2May00
got an email from cory today....she's getting back together with her abusive football player boyfriend. i'm not surprised. cory will put up with a lot of shit from a guy who makes a million bucks a year....shit - she used to put up with a lot of shit from a guy who didn't make diddly. i don't get it. all of my friends are that way. they're all with these guys who are abusive or angry or alcoholics...granted, in indie's case i can relate cuz tyrone's changed so much and the things he's done to overcome his problems are simply amazing. i have a lot of respect for him...but i have to admit, i don't know if i'd have stuck it out as long as indie did to see the end result.
cory said something in her email about - "he has acces to this email account - and he likes to read mine..." i mean, come on - if there's no trust - what do you have? the very same thing came from nikki once. she and her husband share the same email account and she had to make sure i knew that he could get to them...first of all, what are we going to say that would be of so much interest to him?? and second of all...what the hell is he doing reading her stuff? she wanted to know how to delete sent messages and if the deleted messages were in a file somewhere that was accessible to him. i guess she does talk a lot of shit about him...she's never been happy with him. maybe he needs to read what she says...how else are they ever gonna work it out?
i guess i'm just upset because, number one - it's hard to respect your friends when they make choices to be with men like these creeps...and number two - because i'm so happy, and paul treats me so well....i want all the people that i love to experience this same kind of happiness.
i'm supposed to meet mary's boyfriend in june - he lives in oregon so we've planned a double date when he comes to visit next. i'm so worried that he's going to be a creep too - her last boyfriend was kind of a jerk - paul thought so too...i don't know, i just worry that she has the same tendencies to date the same kind of men. maybe it's me - i'm always making friends with these women who date these kind of men. it's an odd pattern...i should ask sam what it means...he's a psych major.
this one's not a joke - but i thought it was great!....
i guess i'm just a little worried that it means i have a low self esteem or something....and i need to surround myself with women who's lives are more chaotic than mine is to make me feel good or superior to them somehow....yuck...i hope that's not it.
oh, i almost forgot..... what do you think of my new home-page? write and let me know what you think! i'm also adding a daily horoscope for those who are interested. enjoy.....