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| Episode 4: (Scene is the council at Rivendell, but instead of Elrond the narrator lady is there) Narrator: Now then, you will face a series of challenges the last of which is returning the ring to the fiery chasm from whence it came. If you manage to do all this and hold true to each other, whoever is left living will get a share in an undisclosed amount of money. That, and evil incarnate will have been destroyed for all eternity. Boromir: But we never signed those waivers! Why should we have to do this? Couldn�t we just use the Ring, instead? Legolas: Have you heard nothing Lord Elrond- I mean, the narrator lady has said? The Ring must be destroyed! Gimli: The sooner it�s destroyed, the sooner we get away from these cameras! What are we waitin� for? (Nearly everyone agrees with Gimli, and they all get up to leave) Narrator lady: Wait, aren�t you going to start fighting with each other or anything? You know, all the �Who will take the ring?� and the �I suppose you think you�re the one to do it!� and let�s not forget �I will be dead before I see the Ring in the hands of an elf! No one trusts an elf!� Gimli: They don�t? Narrator (heaves an exasperated sigh): Don�t you people understand what reality TV is all about?! The Hobbits (in unison): What�s TV? Narrator lady: (mutters something inaudible) (Everyone leaves) Narrator lady: Hey! Get back here! I still have to proclaim that you shall become �The Fellowship of the Ring�! I thought of that title all by myself! It took me ages! GET BACK HERE!!!!! (No one pays attention) (Scene cuts to where everyone is leaving Rivendell. They�ve discovered the fact that the TV crew people have put hidden cameras in their luggage, and those really small hidden cameras in the buttons on everyone�s clothing. Everyone is muttering angrily) Boromir: It�s no use trying to escape the cameras! Not with 10,000 men could you do this! It is folly! Legolas (really hopeful): Maybe it�ll be like �Survivor� and we can get voted out of the Fellowship! (This appears to cheer everyone up) (Scene cuts to that hill place where in the movie they all stopped to rest) Gimli: If anyone was asking my opinion, which I note they�re not, I would say we were taking the long way �round! Don�t you want to get away from all these cameras? We could go through the Mines of Moria. My cousin Balin would give us a royal welcome! Gandalf: No, Gimli, I would take the road through Moria unless I had no other choice. Sam (Looking at a dark shape in the sky): What is that? Gimli: Nothing. It�s just a wisp of cloud! Boromir: It�s moving fast then, and against the wind. (Even though whatever it is is moving in the same direction as the wind is blowing his hair) Legolas (pointing at the things which everyone else now sees is a flock of birds, which normally wouldn�t be so alarming, but these birds have cameras strapped to them): Cameras from Dunland! (Camera switches to the birds� point of view, with the words �CrebainCam� in the upper right corner of the screen) Aragorn: HIDE!!!!!! (Everyone hides) (Once the birds pass, everyone comes out of their hiding places) Gandalf: Network spies! The passage south is being watched! We must go through the pass of Caradhras! (Points at gigantic snowy mountain) |