She was so blonde that:

1. Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight.

2. Couldn't learn to water ski because she couldn't find a lake with a slope.

3. Can't work in a pharmacy because the bottles won't fit into the typewriter.

4. Got excited because she finished a jigsaw puzzle in six months and the box said "2 to 4 years".

5. Was trapped on an escalator for hours when the power went out.

6. Couldn't call 911 because there was no 11 on any phone button.

7. When asked what the capital of California was, answered "C:

8. Burnt her nose bobbing for french fries.

9. Baked a turkey for three days because the instructions said one hour per pound and she weighed 125.

10. Can't make Kool-Aid because eight cups of water won't fit into those little packets.

11. Hates M&M's because they are to hard to peel.

12. Got hurt while raking leaves; fell out of the tree.

13. Changes the baby's diaper only once a month because the label said, "good up to 20 pounds."

14. After losing in a breaststroke swimming competition, complained that the other swimmers were using their arms.

15. What goes vroom-screech-vroom-screech,' etc.? A blonde at a flashing red light.

16. she called me to get my phone number.

17. she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."

18. she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

19. she got stabbed in a shoot-out.

20. she told me to meet her at the corner of "WALK" and "DON'T WALK."

21. she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

22. she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

23. she tried to drown a fish.

24. she thought a quarterback was a refund.

25. she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

26. under "education" on her job application, she put "Hooked On Phonics."

27. she tripped over a cordless phone.

28. she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

29. at the bottom of the application where it says "sign here"...she put Sagittarius."

30. it takes her two hours to watch 60 Minutes.

31. if she spoke her mind, she'd probably be speechless.

32. she studied for a blood test.

33. she thought Boyz II Men was a daycare center.

34. she thought Meow Mix was a record for cats.

35. she thought she needed a token to get on Soul Train.

36. she sold the car for gas money.

37. when she saw the "NC-17" (under 17 not admitted), she went home and got 16 friends.

38. when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

39. when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

40. when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home.

41. when told to run home in baseball she ran back to her house