cat_quotes

Famous Cat Quotes

Stephen Baker:
Cats' hearing apparatus is built to allow the human voice to easily go in one ear and out the other.

Kittens are born with their eyes shut. They open them in about six days, take a look around, then close them again for the better part of their lives.

Most beds sleep up to six cats. Ten cats without the owner.

As a housepet, I'm overqualified.
       - Speaking as a cat in How to Live with a Neurotic Cat

To bathe a cat takes brute force, perseverance, courage of conviction ? and a cat. The last ingredient is usually hardest to come by.

Hilaire Belloc:
You are my cat and I am your human.

Ellen Perry Berkeley:
As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.

Ellen Perry Berkeley:
As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat.

Charles J. Brady:
The real measure of a day's heat is the length of a sleeping cat.

Dereke Bruce:
In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.

Jean Burden:
Prowling his own quiet backyard or asleep by the fire, he is still only a whisker away from the wilds.

A dog, I have always said, is prose; a cat is a poem.

Maurice Burton:
Anyone who claims that a cat cannot give a dirty look either has never kept a cat or is singularly unobservant.

Martin Buxbaum:

If we treated everyone we meet with the same affection we bestow upon our favorite cat, they, too, would purr.

Dr. Louis J. Camuti:

There is something about the presence of a cat...that seems to take the bite out of being alone.

Winston Churchill:

I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.

Colette:

I am indebted to the species of the cat for a particular kind of honorable deceit, for a great control over myself, for a characteristic aversion to brutal sounds, and for the need to keep silent for long period of time.

Patricia Dale-Green:

There is one way in which cats differ from all other animals and that is in the effect they have on human beings.

Leonardo da Vinci:

The smallest feline is a masterpiece.

Jim Davis:

Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them.

Cats instinctively know the precise moment their owners will awaken...then they awaken them ten minutes earlier

Lenore Fleischer:

When you're special to a cat, you're special indeed - she brings to you the gift of her preference of you, the sight of you, the sound of your voice, the touch of your hand.

Mavis Gallant:

"What is the appeal about cats?" he said kindly. "I've always wanted to know." "They don't care i you like them. They haven't the slightest notion of gratitude, and they never pretend. They take what you have to offer, and away they go."

Theophile Gautier:

Sometimes he sits at your feet looking into your face with an expression so gentle and caressing that the depth of this gaze startles you. Who can believe that there is no soul behind those luminous eyes!

It is a matter to gain the affection of a cat. He is a philosophical animal, tenacious of his own habits, fond of order and neatness, and disinclined to extravagant sentiment. He will be your friend, if he finds you worthy of friendship, but not your slave.

God has created the cat to give man the pleasure of caressing the tiger.

W. L. George:

Cats know how to obtain food without labor, shelter without confinement, and love without penalties.

Bruce Graham:

Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will piss on your computer.

Paul Gray:

Cats were put into the world to disprove the dogma that all things were created to serve man.

Eric Gurney:

The really great thing about cats is their endless variety. One can pick a cat to fit almost any kind of decor, color scheme, income, personality, mood. But under the fur; whatever color it may be, there still lies, essentially unchanged, one of the world's free souls.

Bonni Elizabeth Hall (and Missycat):

When you come upon your cat, deep in meditation, staring thoughtfully at something that you can't see, just remember that your cat is, in fact, running the universe.

Terri L. Haney:

Apparently, through scientific research, it has been determined that a cat's affection gland is stimulated by snoring, thus explaining my cat's uncontrollable urge to rub against my face at 2 a.m.

Okay, cats will never bring you pictures they've drawn in school, but they may give you a dead mouse. What parent could resist that gift?

Robert A. Heinlein:

How we behave towards cats here below determines out status in heaven.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

Lynn Hollyn:

Essentially, you do not so much teach your cat as bribe him.

Lillian Johnson:

Some people say man is the most dangerous animal on the planet. Obviously those people have never met an angry cat.

Joseph Wood Krutch:

Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia.

Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want.

Jay Leno:

I've never understood why women love cats. Cats are independent, they don't listen, they don't come in when you call, they like to stay out all night, and when they're home they like to be left alone and sleep. In other words, every quality that women hate in a man, they love in a cat.

Sharon Lundblad:

A cat is a very special friend who comes into your life. When it comes it brings warmth, companionship, contentment and love. Whether it's long-haired, short-haired, pedigreed or "heinz" makes no difference.
A cat, though independent, has a way of letting you know that without you life just wouldn't be worthwhile.
If you're lucky enough to own a cat consider yourself one of life's winners because when you have a cat around you'll never be lonely; the sound of its purr will give you comfort, and as you hold it and pet it, stress will slip away.

Lady Sydney Morgan:

The playful kitten with its pretty little tigerish gambole is infinitely more amusing than half the people one is obliged to live with in the world.

Paula Poundstone:

The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their faces whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer.

Saki (H. H. Munro):

The cat is domestic only as far as suits its own ends.

Robert Stearns:

A human may go for a stroll with a cat; he has to walk a dog. The cat leads the way, running ahead, tail high, making sure you understand the arrangement. If you should happen to get ahead, the cat will never allow you to think it is following you. It will stop and clean some hard-to-reach spot, or investigate a suspicious movement in the grass; you will find yourself waiting a fidgeting like the lackey you are. But this is not annoying to cat lovers, who understand and appreciate a good joke, even when it is on them.

Sir Harry Swanson:

You can't own a cat. The best you can do is be partners.

Hippolyte Taine:

I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.

Mark Twain:

If animals could speak the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.

Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.

A home without a cat, and a well-fed, well-petted and properly revered cat may be a perfect home, perhaps, but how can it prove its title?

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.

Ignorant people think it's the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it's the sickening grammar they use.

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.

We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove-lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove-lid again - and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.

A cat is more intelligent than people believe, and can be taught any crime.

I simply can't resist a cat, particularly a purring one. They are the cleanest, cunningest, and most intelligent things I know, outside of the girl you love, of course.

Jeff Valdez:

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

Cynthia E. Varnado:

It is impossible to keep a straight face in the presence of one or more kittens.

Carl van Vechten:

A cat will sit washing his face within two inches of a dog in the most frantic state of barking rage, if the dog be chained.

The cat seldom interferes with other people's rights. His intelligence keeps him from doing many of the fool things that complicate life.

Robert J. Vogel:

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend.

Alfred North Whitehead:

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer.

ANONYMOUS:

There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.

There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats.

Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.
We humans are indeed fortunate if we happen to be chosen to be owned by a cat.

No Heaven will ever Heaven be
Unless my cats are there to welcome me.

Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this.

If you take even one of a cat's nine lives, it will haunt you forever.

I got rid of my husband. The cat was allergic.

My husband said it was him or the cat. I miss him sometimes.

Curiosity was framed. Ignorance killed the cat.

Never feed your cat anything that doesn't match the carpet.

Or as Schrodinger's wife once said, "What did you do to the cat? It looks half dead."

Cat's motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look as if the dog did it.

To respect a cat is the beginning of the aesthetic sense.

The visionary chooses a cat; the man of concrete a dog. Hamlet must have kept a cat. Platonists, or cat lovers, include sailors, painters, poets, and pickpockets. Aristotelians, or dog lovers, include soldiers, football players, and burglars.

Free to a good home - female cat or husband.
Husband says either he goes or cat goes.
Cat fixed, husband isn't.
       - Ad in the Flint, Michigan Weekly World News

Don't use cats - they'll screw up your data.
       - Anonymous science professor to student

Froward women were made from cats, just as most virtuous, industrious matrons were developed from beer.

I would have in my house - a reasonable woman - a cat moving among the books.

Of all the creatures in the world, cats an' women has the hardest time.

A cat knows you are the key to his happiness... a man thinks he is.

If to her share some feline errors fall,
Look in her face, and you'll forgive them all.

