy began.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Micky, losing bits of himself all over the living room.

"Well," Peter began, thinking really hard, "It seems we have two little problems here, Micky is a large disgusting sandwich that no one likes to eat 'cept him and BT and LP. And Al can't control her powers."
"Thats for all of you who joined us late in the story," said Davy sarcastically.
MT looked at everyone in turn and grinned when he saw a big BPFL in the middle of the room, "LUNCH!!!! YAY!!!" He yelled and ran for the sandwich.
Sassip, feeling slightly protective of either poor Micky or MT's stomach, punted him across the room.
"WHEEEEE!" MT screeched till he hit the nearest wall.
"LP, please turn Micky..." Davy pleaded.
"NO!" LP said huffily and on the verge of tears.
Al was munching on some glasses.
"Mmm, here, I'll do it!" she said and poofed Micky back to normal.
"WAAAHH!!??!" said Micky. "Wh.. I.. er.. but.."
"What?" said Al with a mouthful of glass.
"I thought you lost control of your powers!" said Mike.
"Nope, I just have the sudden craving for GLASS!" said Al grabbing a window pane.
"You didn't ask did you? Mmm this is quality glass this is! Do we have any salt?" said Al.
"Anyway." said Sassip and made a face as Al devoured the whole pane.
"Okay, so now we have one big problem. Al is eating non foodstuffs." said Peter.
"Always the observant one..." said Mike, slapping Peter lightly on the face.
"Huh?" asked Peter.
"Nuttin." said Davy and went over to Al.
"Al, do you mind not eating out pad? Thanks!" he said.
"Mmm but Davy its SOOO delicious!" said Al, offering him a piece.
"Uh, no thanks.." he said, running over and sliding on Sassip.
"She really DOES make him stupid!" said Mike.
"Told ya!" said Peter.
"So anyway.. I think the crystal blew up her brains too!" said Micky.
"Yeh, LP you gotta help!" said Peter.
LEMMYADEPOPS!" said MT giggling happily from the wall in which he crashed.
LP turned around and sighed. "What exactly am I sposed to do about Al?!" she asked.
"Uh, I dunno. Make her sane again!" said Micky.
"I have a better idea!" she said and turned Al into an aardvark and Micky and Mike into a salt and pepper shaker set.
"Ugh!" said Mike and sneezed salt everywhere.
LP giggled with glee.
"Oooh this is FUN!" she said.
"Hey I thought you couldn't do stuff like that!" said Micky whinily.
"I can't! I just did stuff, I didn't pick what I wanted to turn you into, but it's SO funny!" said LP.
"Yeh, well, AL turn us back!" said Mike.
"Uh, I can't." said Al.
"WHY?!" said Mike and Micky.
"I'm an aardvark........" said Al.
"So?" said Micky.
"I dunno! I don't think aardvarks can use powers.... oh wait.. uh....." said Al.
"WHAT!?" said Micky and Mike.
Al tottered over to them and took them into the cupboard. "I lost my powers," she whispered.
"How!?" they whispered frantically.
"HOW!?" said Davy outside and started giggling.
"SHUT UP!" all three yelled at him.
"Um, for some reason my powers didn't shrink with me.. I think LP's powers screwed it up somehow.. and um, Peter has them now!" said Al.
"PETER!? Oh great..." said Mike.
"Well, we'd better try and get them back!" said Micky.

They went outside and looked at Peter casually. LP had gone upstairs to take a bath.
"Peter, you have Al's powers!" they all said quietly.
Peter looked bewildered. "ME!!?" he asked.
"YES! You walked into them or something!" said Al.
"Oh well..." said Peter.
"Actually they're stuck to your foot." said Al, watching Peter's foot with much interest.
Peter looked down at his foot and shrugged. "Okay, so what do you want ME to do?" He asked.
"Oh, I dunno," said Mike, "TURN US BACK TO NORMAL MAYBE!" He yelled as best he could as a salt shaker.
"No need to get angry Michael." Peter pouted.
"Oh, don't you start with that too," said Micky.
Peter concentrated on them really really hard, for a moment nothing seemed to happen, then the salt and pepper shakers grew a bit and became a set of lovely silverware.
"What is it with us and dinner table settings?" Mike asked Micky hopelessly.
"Um, lemme try that again." Peter said and concentrated again.
The silverware shifter into a table cloth and a surprised looking pot of petunias.
"Um, I think I'm getting the hang of this." Peter said, "One more time..."
"NO!" Shouted the table cloth and petunias (Micky and Mike respectivly), "Um, concentrate on Al, if you can change her back she can take care of us."
"Oh, okay," Peter said and turned to Al the aardvark.
No one was really sure, but it looked like Al cringed.
Peter squinted at her.
She disappeared completely.
"Oh, well that's not good," said Peter.
"What did you do to her?" Asked Micky in despair.
"Um, I'm still here," came a small voice. "He changed me into a flea I think." Al said.
"Oops," said Peter and squinted at the space she was in a moment before.

Just then Sassip wandered outside. "Oh, nice petunias Peter," she said as she walked by with Davy.
"But that table cloth has to go," Davy said with disgust.
"HEY!" Shouted Micky, but Davy and Sassip were gone.
Unfortunately Sassip had broken Peter's concentration and there was now a 6 foot flea standing where Al the ardvark had been.
This frightened Peter for rather obvious reasons. "AUUUUUUUUUUUGH!" He yelped and hid under the paisley table cloth.
"Do you MIND!" said Micky, a little put out.
"Um, Peter, try again please." Al said, slightly uncomfortable, and restraining the urge to suck someone's blood.
Peter peeked out from under Micky and concentrated on Al again. She shrank about 3 inches and turned into a rather remarkable lookalike of LP.
Peter tried one more time and got it right finally.
Al tried to untangle her powers from his foot.
"Man how did these get so messed up?!" she said annoyedly.
"I dunno! I don't even feel anything!" said Peter.
"Yeh, well that's why you couldn't change us back well enough.... hmm.." said Al, finally getting them unstuck. She slipped them on quickly and poofed Mike and Micky back to normal.
"Oh, wow, my glass and house hold appliance craving is gone!" she said happily and ate some steak.
"Oh my.. how ravenous!" said Mike and wandered over to water his sparkplug.

Micky danced around and ran into the pad and hugged MT and then was disgusted he did that and ran to get a shower. He threw LP out of the bathtub and she slipped down the stairs.
"Man, what's with figments and taking bubblebaths in their clothes?!" said Davy.
Sassip shrugged and they went to find something to do.
Al sighed and looked for her book, then remembering she had eaten it she poofed up another.
Peter went back to playing on his keyboard and MT asked for a BPFL.
"NOOO!" shouted everyone just as LP said "Sure thing!"

The End.

Next Issue: Foopy LP figment thing loses her powers, teehee.

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