These Are the Jokes Folks XI

These are my collection, since I've come, of Political jokes.

Clinton and the Pope died on the same day, but due to some Administrative foul up, Clinton gets sent to heaven & the Pope gets sent to hell. The Pope explains the situation to the hell administration, they check their paperwork, and the error is acknowledged. They explain, however, that it will take 24 hours to make the switch. 0n the next day, the Pope is called in and the hell administration bids him farewell and he heads for heaven.

On the way up, he meets Clinton on the way down, and they stop to chat. The Pope said sorry about the mix up and Clinton said "no problem". "Well, I'm really excited about going to heaven" said the Pope. "Why's that?" asked Clinton. "All my life I've wanted to meet the Virgin Mary" said the Pope.

"Ah," Clinton replies, "You're a day late... "

President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval office to see one of his aides nervously approach him. "What is it?" he yells. "It's this Abortion Bill, Mr. President. What do you want to do about it?" the aide asks.

"Heck, just go ahead and pay it."

Quayle, Gingrich, and Clinton are traveling in a car together in the Midwest. A tornado comes along and whirls them up into the air and tosses them thousands of yards away. When they come to and extract themselves from the vehicle, they realize they're in the Land of Oz. They decide to go see the Wizard of Oz. Quayle says, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for a brain!"

Gingrich says, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for a heart!"

Clinton says, "Where's Dorothy?"

Saddam Hussein calls Clinton up in the Oval office. "Hello, Bill?"

"Hey, Saddam."

"How are you doing. Let me tell you, I had the best dream last night."

"Really, what was it?"

"I was looking over all the U.S., and in every building, in its true glory had a flag waving on it, and huge banners on them."

"What did they say?"

"They read 'God is Allah, and Allah is God. Blessed is he!'"

"Wow," said the President. "That's remarkable. I had a very similar dream last night. I dreamt of Baghdad, looking even more glorious than it was before we demolished it, and every building had a flag on it, and huge banners across them."

"That is pretty amazing. Tell me, what did the banners say?"

"I'm sorry, but I don't know. I really can't read Hebrew."