Here lies a pretty cat:
Its mistress, who never loved anyone,
Loved it madly;
Why bother to say so? Everyone can see it.
       - Epitaph on tombstone of cat, with full-relief detail of the deceased

Outside of a cat, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a cat, it's too dark to read.
       - Sign at Lilac Hedge Bookshop, Norwich, VT

Dogs have owners, cats have staff.

Avoid dogs whenever you can. Remember...Cats are poetry in motion. Dogs are gibberish in neutral.

Cat: a pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs, and patronizes human beings.

All children left unattended will be given a free kitten.
       - Sign in a veterinarian's office

Never hold a dustbuster and a cat at the same time.
       - from Advice from Kids

There was an old bulldog named Caesar,
Who went for a cat just to tease her;
    But she spat and she spit,
    Till the old bulldog quit.
Now when poor Caesar sees her, he flees her.

You know when people see a cat's litter box, they always say, "Oh, have you got a cat?" Just once I want to say, "No, it's for company!"

Humans: No fur, no paws, no tail. They run away from mice. They never get enough sleep. How can you help but love such an absurd animal?
       - An anonymous cat on Homo sapiens

The purity of a person's heart can be quickly measured by how they regard cats.

Blessed are those who love cats, for they shall never be lonely.

When I'm in the doghouse, my cats still come to visit.

A rose has thorns, a cat has claws; certainly both are worth the risk.

There are hundreds of good reasons for having a cat, but all you need is one.

A cat is always at the wrong side of the door.

A person who manages to understand a cat is qualified to understand most anything else.

Buy a dog a toy, and he'll play with it forever. Buy a cat a present, and it will play with the wrapper for 10 minutes.

Anything on the ground is a cat toy. Anything not there yet, will be.

Cats have amazingly keen hearing but go conveniently deaf when you call.

If human, cats might play solitare, but they would never sit around with the gang and a few six-packs watching Monday Night Football.       from Time Magazine, Dec.7, 1981

Cats have incredible vision - but they never see your flaws.

Cats are better than any vice. They're not fattening, dangerous, or expensive. However, they can be addictive.

A cat makes all the difference between coming home to an empty house and coming home.

Owning a cat is a good forerunner of marriage. You learn that you cannot control another living being, or expect him/her to do everything you want.

I'm not much of a cook. My favorite thing to make from scratch is a purr.

Nine lives added to my one life makes a perfect 10.

If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.
       - from Advice from Kids

Cats always land on their feet. Dogs won't even let you throw them.

A cat will wait until you've read your morning paper before tearing it to shreds.

Some people see the glass as half empty, some as half full. I look for the cat who drank the water.

Life is hard. Soften yours with a cat.

Said a miserly peer at the Abbey,
"I fear I shall look rather shabby,
    For I've replaced my ermine,
    Infested with vermin,
With the fur of my dear defunct tabby."

Happiness does not light gently on my shoulder like a butterfly. She pounces on my lap, demanding that I scratch behind her ears.

The cat stands alone, distinct ? outindividualizing every individual.       from A Ship of Solace

Owning a cat is like reading a good novel - just when you think you know the main character, she'll surprise you on the very next page.

A thing of beauty, strength, and grace lies behind that whiskered face.

Cats are like music. It's foolish to try to explain their worth to those who don't appreciate them.

Cats whiskers are so sensitive, they can find their way through the narrowest crack in a broken heart.

If you want to know the character of a man, find out what his cat thinks of him

Every life should have nine cats.

It's really the cat's house. I just pay the mortgage.

A cat which is kept as a household pet may properly be considered a thing of value. It ministers to the pleasures of its owner and serves with honor.

We have a friend who hates cats. Every time he comes to the house the cat sits on his knee.

Cats know how we feel; they just don't give a damn.

For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first be ignored by a cat.

It's always blackest just before you step on the cat.

If you can remember how many cats you have, you don't have enough.

Never underestimate the power of a purr.

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